2. When I was a child, my family was poor and I had no money to buy a bike. I had to take a taxi to school every day. When I was in junior high school, because my grades were too outstanding, the school leaders made me study for two more years. After graduating from junior high school, the high school principal thought I had a future and overcharged me by 30 thousand. In the third year of senior high school, the class teacher thought I had the ability to survive independently and dropped out of school.
3. Advertisement of a flower shop: Today, the price of roses in our shop is the lowest. You can even buy some roses for your wife.
The only difference between Superman and me is that I wear underwear underneath!
5. The effect of contraception: if you don't succeed, you will become a "person".
6. I am not a casual person! But whatever, it is not a person!
7. Even though you have teeth! Don't feel sorry for yourself, just have teeth! You can dig sweet potatoes, cover your chin when it rains, separate the tea residue when you drink tea, and use it as a knife and fork when you have a picnic. Do you think you are the best?
8. The family is harmonious, the life is Kangxi, the personality is Yongzheng, the career is prosperous, everything is celebrated, the future is bright, the wealth is Xianfeng, and both inside and outside are in charge, Qian Qiu Guangxu, make public!
10. I am in the Jianghu, but there is no legend about me in the Jianghu!
1 1. About thongs: I used to take off my underwear to look at my ass; Now, take out your ass and look at your underwear. ...
12. Take other people's road and let others have no way out!
13. I am like a fly lying on the glass, with a bright future, but I can't find a way out.
14. Huns are down and out in rivers and lakes, and they can't tell the difference between east, west, north and south. Hit the corner and count the stars on the ground!
15. I heard that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. In retrospect, I actually streaked 19 years too many chefs!
16. What is pressure, wife and children are pressure, what is motivation, and wife and children are motivation.
17. The brothers in the dormitory decided to punish the invigilator Zhang as follows: let him hold the telephone pole covered with advertisements of old Chinese medicine and cry with tears: My illness has finally been saved!
19. Go through the ladies' room three times and don't go in!
20. I, as far as IQ is concerned, 10 brain teasers can get 8 answers immediately; On knowledge, when I was 10, I had been studying for 8 years. There are only 10 minutes left until the paper is finished. I can dictate a beautiful article, record it, change up to eight words, and then I can publish it. As far as memory is concerned, I can only remember 8 of 10 phone numbers once. As far as endurance is concerned, I can urinate in the morning 10 until 8 pm the next day. ......
2 1. Rats never waste time at night, but we humans waste one-third of our time every day.
22. "What is an optimist?" "This ..... is like a teapot, with a red ass and the mood to whistle!"
23. I would rather believe in ghosts than men's broken mouths!
24. The most "damaging" sentence now is: "You are really fucking Japanese."
No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make you cry!
26. Deliberate study, deliberate work, deliberate life, and deliberate life like an individual!
27. Put down your college student's shelf and find a bowl of rice first!
28. Don't look for me if you have nothing to do, and don't look for me if you have anything to do! Classic 1
The foot of my bed is shining with such bright light. Is it frosty already? Looking up, I found it was moonlight. My name is Degang Guo! -Quoted from Degang Guo
Classic 2
The person in charge of the criminal detention shouted: "Put down the stinky tofu! Release the hostages! Raise your hand and surrender! This is your only chance! " -Quoted from the Legend of Wulin.
classic iii
1On June 6th, 644, Manchu people invaded Beijing and made outstanding contributions to China's future TV series. -a Shanghai poet commented on the Qing opera that is now flooding.
Classic 4
I am beautiful and single. Men can't be uninterested in me! I dare to wear what others dare not wear, say what others dare not say, and do what others dare not do! I am like a peach, and Wong Kar-wai is a juicer. -Quoted from Zhang Ziyi
Classic 5
Never ask your wife about her internal affairs, and never ask Google diplomacy! -User quotation
Classic 6
Son, new time and space, I am connected to the world! -China Mobile immediately responded to a recent activity launched by China Unicom with Grandpa Jay Chou as the image spokesperson, called "Only grandchildren can play M-Zone". They claim that they have signed a contract with Yao Ming's father, and will soon launch a large-scale promotion of the slogan "Son in the new time and space, father connected with the world". (Jianghu rumors)
Classic 7
No way! I can tell you! -China Unicom hired 82-year-old newlywed Yang Zhenning as the new image spokesperson with the slogan: "I'm OK!" In order to fight back, China Mobile immediately invited Yang Zhenning's wife, Weng Fan, as a new image spokesperson and publicized the slogan: "You can't, I can call you yes!" (Jianghu rumors)
Classic 8
As soon as a boy turns over, he will become a girl; When a girl turns over, she becomes a woman! -The iron fences on a university campus are all pointed, and the warning signs on them are all slogans.
Classic 9
All three of us are studying for MBA! -Shanghai launched a children's MBA education program with a tuition fee of 20,000 yuan for two years, and more than 700 children competed for it. A white-collar worker has the above proud words.
Classic 10
As the mayor, you should try your best to provide all kinds of services for the citizens, but sorry, this one is not included. -Andy Lau's ex-girlfriend Kexin Yu declared that Taipei Mayor Ma Ying Jiu was his ideal artificial insemination object, and Ma Ying Jiu responded.