To nag is to say the same thing over and over again. So what harm does parents' nagging do to children? Let's take a look!
First, parents' nagging is an educational way that can't keep up with children's development rhythm.
Parents encounter children's problems, or things that children must remember, if repeated many times, for children with self-concept, it is tantamount to ignoring their feelings and their own face. Outdated educational methods will have no effect, not only wasting your breath, but also causing children's negative emotions or appearing in the eyes of parents (Weibo)? Disobedient? . See case analysis: a good education should adapt to the rhythm of children.
Second, parents' nagging will make them lose their hearing.
Many times, when parents see their children's problems, they are often manifestations of their children's nature, not all mistakes. If parents don't give their children a chance to explain, but keep saying it themselves, the children will not be able to say it if they are afraid of being full. Even if the child says something, parents think it is the child's sophistry. Therefore, people have two ears and two eyes, but only one mouth, that is, to see more, listen more, talk less and listen more!
Third, parents' nagging is a way of communication that looks down on people and doesn't respect others.
Under normal circumstances, it is necessary to give children appropriate reminders, but parents' endless nagging is tantamount to unilateral accusations in disguise, with no respect or recognition at all. Sometimes children clearly know that they can do well, and parents' nagging is equivalent to taking away the credit. When they are wrong, parents' nagging becomes prescient, which greatly hurts children's self-esteem and self-confidence.
Fourth, parents' nagging will break the communication between parents and children, and children will lose their attachment to home.
Children are not parents' accessories, and nagging not only hurts the relationship between parents and children, but also extends parents' anxiety and pressure to children. If parents still discipline their children as they did when they were children, it will only deepen the rift of parent-child relationship. So, the home that should be a safe haven has become in the eyes of children? Storm? Center. What happens to children when they reach puberty? Run away? Phenomenon. See how to judge the parent-child relationship? 》。
Fifth, parents' nagging will make children feel insecure.
To some extent, nagging is a sign of distrust and accusation. Parents are not good at controlling their emotions and vent their expectations and dissatisfaction on their children. In the long run, parents' self-confidence will be passed on to their children, and they will bear great psychological pressure, which will seriously make their children feel insecure. When children's negative emotions accumulate too much, it will also affect their personality and personality development.
Sixth, excessive nagging makes children feel controlled.
Parents' rambling clearly shows that they occupy a strong position. Even if children want to talk, they are unprepared, let alone resisting. If parents control their children's lives too much, it is a very selfish performance, and it is not really good for children. However, where there is oppression, there is resistance. Because of strength, children may not erupt for a while, and when they reach puberty, it is equivalent to a volcanic eruption. See "A strong mother will make her son unmanly".
Seventh, parents' nagging is easy for children to get? Immune? And the parent-child relationship is damaged.
Like pesticides, nagging makes insects immune to overuse. Children repeatedly hear their parents say the same thing, and once they get used to it, they begin to resist. When parents say it, they try to avoid it in their minds and try to think of something irrelevant to the current nagging, thus ignoring their parents' voices. Therefore, when parents are nagging, they can often observe that their children are distracted or? Fugue? Situation.
Eighth, parents' nagging is one of the important reasons for killing children's sense of responsibility.
Parents' constant nagging and preaching can easily make children feel dependent. They think that they will be reminded that they will not work hard anyway. When something goes wrong, parents will be blamed and become a typical external attribution. Therefore, children who have been nagged for a long time lack sense of responsibility and independence, become lazy and lax, only take care of their parents at ordinary times, and it is difficult to obtain individual freedom and all-round development. See developing bad habits: talking too much? No? 》。
Ninth, parents' nagging is a negative way of thinking and an unhealthy attitude towards life.
Nagging is parents' own views on life experiences, and even there are many prejudices, misunderstandings and dissatisfaction, which is equivalent to transferring pressure to children. A nagging person never cares about other people's feelings, which will cause great psychological harm to children and completely distort the status and image of parents. When this demonstration is accepted by children, children will also become negative and have many misunderstandings about others.
Tenth, parents' nagging is a disguised comparison and label.
Parents often do it by nagging? Vent? Quote and repeat other people's words directly, or use the advantages of other people's children to talk about their own children's problems. For example, teachers will evaluate their children the same as other children. Parrots learn to talk? Like a child? Tell? . In this way, nagging becomes a constant contrast, so that children always feel inferior to others, probably? Broken cans and broken falls? ,? Be obedient? Our child is very hurt! See Children's Good and Evil? Labeling? 》。
Therefore, parents who will educate their children are tolerant, relaxed and generous, rather than telling them what to do. Good parents will respect their children and change? Say? For what? Listen. Only make principled suggestions to children, so as to gain their trust and recognition. Conversely, if the child is nagged for a long time and has nowhere to run under the influence of negative emotions, will he start work? Selective deafness? To protect themselves. In this way, parents' education will not work.
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