Argumentative paper: "Let children grow up freely"
Long ago, wolves and dogs were brothers of the same family. But later, due to different personalities, dogs could not stand the harsh living environment of nature and were willing to accept human training; The wolf is proud. In order to maintain their dignity of eating meat, they would rather live in a harsh environment than give up their freedom like dogs and live an omnivorous life with human beings. As a result, two animal groups with similar looks and different personalities appeared in the animal kingdom-wolves and dogs. Wolves and dogs belong to the same family, but because of their different interests, they have embarked on different life paths and belong to hostile camps.
One day, a wolf who was so hungry that he was only skin and bones met a strong lost dog in the forest. The wolf thought of the dog's "betrayal" and hunger, and wanted to rush to attack the dog and tear it up. But at this time, he has lost his head and rushed out. Not only is there no chance of winning, but he may even take his own life. So the wolf pretended to be very gentle and greeted the dog and said, "Brother Dog, I haven't seen you for a few days. You are getting fat. "
Seeing the wolf's bony and humble appearance, the dog also relaxed his vigilance and began to chat with the wolf: "Really?" Brother, hunting seems to be often empty these days! Otherwise ... "
The wolf nodded naturally and said, "Yes. How can I compare with your high official, brother! I've been lucky recently! ……"
The dog said, "You are hopeless. Why do you have to be obsessed with hunting? " As a brother and sister, I am willing to help you find a job with human beings, and ensure that you are treated like me, eat well, drink well, play well and sleep well every day! "
The wolf said, "I'm afraid I'm not used to it!" " Besides, humans have a problem with me. "
The dog said, "don't worry about this." I am favored by human beings! They don't even have time to hurt me. As long as I mention it to them, they will definitely give face. After all, I am their gatekeeper. As long as you are willing to leave the forest wasteland, I promise to let mankind treat you well. You see, it is your spineless spirit that is fighting against human beings. As a result, you can only hide in the forest wasteland and live a very poor life like a rogue beggar. Either you get a meal with your blood or you are starving. It is said that many brothers starve to death every year. Alas, you are poor. Follow me! Make sure your destiny changes from now on! "
The wolf said, "I know nothing but hunting." What can I do to find humans? "
The dog said, "Look, look, when you hunt, you are so confident that you dare to shoot tigers. Why are you so inferior now? " When you are human, you will do nothing like me. Whenever you meet someone begging with a stick, you will try your best to drive them away. When you meet your master, you will shake your head and tail. In human terms, you will kiss up to your master and please him. This is what you do every day. You don't have to go through the wind and rain, you don't have to sleep in the wind and starve, and the rewards you get are definitely much richer than those you get from hunting. All kinds of leftovers, pig bones and chicken bones are cooked, nutritious and healthy, and prolong life. When the master is happy, he will hug you and caress you ... "
Before the dog finished speaking, the wolf was moved to cry. Although there are some estrangements between brothers at ordinary times, after all, a friend in need is a friend indeed, and the dog brothers have sincerely pointed out a bright and happy road for themselves. The wolf quickly said "thank you" and asked the dog to take it to humans for "acceptance and reuse".
Just as the dog was about to take the wolf to meet the new owner, the wolf found that the dog's neck was "injured". The wolf realized that living with humans may not be as beautiful as the dog said, otherwise, how could there be a wound on the dog's neck? So the wolf couldn't help asking the dog curiously, "Why is there a scar on your neck?"
The dog said, "this is not a scar, just a little hair!" " "
The wolf said, "No? I think it's like a rope injury. "
The dog smiled: "You are so suspicious. This is not a scar. Just wearing the traces left by the collar. "
The wolf said, "Do you often wear a collar around your neck?"
The dog said, "Not often, but at home, my master lets me wear it."
The wolf said, "You can't run around freely with a collar on?"
"Not always," said the dog. But if you eat human food, you will be controlled by human beings. What does this little grievance have to do with it? "
The wolf said, "I think it has a lot to do with it." I don't want all your meals, even if it is a baby, I would rather not have such a price. " The wolf said and ran, into the depths of the big forest.
This is the proud wolf! It would rather starve and fight bloody battles in nature than sacrifice its freedom for "delicious" and shake its head and tail to its owner.
Wolves love freedom so much, so do humans. Especially in the growth stage of children, they are full of longing for freedom. However, many of our children are not free in life.
In the environment of exam-oriented education. Everything is centered on exams, and many parents have designed the future life path for their children almost from the day they are born. In the process of growing up, children can only move forward along this road, and they can't have the idea of "non-discrimination".
