This sentence means that as children, we should be filial, and as parents, we should treat our children with love. Only when parents are kind can children be filial, otherwise it is impossible for parents who are too strict to educate filial children.

However, the current educational concept is that strict father gives birth to a dutiful son, which leads many fathers to be particularly strict in educating their children. Although parents are strict, they are also good for their children. However, in the eyes of children, it will become sour, because they may not understand the good intentions of their parents.

situation

Teacher Zhang is a strict father in the eyes of others, because he always maintains high standards when educating his children, is unsmiling and always takes his children seriously. For example, teacher Zhang's child won the first place in the class in an exam. It must be very happy to be another parent, but Mr. Zhang still didn't give the child a good look, but asked the child why he didn't get the first place in the grade.

There are many such things, so Mr. Zhang's children have never heard his father's praise. And teacher Zhang also took the consequences for his too strict education. After the children entered junior high school, they basically stopped talking to Teacher Zhang. Asked why, the child said, "I hate my father." Other people's fathers are strict with their children, but he is so strict with me. I hate him to death. "

Teacher Zhang's case shows that parents are too strict with their children's education, which is actually a wrong way of education. People choose this wrong way of education because they misunderstand the meaning of strict father.

Strict father's sentence of "being a dutiful son" comes from an excerpt from Zeng Guang Xian Wen written by Tao Xi in Qing Dynasty: strict father is a dutiful son, but a loving mother is even more defeated.

The reason why Zhou said this sentence was based on the form at that time.

As we all know, the national strength of the Qing dynasty declined, and the children of those officials did nothing, just because their parents were lax in disciplining their children, so Zhou said this sentence to warn those parents. But now many people blindly adopt strict father's education method without knowing the specific situation, which is a misunderstanding of strict father.

Many fathers understand strict father's definition as suppressing children, and it is this wrong understanding that harms children's life. The real meaning of strict father is that when a child does something wrong, the father should stand up and point out the child's mistake, and keep a strict and responsible attitude towards the child's mistake, which is conducive to the child's correction.

However, when children make progress, parents should no longer act as strict father to attack children, but should turn into loving fathers and give them enough affirmation and encouragement.

Parents should play the role of strict father properly, otherwise it may bring harm to their children.

1.

Some strict fathers keep a principle in everything they do with their children, that is, total negation. Some fathers do this because they are afraid that praise will make their children proud. But the fact is that parents' denial will only hurt children's self-confidence and make them lift their heads.

2. The parent-child relationship is gradually alienated.

Some fathers are too strict, which will make children fear him. Research shows that most children are afraid of their fathers in childhood, so they are afraid to get close to their fathers. This fear of children will make the parent-child relationship more and more cold. Since the education method is too strict, it has a bad influence on children.

So how should father grasp strict father's yardstick?

1. Master the appropriate degree

Some fathers became strict father for the sake of strictness. If they can't maintain a certain degree in this strictness, they will go to extremes. Education should be moderate, excessive strictness and excessive doting will have a bad influence on children, so parents should maintain reasonable strictness.

2. Confirm your child in time.

When a child does a good job, the father should change his role in time, be a loving father, and actively affirm and encourage the child. Only when the child is affirmed by his father will he have great satisfaction in his heart. With this confidence, children will perform better in the face of the next difficulty.

Whether strict father or a loving father, a father has only one fundamental purpose, and that is to educate his children. Therefore, when educating children, fathers should not stick to the form, but should proceed from the children's feelings and satisfy them to the maximum extent.

If some children are suitable for education in strict father, it is understandable that the father is strict. On the contrary, if the child does not adapt to this kind of education, parents should correct it in time.