First of all, recognize the essence of rebellious psychology.
Rebellious psychology refers to a psychological state in which people take opposite attitudes and words and deeds to each other's demands in order to maintain their self-esteem. Faced with the strong "rebellious psychology" of teenagers, many educators, including school teachers and parents, feel very helpless. And this kind of "rebellious psychology" may appear in different stages of teenagers' growth process, and it also has various degrees of performance. For example, there are negative thoughts of disapproval and distrust of the positive propaganda of schools or parents; Unreasonable doubts about advanced figures and role models, or even fundamental denial; With the feeling of identifying with bad tendencies, drink their colors; Negation, contempt and opposition to ideological education and discipline.
Specifically, teenagers' rebellious psychology is mainly manifested in the following aspects: (1) They don't like their parents' excessive care, management or intervention; But to practice by myself, I especially hate repeated instructions and requests from adults. (2) I don't want to discuss many things with my parents, but decide for myself. (3) Parents are no longer obedient; But they have their own opinions and opinions, and dare to put forward their own different opinions. (4) For traditional ideas, ready-made conclusions and authorities often do not blindly follow; But a critical attitude. In a word, they oppose adults to treat themselves as "children" and demand to appear as adults.
Second, recognize the factors of rebellious psychology.
Today, the life of most families is centered on the only child, who is pampered and lacks psychological communication and guidance, which makes many children sensitive, fragile and lacking psychological quality. Middle school is the most rebellious period in one's life. Some "good boys" who were obedient in primary school gradually changed in middle school, became disobedient, or looked like a completely different person. So what are the factors that affect teenagers' rebellious psychology? To sum up, there are the following aspects:
(A) subjective factors
Teenagers' physical and mental development has made great progress, and their sexual development has gradually matured, but their physical and mental development is unbalanced or even contradictory. On the one hand, they think that they have grown up and should manage themselves and make their own decisions. On the other hand, due to physical maturity and psychological immaturity, specifically, due to lack of experience and experience, their understanding is not firm and easy to shake; Although their thinking is subjective and critical, there are great deviations in their cognition of things and their views on problems, which leads to one-sided, extreme, stubborn and extreme cognition. Teachers' normal education is often thought from the opposite side. Teachers' persuasion, demands and criticism are regarded as "management", "card" and "pressure" by parents' guidance, reminder and supervision, which is unfavorable to themselves and hurts their self-esteem, and then puts themselves on the opposite side of teachers. Therefore, in the face of teachers' education and parents' advice, they consciously or unconsciously avoid, dislike or even deviate. Teachers' tireless teaching, parents' earnest exhortation, etc., have long been dispelled by strong consciousness and sense of adulthood.
(B) objective factors
The objective factors of teenagers' rebellious psychology are:
1, the influence of bad family factors. Family is the basic environment for teenagers to grow up and the first place to receive education in life. Some families' bad educational methods directly affect the formation of teenagers' rebellious psychology. For example, parents' simple and rude education methods, such as imperative and arbitrary education methods, as well as high expectations and strict requirements in life and study, all of which have invisibly caused a kind of pressure on children's psychology. When this kind of pressure continues to accumulate and precipitate, teenagers will be emotionally dissatisfied and then have rebellious psychology.
2. The influence of bad factors in school. School is the main environment for teenagers' growth and socialization, and the role of bad factors in school is also one of the main factors for teenagers to have rebellious psychology. Negative factors in schools have an impact on the rebellious psychology of young students, mainly in the following aspects:
First of all, the deviation and improper methods of teacher education guiding ideology. The main reason is that teachers have not seriously explored the best and most effective education methods, and education is boring, which makes students feel disgusted or psychologically rebellious about education.
Secondly, in the teaching process, teachers don't respect young students and don't consider their psychological feelings and experiences. When they have problems, they do not stand in the perspective of teenagers, but blindly emphasize the dignity of teachers, which leads to their rejection of educators themselves, and then have a rebellious attitude towards our education.
Thirdly, some teachers can't objectively evaluate students' personality, ability and grades. Paying too much attention to grades and clinging to students' small mistakes make students think that "teachers lose confidence in themselves" and emotionally oppose, deviate or even do the opposite.
3. The influence of bad social factors. With the advent of the information age and the development of mass communication, the influence of mass media on teenagers is expanding day by day, which not only provides new ways for teenagers to learn, seek knowledge and receive education, but also brings some negative effects. Mass media pays attention to the public in information selection and practice, but ignores the concern for young audiences, so that some bad and secular factors in adult culture, or the content originally used to warn the public and teenagers because of exposing a certain phenomenon or the consistency of programs, are passively accepted by teenagers; In addition, because mass communication also emphasizes freshness, it introduces some fashionable novel phenomena at home and abroad, such as punk, hippie and rock culture with anti-judgment spirit, which also influences and radiates the formation of anti-cultural mentality and anti-cultural consciousness of China teenagers.
Third, correctly adjust students' rebellious psychology.
Faced with all kinds of rebellious behaviors of teenagers, some teachers and parents sometimes feel annoyed, don't understand, lack necessary and correct guidance and education, think that they are "unruly" and "rebellious", and think that rotten wood cannot be carved, or even hopeless. In the face of students' rebellion, as a teacher, you should make the most appropriate way to resolve children's rebellion.
Different students have the same rebellion, and the treatment will vary from person to person for different reasons.
To help such students change the status quo, it is most important to communicate with them. We should communicate like friends, find a common language and make them trust you. But take your time, don't face his resistance directly, smile and negotiate with him to deal with the problem. First, respect him. They were ignored, so they appeared as "rebels". Education and the educated are interdependent, and the educated need our guidance. The educational guiding role of educators is realized in the continuous improvement of the effective socialization and healthy development ability of the educated. Correctly solving this relationship and establishing the consciousness of loving education, especially ideological education, will actively explore the contents, forms and methods of our education and respect teenagers in professional work. Only in this way can we reduce teenagers' psychological antipathy and weaken and eliminate rebellious psychology.
The second is to touch him with true feelings. True love is an invisible hand. For teenagers who are not mature physically and psychologically, their behavior intention and decision-making are greatly influenced by emotional factors. What they like, what they don't like, and whether they like it or not directly affect their behavior. Students' enthusiasm for learning is high, largely because they like a teacher. If we educators are more compatible and close to the educated emotionally, I believe that teenagers' psychology will not have this kind of disgust, deviation and rebellion, and will naturally be diluted or eliminated.