At lunch, my mother got a call from my big cousin, saying that after my uncle was taken to the hospital, the doctor's opinion was that no treatment was needed. My mother judged that my uncle might not make it this time. I said to my mother, "You don't have to go back. I'll do the nucleic acid right away and go back to see my uncle tomorrow. If my uncle is all right, go back and meet him. If it really doesn't work, go back and see my uncle for the last time. " Then I took a nap in bed according to my schedule. My mother's crying woke me up. I know my uncle has left. 1 1 On the last day of the month, at 2: 40 pm, I was 83 years old.
0 1 My uncle died and my aunt didn't cry.
Where are you going? How can you stop crying? My sister called me to persuade my mother not to go back. She was worried that her mother could not bear the grief of her uncle's death. She repeatedly told her mother "don't cry" on the phone, but her mother wanted to see her uncle one last time anyway. I believe that tears can dispel the pain. I would rather let her cry happily and say goodbye to her uncle with a crying ceremony. No matter what kind of farewell, no ceremony is sad.
I cried because I missed it, because I regretted it, because I lost an era. ...
I regret that my eldest cousin didn't ask my mother to video with my uncle with her mobile phone when she called. At least, I should let my big cousin tell my uncle that I want to go back and let my uncle know how much I care about him. I also thought about it, but I was worried about my uncle's sensitivity. But I went back, because I knew he was dying, and I didn't say anything. No matter how much I believe in the existence of the soul, I hope my uncle will leave with my love for him.
However, I am more worried about menstruation. No matter what the situation, menstruation is distressing: I am worried that menstruation will be too hard when my uncle is around, and menstruation will be too lonely when my uncle is not around. I don't know how sad and crying thin aunt will be. A few years ago, my uncle died, and I didn't go home because I was too busy at work. According to my mother, menstruation, which is never sad, is very sad. It is hard for me to imagine how difficult and painful it will be for a couple who have lived together for nearly 60 years to leave the meeting.
But when my mother and I sat in the car all day and came to my uncle's spirit to cry, my aunt came out and said to me, "Liangyu, don't cry!" " Your uncle left peacefully. "
As the old saying goes, there is no dutiful son before a long bed. There is always a dutiful son before my uncle's bed. However, these "dutiful sons" have never served my uncle. It is always my aunt who waits on my uncle.
Eight years ago, my uncle was lying in bed because of a stroke, during which he had gallstone surgery. I can't remember how many times I went to the hospital. Almost every time I recover from a critical illness, my aunt takes care of me for a lifetime.
My aunt is in poor health, although she is six years younger than my uncle. The hospital diagnosed her with diabetes, cancer and knee synovitis. For a time, my aunt supported her body with a small bench with crutches. Although the twins' cousins are not far from their parents' homes and they often come back, it is always my aunt who takes care of my uncle's life every day.
No matter spring, summer, autumn and winter, my aunt scrubs my uncle's body, feeds him and helps him get out of the wheelchair in bunk bed every day. Besides, my aunt never asked anyone to take care of my uncle, whether she lived with my cousin's sister-in-law or later with my cousin's family. For eight years, she had to wash clothes, cook, clean and take care of the vegetable garden, and she never got bored. Even the doctors and nurses in the hospital lamented that a rural old man had not smelled anything after lying in bed for several years, and it was difficult for even professional nurses to take care of him so thoughtfully. My aunt said, "I only have one wish, that is, your uncle walks in front of me." If I die before him, no one can take care of him. "
We all lamented how menstruation's body suffered so much pain and so much physical strength. My aunt herself is very calm. She said what the doctor said was scary. I never think about these things. Many diseases are scaring themselves. As for life and death, menstruation seems indifferent. Maybe my uncle left before her just to satisfy her wish, so we can't see her sadness.
On February 3, 65438, at 4 o'clock in the morning, the Taoist priest began to chant. I didn't recognize half of the lyrics except the money from the dutiful son. At 5 o'clock, the funeral was held in 18, and dozens of cars followed my uncle's hearse. I wonder if there is anyone to accompany my aunt. I looked back at her, and she was as calm as ever, watching my uncle's coffin leave without tears.
Uncle has nothing but many people.
