Regret is nothing more than a mistake or mistake. Whether it is a mistake or a mistake, it is just disappointment. So Chip Conley summed up the emotional formula of regret in How to Control Your Emotions: regret = disappointment+responsibility. There will be disappointment when there is expectation, and the greater the expectation, the greater the disappointment. Disappointment inspires a sense of responsibility and makes us work harder. The stronger the sense of responsibility, the higher the expectations and the more regrets.
The pursuit of perfection is everyone's characteristic. Even those who look sloppy at ordinary times want to finish what they started. Just as we write, even if it is cursive, the strokes will not be less; Just like we draw a circle, we never deliberately leave a gap; Just as we cook, we will never cook it half-baked; Just like when we are chatting, we don't leave without saying goodbye.
People have expectations when they are alive, and they want to have a good result when they do things. For example, if you go to school, you must have a diploma, graduation ceremony, graduation photo, graduation photo album, and a few intimate photos ... Primary school, junior high school, high school and university want to finish every stage.
If you drop out of school, whether actively or passively, there will be regrets at any stage. This will lead to the failure of parents' hopes for success, one of the main reasons is to make up for academic regrets. There are also some adults who take adult exams, self-study exams or various training courses. In addition to work needs, it is mainly to make up for the shortcomings in my study.
I am a vivid example. I once gave up the opportunity to re-take the college entrance examination for financial reasons at home. I have been studying hard in my spare time for many years, just to prove that I have the academic ability of the university. I am qualified for many professional jobs. Unfortunately, I didn't have a chance to get a university degree accredited by Xuexin.com. Fortunately, I had the time and the full support of my family two years ago, so I took part in the self-taught examination of Chinese language and literature. Now I have got a college diploma. Under normal circumstances, you can apply for an undergraduate diploma at the end of this year's 10 exam. I'm still a little excited to think about it. The next stage depends on whether you can take the postgraduate entrance examination. Although we are over forty years old, we always want to make up for our lack of study. After all, some students are already postdocs.
The pursuit of perfection is everyone's unremitting pursuit, whether it is education, career or family, I hope I will be perfect from beginning to end. There is another strong reason why we have regrets, that is, emotional factors, especially lovelorn. Regret in emotion occupies a relatively large position in the heart. Compared with their studies and careers, people have deeper emotional investment and more expectations. For various reasons, there are countless feelings that cannot be avoided, which also leads to all kinds of emotional regrets.
Emotional investment is a double-edged sword. If you don't give your true feelings, you won't get true love. If you give true love, you risk disappointment. Unfortunately, I either didn't see it or paid it by mistake.
Since regret is common, how to deal with it? On the one hand, regret is not necessarily a bad thing, but it can inspire us to pursue perfection. On the one hand, we can lower our expectation and expectation of regret, so that we will feel less regret. On the one hand, it weakens the sense of responsibility and reduces the pursuit of perfection. If some shortcomings can be ignored, don't take them too seriously. If you break it down like this, you may regret less pain and less anxiety.
There is no such thing as regret. If you take it too seriously, you will regret it. Life is in a hurry Don't be too immersed in sadness. If you are happy, happiness is naturally everywhere.