But everyone seems to have overlooked a problem, that is, dowry. It is mentioned in The Book of Songs: I will bribe you to move. It means that you came by car and I went to your house with my dowry, describing the scene of a patriotic woman getting married at that time.
It can be seen that the custom of dowry has existed since ancient times. The dowry of ordinary families is generally clothes, bedding, furniture and other daily necessities, and wealthy families will also add land, shops, deeds and so on.
Moreover, it is also recorded in Hengshui County Records: in the rich family, there are people who marry with a hundred gold. This past and the past are allowed, and it is not a big deal. After marriage, the cost of the male family is one, and the cost of the female family is nine.
It can be seen that in ancient times, in a marriage, the dowry of the woman was far more than the bride price of the man. Of course, ancient is ancient and modern is modern. We can't treat modern marriage completely according to the etiquette of the ancients. After all, the background is different.
So, when a daughter gets married, there is no need to consider the dowry at all? Of course not. Most families still prepare dowry for their daughters, but the amount of dowry has become a difficult problem.
For example, Pink is worried about the dowry as the wedding approaches. It turned out that the man's family gave her 300 thousand as a bride price, while her parents only prepared several sets of clothes and six quilts for her as a dowry.
If the family really has no money, forget it, but it is clear that the husband's family just gave 300 thousand, and the parents of the money are not going to let her take it back. Even if I take out a third of my dowry, Xiao Fen won't have any opinions in her heart, but several sets of clothes and quilts are too petty.
So Xiao fen went to her mother to discuss whether she could give more dowry. After all, the husband's family has given so many colorful gifts, and their family may be looked down upon after marriage. But her mother not only didn't miss her, but also said that her elbow was turned outwards.
Because the bride price wedding was postponed for three years!
Xiao fen is 29 years old this year. She has been in love with her boyfriend awei for five years. Five years is neither long nor short. The reason why they put off getting married for five years is entirely because of Pink's mother.
Three years ago, when the two of them put forward the idea of getting married, Xiaofen's mother asked for a bride price of 300,000 yuan. But at that time, they had just worked and awei's family was not particularly rich. How could they come up with 300,000 yuan at once?
So awei and Xiao Fen's mother discussed whether they could lower the requirements of some bride price. After all, their family just bought a house and now they really can't afford so much money.
But Xiao fen's mother completely ignored the actual situation of their family. Instead, she said, "There are many people who want to marry my daughter. If you can't get the bride price, someone else can. You want me to lower my requirements, no way! "
Xiao Fen and awei really love each other, and no one wants to break up for the bride price, so the problem of getting married lasted for three years.
In the past three years, they scrimped and saved, and together with some money saved by awei's parents, they finally made up 300,000 yuan. This relieved Xiaofen's mother and agreed to marry her daughter to him.
I should have married Meimei, but I got into trouble on the dowry issue. In Xiao Fen's heart, her husband's family gave her a bride price of 300,000 yuan, and her mother had to prepare a decent dowry for her anyway, but I didn't expect all dowry items to add up to no more than 5,000 yuan.
Under Xiao fen's repeated questioning, her mother told the truth It turns out that her brother belongs to the kind of "idle". Although he worked for many years, he didn't save a penny. Xiao fen's bride price money mother intends to save to buy a wedding room for her brother.
Finally, there is no way. Seeing that the wedding day was coming, Xiaofen had to get married, so she took a small dowry and married awei.
How to balance bride price and dowry?
No matter for what purpose, it is wrong for Xiaofen's mother to exchange Xiaofen's happiness for her son's happiness. The husband's family gave his daughter a bride price of 300 thousand, but her daughter only gave him a dowry of 5 thousand, which could not be justified.
So, how to balance the bride price and dowry?
First of all, the woman's family should not take it for granted and set the amount of the bride price as "biting the price" without looking at the actual situation of the man's family. As a married daughter, you should consider your daughter's married life. Excessive bride price will inevitably leave a bad impression on her husband's family.
Secondly, the amount of dowry depends on the bride price given by the man. If the bride's family accepts the bride price, it is best to give the same amount. If there are difficulties, it should not be less than half of the bride price.