However, children naturally love freedom, and their desire for freedom is no less than their respect for their own lives. A poet put it well: "Life is precious, but love is more expensive. If you are free, you can throw both. " With the growth of children's age, especially after puberty, with the awakening of self-awareness, they will fight for their own freedom and begin to resist the life path designed by their parents. Of course, such a move will cause parents' dissatisfaction and further restrict them everywhere. A struggle between freedom and anti-freedom began.
In this regard, the famous educator Sun Yunxiao said: "China's parents are trying to brew their children's tragic fate and race against time to create their children's growth troubles. In fact, our parents are fighting against themselves and destroying their goals with their own struggles. " When parents restrict their children's freedom, they are actually creating their own distance, which sometimes leads to the intensification of the struggle between "control" and "anti-control".
A 15 junior high school girl is particularly annoyed that her parents have always treated her as a child and restricted her freedom. She said that her parents took care of her like a reform-through-labour prisoner, sometimes even tighter than watching a reform-through-labour prisoner. Everything she did was arranged by her parents. She feels like a toy and has no freedom at all. Even her parents have to interfere with what she eats, what she wears, how long she reads, how long she does her homework, how long she practices guzheng, how long she watches TV, what time she goes to bed, what time she gets up, and even keeps a diary ... What makes her feel uncomfortable is that the school is opposite, and her parents insist on picking her up every day, which makes her feel uncomfortable.
What happened to this girl reminds us of a wolf who was caught in a cage by mistake. In the cage, the wolf's eyes drooped and turned a blind eye to the tourists. Wolves are neither arrogant nor tired, nor bluffing. They refuse to be content with the status quo, and even disdain to beg. Although trapped in a cage, its elastic footsteps and energetic muscles always give people a forward rhythm and impulse; It moves fast in the cage, hits the iron fence and turns around, which makes people feel that it is always ready to rush out of the cage and will never stop until it returns to the mountains. Although they are safe and can eat well without hard work, they yearn for the free life before.
Children are at a young and active stage, and their desire for freedom is their nature. No matter how tightly their parents control them, they will try their best to break through all kinds of restrictions, just like wolves in cages. No matter what you give them, they will always be restless. Only the free world is the soil for the survival of the strong. For freedom, wolves would rather fight and live in a dangerous situation than enjoy "wealth restricted by freedom" Because wolves are strong and dare to challenge everything freely. Our parents should give their children more free space if they want to train them to be strong in life.
How to educate children
People should be educated in three aspects in their life, namely, family education, school education and social education. As the earliest and most influential basic form of education in life, family education plays a very important role in the growth of the younger generation, which is irreplaceable by school education.
With the advent of the era of knowledge economy, the fission effect of science and technology and the competition of market economy, the speed of knowledge renewal is accelerating, and our family education is facing great challenges. The vast majority of parents have no direct connection with education for professional and work reasons. The education of children is mostly based on feelings and experience, and the methods of educating children are improper. Children are generally grumpy, domineering, lack of independent opinions and weak willpower. How to solve this situation? The author thinks that the following methods should be taken to make children grow up healthily and happily:
First, eliminate the fear caused by parents to their children.
The junior high school stage is the stage when children "cross the hurdle". Due to various reasons, their academic performance has declined, and their parents are anxious and impetuous. There is opposition between children and parents. At this time, parents should calm down and learn to wait patiently for their children's growth. Some experts said: "Children have a stronger desire to avoid failure than to strive for success. In order to prevent the smallest possible failure, I would rather reduce my efforts. " This is one of the important reasons why parents' fear makes their children lose their initiative. I hope parents don't "try" or even suffer when they see their children's poor grades, so as not to lose confidence in their children. Parents should ask their children about their learning from the process, which is more scientific and effective than asking the results.
Second, build children's self-confidence
The inventor Edison had a strong thirst for knowledge when he was a child, and he liked to trace back to the source. He asked the teacher why "2+2 equals 4", so he caused a big disaster. He has only been in school for three months and was ordered to drop out. His mother was very sad and determined to educate her son personally, build up self-confidence, teach him liberal arts and chemistry, and cultivate his habit of loving learning and science. Edison's thirst for knowledge was further stimulated. The germ of "genius" grew unconsciously and eventually became a world-famous inventor. It can be seen that success comes from self-confidence, the establishment of self-confidence and the common sense of people around you. Fathers don't appreciate their children. Where does the child's self-confidence come from? Edison's mother didn't appreciate her son, so there wouldn't be today's inventor Edison. Parents should use a magnifying glass to discover their children's bright spots and help them build confidence in overcoming difficulties. When children need help, parents should master a certain degree of help, never go beyond it, and leave room. For example, if a child asks how to write a word, some parents will report it casually, which is the most labor-saving, but it is unacceptable. When children ask how to write a word, it is better to encourage them to "can't you look it up in the dictionary?" Check it first, and then tell your father (mother). With such guidance, children will be happy to look up the dictionary. This not only saves parents a lot of time, but also cultivates children's ability to acquire knowledge by themselves. And this ability is very important in a person's life. Only by letting children jump and succeed through their own efforts can children feel the joy of success and build their self-confidence.