20 16 Spring Festival
In fact, it is difficult for me to describe my uncle with such words as "contribution", "diligence" and "kindness". My uncle has made no special contribution to the whole family. Even when transplanting rice in the field, he is gentle, spotless, unhurried and even looks a little cold.
If there is one word to describe my uncle's fate, it must be "people". I often tell people that there is nothing in my uncle's house, but there are many people.
My uncle has seven children, a son and six daughters. Because the uncle of these seven children has fourteen children; Catch up with the one-child era, only my eldest cousin has two children, and my uncle has eight grandchildren, four of whom are married, so my uncle has twelve grandchildren; At present, the married grandchildren have added five great-grandchildren to their uncles. In this way, there are thirty-one descendants passed down by my uncle.
But more than that, our family belongs to the matriarchal family, with my grandmother as the core. My uncle's three sisters, that is, my menstruation, my mother and my aunt, have always given birth to seven children, and these seven nephews have also formed a considerable lineup, which also revolves around my uncle.
More than that, it seems that uncle's position in the family is not only established by grandparents' children, but also includes two branches of grandma's family: one is grandma's brother, who is my uncle. When he was young, he drove a ferry on the Yangtze River and gave birth to two sons and a daughter. My uncle died in a ship fire, and there are at least fifteen grandchildren here, even my mother can't remember clearly; The other is that my grandmother's sister is my aunt, because during the war, my aunt went out to be a soldier when she was very young, and her whereabouts are unknown. My aunt waited half her life with her only daughter, who gave birth to six grandchildren. These two branches are at the top of the stone, and we are separated by a river.
When I was young, I often visited my mother's cousin's house, and I also saw my uncle, grandfather and aunt take their descendants to visit my grandmother's house. There seems to be some kind of established ceremony in the way of visiting, which is not necessarily a Chinese New Year holiday, but we will take some time out to stay with relatives every year during the slack season. We call it "visiting relatives".
It feels great to "visit relatives". I like the fresh affection that my aunt and grandmother brought their cousins to live in. My aunt and grandmother are alike, and my cousin and cousin are both beautiful. The feeling of being half-baked always makes me hope to perform better in front of them and intercept some of their good memories.
What impressed me most was that he would bring us delicious fried dough sticks every time he came. He asked us to sit down and distribute them one by one. Time passed, and I still vaguely remember my uncle's voice and expression. I believe that all of us sitting at the table are swallowing while waiting for my uncle to send out fried dough sticks. I remember my uncle and grandfather staring at me and calling my mother's name "Xiaodong" every time, and I would be a little shy and say "I'm not Xiaodong." Then my uncle and grandfather said with satisfaction, "I think you look like Xiaodong." From then on, I was very clear, because I looked too much like my mother and was deeply loved by my grandmother's relatives, including my uncle.
Relatives usually come to grandma's house. As long as they come, we will all get together. At that time, people were still clear, but it is estimated that every time relatives go out, they have to figure out how many things they need to bring before they can distribute them. Generally, it is mainly based on eating, and the feeling of eating together is also very tasty. This is also a standard content of "visiting relatives".
Years are long, and things are different. One by one, our children and grandchildren have left their hometowns to make a living in various places and become guests from all over the world. Maybe one day we meet on the road, and some people may not recognize each other. We are so busy that we have no time to visit our relatives. We are so busy that we can't remember the last time our relatives came to live with us. We are too busy to remember that there are so many relatives in this world that we can go to Sanbaotang for anything.
However, no matter how the world changes, my uncle's family will always leave, and I can't tell why. It seems to be a habit from generation to generation, from uncle to cousin, from aunt to menstruation, to cousins and cousins; From cousins, cousins, cousins to cousins ... generation after generation, my uncle's house is always visited.
It seems that as long as my uncle is here, my grandmother's clan will not be interrupted. A world that seems to have never been turbulent and carries the old days has always existed. As long as I see my uncle, I can feel the warmth of those old days. As long as I ask about the names, ages, experiences and various relationships of those relatives, my mother says that no one can make it clear except my uncle.
Those old days have nothing to do with wealth, gain and loss, honor and disgrace, but a natural existence, because of my uncle. Therefore, when my uncle died, I felt a sense of loss that the world was taken away by him.
