In family sex education, teenagers' paradise divides the usual sex education models into four types, namely, neglect, depression, tension and indulgence.
Neglect is basically the normal state of sex education in China, because people don't understand sex education and mistakenly think that sex education is to teach children to know sexual intercourse, and they don't pay attention to it, and they don't even keep silent when they see the changes of their children. Children will naturally understand this kind of thing when they are older. It's too early to tell him.
In the animal world, animals have seen adult animals mate since childhood, and will naturally do so when they grow up.
But human beings have moved towards civilization, divorced from the attributes of low-level animals, and our sexual intercourse is no longer primitive instinct. We have a sense of shame and morality.
Human sexual intercourse is private, and human sexual organs are also private.
Inadvertent privacy has become taboo, so talking about sex has also become taboo. As long as the child shows any sexual performance, it is shameful and guilty.
In such an environment, will children really be "natural"?
Once a child, we broke the last layer of fig leaf in the sexual jokes of our peers. From "vague things" to a thorough understanding that "men and women should touch that place", we successively entered adolescence, renting CDs, novels and online pornography. ...
After 1980s, men regarded Japanese actresses as sexual enlightenment teachers, which led many people to mistakenly think that the erotic violence and grandiose performances in pornographic movies were our real sexual life. ...
How many sexual crimes, violence, coercion and rude sexual events will happen in intimate relationships when things that are seriously divorced from reality are grafted into real life?
Many people can't find the entrance for the first time. In the difficult exploration, some people are sensitive and fragile. After several unsuccessful returns, their lofty temperament was depressed, and they gradually stepped into the ranks of older singles and swallowed the bitter fruit alone.
Or rude and reckless, leaving a shocking pool of "virgin blood", but I don't know that the delicate parts are destroyed and injured.
When they grow up, they will naturally know. It can be seen that the process from children's ignorance to knowledge is not really "natural", but the most abnormal way. The knowledge gained is not only useless, but harmful.
Parents have seen repressive sex education, but I don't allow it. To keep children pure, children are not allowed to have sexual awareness and sexual performance. Once there are signs, they will try their best to suppress them.
In the movie Peacock, the father dug up a nude sketch in his youngest son's exercise book. His pulling and humiliation of his children led his son to run away from home at the sensitive and melancholy age of 17, and he was displaced for the rest of his life.
Humiliating children will give them a bad mental stimulus. After being forcibly suppressed, they will be anxious, ashamed, guilty and dirty, and live in such feelings. What child doesn't hate himself?
Not only does it affect self-acceptance and make people feel inferior, but it is also easy to become a person with sexual psychological disorder/dysfunction.
Therefore, don't be a depressed parent, which has a great influence on children's physical and mental health. Unless you want to destroy your child, don't do it when you find your child crossing the fence.
In recent years, intensive education is rapidly replacing neglected sex education and becoming the type of education for parents who lack knowledge and skills in sex education.
I see the child's sexual problems, but I don't know how to speak. When children ask related questions, they are at a loss, such as where I come from. ...
Parents have the will to give an answer, but they didn't tell us the answer when they were young, so children will be very nervous when they ask this question and don't know how to answer it properly.
It turned out that the child asked me frankly where I came from and why my penis was different from my father's. As a result, I felt the panic of my parents, so the children began to feel that any topic involving that was not good.
Children explore sexual secrets alone in a sense of mystery, curiosity and shame.
Pampering sex education is usually because parents are busy with work or divorced, neglecting to discipline their children.
In the indulgent sex education, boys' families are the main ones, and my family is my son, not a spoiled "cabbage". There are also parents who lack common knowledge of homosexuality and are afraid that their children will become gay when they grow up. In order to avoid "tragedy", they are encouraged to "fall in love" with their opposite sex classmates from an early age.
Children grow up under this "enlightened" educational concept, and may have sexual impulses earlier and more frequently after puberty.
Sexual behavior brings the possibility of sexually transmitted diseases and AIDS, but also has potential harm. After children have casual sex, it will have an impact on normal intimate relationships.
In love relationships, doting children are more likely to be irresponsible.
When you don't need to put in a lot of emotions, you just need sweet words to get sexual resources. Sexual relationship is just a game for children to vent their sexual desire.
Even if they have emotional needs, the objects of their emotional needs will point to more idealized characters, and it is difficult to find their ideal partner in reality.
Indulgence education is not without loss, but the perspective has not been stretched to a certain extent.
Sex education for children has to be said to be a big challenge for parents. What kind of sex education is good?
Here, Paradise for Teenagers' Growth summarizes the last and fifth types of family sex education.
Whether parents want their children to know and see sex or not, in fact, children have been influenced by their own exploration, peers, internet, media, television and so on in the process of growing up. Once they are blocked by adults on the road of cognition, he will embark on other cognitive paths alone with confusion.
Reasonable guidance is characterized by visibility and attention. Compared with the education of avoiding teaching and learning without teaching, it is to let parents look straight and guide.
Let children know and see the existence of sex and accept the healthy existence of sex, which is the most ideal sex education.
The most direct manifestation of reasonable guidance is to guide the growing children to understand. As parents, we only need to observe whether the child has deviated from the track of healthy growth in the process of understanding and help the child adjust in time.
Children see the existence of sex in front of the road, and adults are guides on the road. It is obvious that children are going to be cognitive, instead of letting them lose themselves on the road of cognition.
In reasonably guided sex education, parents are the guides to guide children not to get lost in their growth, especially in the rapid growth stage of adolescence.
This is a reasonable sex education that meets the needs of children's life growth.
Finally, it is important to say again that there is no anxiety about selling or threatening, just a solemn reminder: don't let children know about sex, find the answer to sex by themselves. This is irresponsible and may affect his later sexual cognition, interpersonal relationship, sexual behavior and sexual function and even his normal life.
The research of different data shows that the lack of sex education and gender emotional education will not only lead to social diseases, early pregnancy and abortion, sexual crimes, but also lead to sexual relations, sexual dysfunction in intimate relationships, emotional crisis of sex and love and many other problems. )
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What about reasonably guided sex education?
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