Third, grow up with your children and be their bosom friends.
With the progress of society and the rapid development of science and technology, people have to learn more and more new things. As parents, we should always embody the spirit of seeking knowledge and making progress and set an example for our children. "Mom and Dad are also learning and making progress!" Let children understand that learning new knowledge and continuous progress are accompanied by life. Secondly, through communication with children, we should try our best to shorten the distance from their hearts, listen to their unintentional words, truly understand our children and educate them to grow up healthily.
When educating children, don't use insulting language such as "worthless" and "stupid", and don't sneer at children in an ironic tone, which will obliterate their self-confidence, cause great psychological pressure on them and hinder their growth and progress.
"Let the children be productive" is the eternal demand of parents. There are many ways to educate children. Children's personal situation, family environment and parents' quality are all important factors. Family education should effectively cooperate with school education to achieve the goal of educating students well and let children grow up happily and healthily.
In the process of children's growth, the factor of love is very important. However, when love loses its rationality or limit, love for children becomes extreme love, which often leads to obstacles in children's physical and mental development and distortion of mind, which has a negative impact on children's future life development. ..
The extreme performance of loving children is:
1, think that as long as children's material needs are met infinitely, they love children. In fact, this is an ignorant love. Children's need for love is not only material, but more importantly spiritual. In life, some parents only pay attention to supplementing their children with various nutrients, but ignore the cultivation of their good moral behavior habits and social adaptability. Some parents buy many books or computers for their children, but they don't correctly guide their children to read or use computers. They don't understand that spiritual encouragement, praise, affirmation and necessary psychological support for their children are all love. However, this kind of spiritual love is more important for their growth.
2. Parents overprotect their children and do a lot of things for their children, which virtually deprives them of the opportunity to develop their own abilities and reduces their self-reliance and self-confidence. This kind of love limits children's self-development and has a negative impact on their independent social life in the future.
3, the requirements for children are too harsh, often criticized, and even corporal punishment of children. Some parents really love their children, but they mistakenly think that "a dutiful son is born under the stick" and "a soldier who defeats others without fighting". Whenever the child's performance is different from the parents' imagination, the problem is solved by beating and cursing, which often causes irreparable trauma to the child's physical and mental development. This kind of love does not bring joy to children, but pain. This kind of ambitious love often forms opposite emotions or emotions-hate, hate for parents, others, society and even oneself. Parents should fully affirm their children's advantages and cultivate their self-confidence, instead of criticizing, accusing or punishing them when they find problems, so that their children can get better development.
I remember a foreign scientist said, "Parents are children's first school". Indeed, parents' education is accompanied by children's growth, and whether education is proper or not will directly affect children's future. Therefore, family education is particularly important and an essential subject. "I wish my children success" is the common wish of parents. Every parent wants to train their children to be useful talents for the country and society in the future, which requires us to make efforts in this regard as parents.
About "How to educate children well?" It has always been a topic of discussion among parents. On the one hand, it is the concern of society and schools, and there are various ways to educate children. The educational methods for each child are not uniform and should vary from person to person. Among them, there is a lot of learning. Educating children should take corresponding measures according to their personality characteristics, hobbies and behavior habits, so as to achieve good results.
To educate children, we should start from five aspects: morality, intelligence, physique, beauty and goodness, which is quality education. First, parents should educate their children to be good children with good moral character from an early age. They can give some examples or guide their children to tell themselves to be like characters in life by watching TV and cartoons.
Second, parents should pay more attention to their children's academic performance at ordinary times, so that he can feel the concern of adults for his study, so that he will feel bored. In addition, parents and children should set a goal with clear rewards and punishments. To achieve this goal, parents should abide by the "contract" and give corresponding rewards. If they don't meet the standard, parents should not blame and beat their children, which should be encouraged. Parents should teach their children to develop the good habit of "asking questions without shame", think independently, be good at analyzing difficult problems and other good reading habits, and teach them to master things flexibly instead of memorizing them. The learning method of "reading by rote" is not feasible, and it takes a lot of time, but the effect is average. For example, some children copied new words and wrote a row, but after a while he still couldn't write them. This method is too "dead"
Third, "health is wealth". Parents should teach their children to take part in physical exercise, get up early and go to bed early, play basketball and run at ordinary times, which is good for their health.