03? My uncle never worries, and everything is "whatever you want"
I really can't tell you how hard my uncle works and how worried he is about his children. He was spoiled by others almost all his life. When he was a child, he had four brothers and sisters. He is the only male. My grandfather treats me equally, but my grandmother and her mother are particularly patriarchal and never let my uncle work. When my uncle became an adult, his grandparents helped him take care of the children, and he hardly had to worry about these; After grandparents died, there were three sisters, especially aunts, who were very concerned about their uncles and often took them to the city to watch plays and recuperate. When he is really old and sick, not only his aunt takes care of him, but also his cousins often go back. Even his seven nephews go back to visit him and his aunt every year.
Well, Xiao Yan should be the biggest contributor in the family with grandma as the core. He likes to worry, and he is also the only one in his generation who left the countryside and tried to pull us out one by one. Therefore, several of our cousins lived and grew up in houses in Xiao Yan, and Xiao Yan is like a bridge from the countryside to the city. Mother may be the closest of their sisters. Despite hardships, she is strong and unyielding, and has become an umbrella for children, nephews and nieces. So cousins also like to be with their mothers. Menstruation likes us. She is weak and doesn't talk much, but the gentleness of menstruation is the greatest tolerance. We never say hello when we go to the menstrual home to eat and drink Lazar. It is because my uncle was a captain when he was young, and he was aggressive in the village, and no one dared to bully us. My uncle has been restless and can't say anything special to this big family, but it seems a bit puzzling that relatives from far and near will surround him.
My uncle studied in a private school and went to school after liberation. He writes beautifully and loves to listen to opera. He also told me that he is the best in Beijing opera of all kinds. He is an accountant in our village. After all, he is a cultured person, but he never seems to express his opinions on too many things, and things at home are just like "doing what you want".
Including two children who died young, my uncle gave birth to nine children before and after, but even the names of the children were not given. Coincidentally, my uncle's third child is the same age as ours, and my sister is called "the third child". Next, my uncle's fourth and fifth children are called "fourth" and "fifth". The last pair of twins was on my uncle's 37th birthday (September 17th of the lunar calendar).
Almost all the children's scientific names are given by their mothers and aunts, and my uncle neither worries nor interferes. Only when I was in primary school at the age of 7, my uncle asked me to give my cousin a scientific name, which was the only time he "interfered" with the child's name. Here's the thing:
Because I don't want to be surnamed Li with my father, I need a scientific name named Zheng with my grandmother. Our family chose my grandmother's surname and my grandfather's pie according to the names of my uncle and mother's generation and my first cousin. My first cousin's name is Zheng Xianjun, which was named by my mother. I thought it sounded good, so I asked a cousin, "I want my mother's name." Mother said, "You can't give me the name my sister has already called. Let's give you another name. "
"I'll do it myself", so I just looked it up in the dictionary and gave myself a name. I think the word "ling" sounds good and interesting, so I call it "Zheng Xianling". My cousin is just one year younger than me, because there happened to be a primary school in the village that day, and it was at the door of my uncle's house. My cousin plans to go to school with me. My uncle said, "You might as well name your sister." Because I haven't been to kindergarten or studied Pinyin, all the words I know are dialect pronunciations, so I named my cousin Zheng Xianqiong (our dialect pronunciations) according to the radicals and pronunciations of my own name.
My uncle's only son's real name is "Zhao", and my sister is the same age as him. When they were at school, the names "red and expert" were popular, so my aunt named them "Yongzhong" and "Yonghong" respectively. The last four five six seven didn't follow us. By school time, single names were popular all over the country, and girls took boys' names. Except for Wuzi, who took a girl's name with his grandfather, the other four, six and seven took single names: Zheng Zhou, Zheng Zhi and Zheng Yi.
It seems that only my mother and aunt are worried about us. They will encourage us to study and find jobs for us. My uncle is not too worried about his seven children and seven nephews. At that time, our teaching conditions were not good, and it was almost natural for cousins to study or abandon school. If they say they don't read, they won't read. I don't know if this has anything to do with my mother. Of the four brothers and sisters, my mother has read the most books and suffered the most. My uncle seems to be right about this, too. None of my uncle's seven children left the countryside after reading a book. Now every family is happy and well-fed.
