Sexual orientation is a complicated matter, unlike smoking and drinking. Homosexuality, whether heterosexual or homosexual, is a normal sexual orientation of human beings and does not belong to diseases.
Having said that, as parents, if children are different from ordinary people in this respect, perhaps the most unbearable thing is the pointing of relatives, friends and neighbors, or being talked about "how to be parents", which may be the failure of parents.
It's unacceptable It's true. However, as a child, what does he think? Maybe he has the most say in his life.
Of course, if he also feels pain, then he can seek professional services of psychological counseling.
Finally, I want to say that it is not easy to have the opportunity to be ourselves in our short life. Children are being themselves. In addition to respect and understanding, it is also important for us as parents to express our views. Of course, it is a child's choice to listen or not. Others may really be unable to help.
I am Zuo Shu, a psychology teacher who is engaged in psychology and mental health education. Let me answer your question.
Whether a counselor can help your son change homosexuality is based on the following points. The work of psychological counselors is based on objectivity, neutrality and respect for facts, without any guarantee.
First, there is something wrong with your child's sexual orientation; Judging from the question you asked, your child has a sexual orientation problem, that is, he has a sexual orientation problem. He likes the same sex or has a tendency to like the same sex, which is what we usually call homosexuality or homosexual tendency in psychology.
I will also encounter such problems when I give psychological counseling to students in college. Let me show you such a case first. "I'm a college student, but I find myself a homosexual and like uncle type. What should I do? " I have liked a boy in my class since high school. We are very good friends and always stay together. He also cares about everything about me. He will help me no matter what. My parents are away, I am sick, and he will take care of me. People are calm and responsible, just like my brother. When I was bored and lonely, he chatted with me until I wanted to sleep. He doesn't know I like him. I don't know what he would think of me if he knew I liked me. I have always been afraid of losing him and want to be with him forever, even if I just look at him. What should I do? "
Second, I don't know. How old is your son this year? If it is a teenager, there is still the possibility of change; Why? It is normal for teenagers to have a tendency to like the same sex at this time. In fact, most of them can't be called homosexuality. This phenomenon is called same-sex attachment, which may be caused by physiological factors (genetic factors), but it is more from psychological factors. Inferiority can also lead to same-sex attachment, mainly because you are not confident enough about yourself. For example, your height and appearance are not as good as other same-sex people, so it is easy to have same-sex attachment. As long as it does not exclude the opposite sex, it is not gay. Please face up to this same-sex attachment psychology. Please also identify your son's homosexuality. Does it belong to this category? Whether your son is gay or homosexual, adolescence is a particularly challenging period for homosexuality. Correct guidance, positive treatment and no repression can help teenagers change their negative sexual orientation and eliminate their misunderstanding of homosexuality.
Thirdly, if your son has entered adolescence, frankly speaking, parents should be prepared to accept a gay or homosexual son. If the son is gay, parents must go through a series of processes such as surprise, denial, reflection, resentment and pain. In many ways, the loss of a child's heterosexual orientation is equivalent to a sad death, because of many expectations of heterosexuality, such as marriage, family and childbirth. , has vanished; I suggest that parents do psychological counseling to eliminate the guilt or psychological discomfort caused by factors that may lead their son to become gay (such as unhappy childhood and disagreement with parents). ); At the same time, be prepared to accept your child's new identity. Of course, it takes time, and you may do it forever. But as a counselor, I can only answer your question like this.
Thanks again for the invitation!
You can see your inner anxiety and helplessness from the question. I can understand how you feel inside. Who can accept that their children are different from children of the same sex? In the eyes of most people, homosexuality is an alternative. What do others think? It's embarrassing, even embarrassing. Coupled with the traditional concept, "there are three unfilial, and none is great", how can you accept such a good person! Whether counselors can help children change homosexuality is not a simple question. All the questions are in the children's section. In the psychological period, there is a saying that homosexuality can be divided into pseudo-homosexuality and true homosexuality. The former is purely psychological, while the latter has genetic reasons. This statement needs further verification. According to the above statement, the focus of psychological counselors is psychological counseling, and the result depends on the wishes of visitors! Tell a small case to illustrate. A young man in his twenties wets the bed when he is nervous. After many tests, his physiological indexes show that he is healthy. Later, he went to a psychological counselor. After he came out, others asked him, "Did the counselor solve your problem of wetting the bed?" Answer: "not yet, but he made me never have to worry about wetting the bed again!" " "Later, the consultant used hypnosis to treat a trauma when he was 8 years old, and the problem of bedwetting was solved! First of all, he was in good health, had had trauma, found a fixed point, conducted counseling education, and finally solved the problem. What happened to the gay son? Maybe you won't understand until you explore. As parents, we should first learn to accept and face it, and then actively think of ways. What is the final result? Let nature take its course! There are three things in life, your own business, others' business and God's business! We can only mind our own business, be ourselves and do our parents' duty for our children! You can trust me privately if you have any questions! !
Honestly, I can't. If a counselor says, I can help your child correct his sexual orientation: liar.
The causes of sexual orientation are very complicated, but most of them have congenital effects, not mental illness. However, if you or your family are suffering from this kind of pain and you can't solve it yourself, it is recommended to seek psychological counseling.
Psychological counseling can't change sexual orientation, but it can help visitors better cope with inner depression and external environment through conversation.
The vernacular is that same-sex orientation is not a disease, and it does not need treatment itself; If you or your family doesn't accept it at first, it's not a disease, but a normal reaction to this minority tendency. However, if you still don't accept it for a long time, it will be particularly painful for you, and even if your family turns against you, you need to deal with emotional problems. It is best to consult. Anyone who is uncomfortable can consult, and family therapy can also be done together.
A counselor can only change your mind. Sexual orientation is irreversible, just as you can't be gay and your son can be heterosexual! Love your son well, and homosexuals can also be filial to their parents!
Parents' lewdness and sin are rewarded on their children, making parents repent and turn over a new leaf. These Buddhist classics have already clearly told the world. However, the loss and ridicule of Buddhist truth at present make karma seem to be inseparable. In fact, Buddhist classics have long solved the correct path from thought to behavior. As long as it is realized and practiced, everything will be fine.
No, you should find a professional counselor and listen to what they have to say. A counselor can help you understand and make you understand your son. Solve your troubles and pains.
I think "psychological doctor" is a profession, and he can't change himself. How can he change a person's soul?
No, I suggest you find him a boyfriend quickly.
Impossible to change! You don't need to think.