Fourth, parents should educate their children to cultivate good children with good hearts from an early age, do more good deeds, be polite to others, and teach them how to treat others.
In addition, parents' words and deeds have a great influence on their children and should be paid attention to by parents. They should speak appropriately and do things seriously, set up a good image for their children, tell them some principles of being a man, arrange things for their children at home at ordinary times, do their own things well, and finish what they did that day, so as to make a timetable for their children and let them develop good living habits.
In short, there are many ways to educate children, which requires us as parents to be caring, careful, careful and patient. I believe that as long as our parents can do this, coupled with the concern of the school and society, our children will certainly become useful talents for the country and society in the future.
Problems that should be paid attention to in preschool education;
After three years of development, children enter preschool, which is a very important period in one's life. Many basic abilities of people are formed at this age, such as oral English, basic movements and some living habits, and sex is also initially formed at this age. Therefore, the education and psychological care in this period can not be ignored. Early education includes four aspects: physique, intelligence, morality and beauty.
Physical education is the primary task of early education. Cultivate children's good living habits and independent living ability, and develop their basic movements, such as walking, running, jumping, crawling and crawling. To accomplish these tasks, it is not enough to have health care and nutrition conservation. It is also necessary to carry out certain sports activities and master certain skills, so that children's bones, muscles and various organs can be exercised and their adaptability and various functions can be improved.
Intellectual education: It is not important to impart advanced scientific knowledge in early intellectual education, but to develop children's intelligence, that is, to develop children's attention, observation, memory, thinking imagination and oral expression ability. Pre-school intellectual education is to lay the foundation for future education. If you miss this period of time, the later study will be very difficult or even irreparable, such as oral English. If a person has no chance to practice oral English before school, even if he spends a lot of energy in adulthood, he can't reach the normal oral English level. It should be prepared from the aspects of cultivating children's intelligence, study habits and interest in learning, rather than taking how many words they know and how many books they have learned as the standard of children's intelligence.
Moral education: refers to the moral education for children. There are three factors in the formation of people's moral character, namely, their understanding of moral character, emotion and behavior. Preschool children's understanding of things is relatively low, and many abstract truths are incomprehensible. They can only understand relatively straightforward and simple standards of right and wrong, and can cultivate some initial behavior habits of treating people, such as politeness, kindness and honesty. Children are imitative, and many things in society will unconsciously affect them. If you don't take the initiative to educate, children will naturally learn many bad behavior habits. Therefore, moral education depends on adults to infiltrate the educational content into children's whole life in detail, and preaching and preaching alone is by no means effective.
Aesthetic education: refers to the aesthetic education of children. There are many natural phenomena and social phenomena in life that can make people feel beauty, and some art forms are the result of refining and sublimating these beautiful contents. Aesthetic education for children is to cultivate them to consciously experience the beauty in life, teach them the skills to express their feelings about beauty initially, and even create something. The artistic form is vivid and vivid, and it is mostly described by sound, color or gesture, which conforms to the psychological characteristics of preschool children. Therefore, art forms can attract children's attention and interest, and are easily influenced and edified by art, such as songs, music, dances, poems, artists and literary works. All children have little knowledge and experience, low level of understanding and appreciation, and are not mature physically, so they can only choose those works that are easy to understand.
The environment around us, as well as people's behavior and language, have a profound impact on cultivating children's aesthetic feeling. Therefore, it is very important to beautify the kindergarten and family environment, and the manners, behaviors and clothes of adults are very important.
Preschool children should pay attention to psychological characteristics in psychological nursing. At this time, children's abstract thinking has emerged and they can understand the abstract concepts of numbers; Creative imagination has also emerged, and individual children can draw very novel pictures and make up interesting stories. Therefore, no matter the family living environment or social living environment, we should create a good atmosphere for children, let them feel the cultivation of truth, goodness and beauty from their daily lives, cultivate their good qualities through listening, and make their psychology develop in a healthy, upward and friendly environment. In psychological care, we should pay great attention to methods and avoid using rude and simple reprimands on children, which will easily make children feel inferior; You can't indulge and indulge, which will make children feel self-righteous and self-righteous. Positive guidance and persuasion methods should be adopted, such as cultivating children's hard-working and helpful character through labor, so that children can feel the happiness after work and the happiness after helping others psychologically. In children's psychological care, we should also pay attention to letting nature take its course and closely combine it with children's education and health care. Proper nursing can make children's education get twice the result with half the effort.