-Reading Carnegie's Emotional Management.

Xunzi said: "People can't live without groups." Yan fu also pointed out in his theory of evolution: "those who can live in groups will perish without groups;" Those who are good at groups survive, and those who are not good at groups die. "Visible, born in the world, we must learn to integrate into social groups. In this way, we can learn, gain and enjoy.

In real life, whether men, women, children, rich or poor, whether you like it or not, whether you are conscious or not, your emotions are not only the result of other people's behaviors and emotions, but also affect other people's emotions and behaviors. Therefore, learn how to manage your emotions in interpersonal communication, and "treat yourself as others and treat others as yourself" in communication; Treat others as others, treat yourself as yourself ",in order to truly get happiness and happiness, and move towards success and glory.

/kloc-In the 3rd century, the prince of North Wales, Levellon, had a loyal and fierce dog, Gellert. One day, the prince went hunting and left the dog at home to look after the baby. When the prince came back, he saw the bloody carpet, but didn't see the baby. The dog licked the blood in his mouth and looked at him happily. The prince was furious and pulled out a knife and stabbed the dog in the abdomen. The dog screamed and woke up the baby sleeping under the bloody blanket. At this moment, the prince found a dead wolf lying in the corner. It turns out that Gellert killed the wolf to protect his young master.

This is a sad story. If the prince had been rational and carefully analyzed the whole story, he would not have killed his beloved dog by mistake, which would make him regret for life. As the story says, we often encounter various unexpected situations in real life. At this time, emotional management began to play a role. If we can't control the anger or sadness at that time, things will often get worse; But if we can calm down and wait for the gas to subside before dealing with it, we will also find that the so-called problems or contradictions are actually nothing more than that. Therefore, learn to control your irritable mood, don't be trapped by selfishness, and work hard. Welcome things calmly with ... No matter what you expect or can't do, you should face it calmly, don't worry, don't panic. Only in this way can we create a new future.

In fact, in the process of controlling your emotions, empathy is a more effective method. Many times, different people have different views on the same thing. As "a thousand readers have a thousand Hamlets". For the same glass of water, optimists will feel "Ha, there is still half a glass of water", while pessimists will feel "Oh, there is only half a glass of water". The results are quite different. Optimists drink water with relish, while pessimists drink water without taste. The same is true of interpersonal relationships. It is inevitable that there will be contradictions between friends, and even serious disputes will arise, because everyone feels that their own is the most reasonable. In this case, if one side can be a little more tolerant and objectively evaluate this matter from the other side's point of view, it will also be found that the other side is also very reasonable. This can avoid a lot of unnecessary troubles and will not destroy the feelings between friends.

I believe everyone must have heard the story of a blind man, a deaf man and two able-bodied people crossing the bridge. Why did the blind and deaf finally cross the bridge, but a healthy person fell into the abyss? Isn't a person with normal hearing and vision worse than the blind and deaf? This involves the problem of mentality. Blind eyes can't see, Fuguishan Gao Qiao risks, so he calmly climbed the rope; The deaf can't hear, so he can't smell the roar under his feet, and his fear is relatively reduced; A healthy person who has crossed the bridge thinks that he has crossed the bridge. What does Wei Feng have to do with him? What does the rapids have to do with him? So he just pays attention to stand firm and cross the bridge smoothly. Many times, success is like catching an iron rope. The reason for failure is not because of low IQ or weak strength, but because of fear of the environment and the surrounding momentum. William james, the most outstanding professor of psychology at Harvard University, once wrote six sentences: "If you care enough about a certain result, you will certainly accomplish it;" If you want to do it well, do it well; You expect to get rich, and you will get rich; If you want to learn, you must be knowledgeable. Only in this way can you really look forward to these things and do them wholeheartedly, instead of wasting a lot of time thinking about other trivial things. "This is the power to build a good attitude. If you can do this, why worry about unhappy life?

Master Carnegie said that "85% of a person's success comes from his interpersonal relationship". In interpersonal relationships, the management and control of emotions undoubtedly account for a considerable proportion. So learn to control your emotions and keep your mind at peace. And high emotional intelligence is a catalyst for a better life. In this way, we can grasp life and enjoy it.