Children's hearts are fragile and they need support and understanding. Every word of encouragement will give children confidence, but a rude reprimand, like invisible violence, will greatly hurt their dignity. What can't you say to your child? Parents quickly compare:
1, we are dying, son, it's up to you.
Taking children's development as their only hope is a loss of self. This kind of parents often muddle along and suffer from loss. Although the sense of self-loss is shared by parents, it is not a healthy mentality and will have a negative impact on children.
2. Look at others.
Perhaps this is the longest sentence that parents say, and it is also the most annoying sentence for children. This comparison is a great interference to the establishment of children's values and a kind of destruction to children's self-evaluation system.
I don't have time for you. How can you live without making money?
Celebrity said: "No time is no time to be a man." Spending time with children is the greatest premise of education.
4, baby, dad is not obedient, hit him.
It is often seen that some parents treat their children as toys or pets and make jokes of this kind and that kind for fun. You should know that children will not distinguish right from wrong when they are young, and what behavior will be strengthened when they are encouraged and stimulated. Parents should not make fun of their children casually. In these boring jokes, children will form bad habits and breed bad values.
5, into the top three, mom bought it for you. ...
Material rewards seem to be a guarantee to enhance children's motivation, but in fact, the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. Children don't learn for their parents. They failed in the exam and got a good reward, which destroyed their normal understanding of knowledge and encouraged their utilitarianism.
6. There is no reason. I said no, no.
This is a typical tyrant-style education method, which stems from the traditional concept of "a dutiful son is born under a stick" in parents' minds. This will not only lead to confrontation between parents and children, but also undermine and hinder the growth of children's sense of justice and democracy, lack of negotiation ability, and even breed violent tendencies.
7. Who cares how you wear it?
When parents say this, it is not that the children are completely out of control, but that they are just careless accomplices of old mistakes, which will make the children feel wronged. The first two uses of such methods may make children feel guilty, but if they are used too much, they will cause rebellious psychology and simply make mistakes.
8. The child is mine, and I can do whatever I want.
Because children are raised by themselves, they regard them as their private property, impose their wishes on them, let their emotions vent at will, and ignore their personal wishes. It will make children feel disgusted. Over time, the relationship between children and parents will be tense or rebellious.
9. Why are you so stupid
Repeated verbal denial is tantamount to destroying children's self-confidence, making children self-denial and getting more and more afraid of the same thing.
10, who are you with if mom and dad get divorced?
If it's a real divorce, that's another matter. If it's just a joke, it's silly and the children will feel scared. He will certainly wonder why mom and dad want to divorce. Did they leave me? Of course, he will consider who he is with, but the result is even worse, because he finds it painful to be with anyone. Such repeated anxiety is likely to form depression.
If it is harmful to children, there are countless examples. As parents, we should always reflect on what we said to our children, and we need to spread positive energy and correct outlook on life and values to our children. Only in this way can our children be confident and positive!