My uncle doesn't seem to mind that I have been lying and studying at school. When others praised me in front of him, "I am still a college student?" He will proudly say, "Well, this is the only college student in our family!" " "He seems to know that I will suffer a lot when I leave my hometown. He told me very early: "people come into this world to suffer." You see, everyone's face is actually written with a word' bitter'. Eyebrows are the head of the grass, the bridge of the nose is the center of support, and the mouth is the word' mouth' under the word' bitter'. "
My uncle never worries. During his eight years in bed, the greatest significance of his life was to passively wait for news from his children and grandchildren: which grandson graduated from college, which grandson worked, and which grandson met whom. There are always too many things here, Sun Mantang. This great grandson will wait for the next one when he gets married, and wait for the next grandson when he is born ... When a person has no mobility, life is the only meaning.
04? My uncle's eyes are my "origin"
I once chatted with a psychological counselor, and she pointed out a flaw in my character brought by Born in a Family: "You always seem to want to conquer handsome and indifferent people. Is it related to your family and your father? "
The "handsome and indifferent" person I thought of within a second of looking down was not my father, but my uncle. Because when I was five years old, my father was persecuted and forced to leave with us. He was not very handsome.
My uncle is very handsome. My uncle is about 175, with heavy eyebrows, straight nose, thin face, clean skin and a scholarly face. Mom said that my uncle was like a player when he got married, and some people who went abroad would sigh that my uncle was good-looking. Many years later, I met a middle school classmate in Beijing. He also said: Your uncle is really beautiful. It was not until my uncle died that I met my uncle's sister-in-law, decades ago. She also boasted that "my brother-in-law is good-looking". Unfortunately, my uncle has no photos of him when he was young. 18 years ago, my mother went back to her hometown, and I took a photo with menstruation, Uncle Menstruation and my mother. By this time, my uncle was old.
My uncle is cold and taciturn. My uncle grew up in the countryside, experienced anxious times and crazy times, but rarely got excited. As far as I can remember, my uncle is always calm, even when he is angry, he speaks calmly.
My uncle's first marriage was the same as Li Mangeng and Hu in furong town. My uncle was divorced because my former aunt was the landlord's daughter. My uncle didn't join the party in the end, and he never complained. Later, my father was criticized and persecuted, my grandmother and mother cried bitterly, but my uncle was very calm.
Our house is built, and the bricks rolled by my mother are soaked in the rain. Several girls in the village used the drainage elevator to help my mother drain water, and my uncle found a pedal drainage car and left.
On a rainstorm day, the weather was as terrible as a disaster film, and even the trees with thick bowls were uprooted. My mother told us: "As long as you hear the movement of the house, you must run out." My uncle stood in front of us in a raincoat when it rained. He said slowly, "haven't you fallen yet?"
Once, my mother fought with a female member to help her menstruation. When the female members saw that they were indefensible and could not beat their mother, they cried and scolded. Her brother is going to help with a shovel. My uncle suddenly appeared and asked him, "What do you do first?" The young man stopped.
Another time, I picked day lilies with many people in an open space. The short man in the paper mill in the village dragged a trowel and proudly said that the day lily was green manure, which drove a group of people to flee everywhere. I didn't move, so he grabbed my basket. I followed, met Zhao Yunhua, and had some influence in the village. Zhao Yunhua said to Zhifang's short man, "Give her a basket!" I thought to myself: it's over, this vicious guy! Just then, a voice came from the western ridge: "What is it?" It turned out that my uncle fell from the sky. Zhao Yunhua immediately said to the paper mill dwarf, "Give her the basket back quickly!" " "
My uncle has always been so quiet, and there seems to be some mysterious majesty hidden deep in his cold eyes. He always uses indifferent language to solve difficulties. Even if he can't do anything, he won't fly into a rage. Even if there is something really happy, he will not be happy.
However, I grew up under the watchful eye of my uncle. As long as I can remember, I remember those eyes staring at me. They are not harsh, not gentle, not melancholy, nor sympathy, but love! My uncle's eyes have a special temperature. When a group of children go in and out, those eyes always follow me and make me happy under his gaze. