First, sentimentality is not suitable for children. He may cry more, but that's not a disadvantage. Crying may indicate that his language expression ability is not perfect and he can't accurately express his wishes in words. You reflect on yourself. Did you give full affirmation when the child expressed it in words? Don't you care if he expresses it in words? Far less than his crying. Do you care more?
Second, children are unwilling to contact strangers, or dare not speak in front of strangers, which is because they are not confident enough. It is normal for him to realize that the age of leaving my protection has passed and he is a little wary of strangers. Many children are like this. As long as they are familiar with it, they can talk and play games with others. It doesn't matter. Don't be too demanding. At this time, you can take your children to play outside. In public, there are many people, but you won't take the initiative to say hello to him. He will get used to it gradually. At ordinary times, we should build up children's self-confidence, which is nothing more than praise and criticism.
Third, cowardice is not a shortcoming, and it is more normal to be afraid of criticism from others. So do we, right? In what ways is your child timid? Is it timid to walk carefully and be afraid of falling? Or are you afraid of making mistakes? The former is ok, doing more exercise is easy to improve, and the latter is still that children are not confident enough!
Fourth, children are self-centered and unable to take care of too much. They can't and can't be perfunctory and hypocritical in adult society. This is not a child's fault.
To sum up, as you said, I think what we see is not the shortcomings of children, but your parenting concept is very problematic. The above question is actually very simple, that is, you have not cultivated your child's self-confidence! I think: you are great, you are very capable, and you may say little about this.
You should exaggerate your expression when you say this. Don't deal with it. Let the child really see that you are so surprised and happy about his progress and what he can do. Thank you very much. In this way, children will be more determined to do it.
My children are also timid. His timidity is the kind of timidity that dare not do anything, but he knows that he will say, "I am very capable, if only I could go up and down the stairs!" " I want to practice hard. "This is really what my child said. Parents should help their children see their own advantages and disadvantages, evaluate themselves accurately and know how to improve. We can't do it without asking our children to be perfect, can we?
My children don't want to say hello to others. A child was called his name in class, but he didn't seem to hear it. I told my child that I knew he was not rude, but embarrassed and didn't know how to answer. I told him to call others in the future, at least promise, otherwise it would not be embarrassing, but rude.
You, too. Your children are too insecure, which is caused by your criticism. He has begun to resent and fear your criticism, which will make him more stagnant, more cautious and more timid before doing things. From now on, you should learn to see the advantages from your child, exaggerate his advantages and praise and affirm him at any time. Don't rush to identify his shortcomings, don't compare with others, but tell children how to improve and how to do it. Children have their own growth process, so give them more time to wait and less demands and accusations. If you can, read more books to understand the law of children's own growth. Don't rush, haste makes waste.
Finally, you should think about our adult world, there are no perfect people. Why force children to be human?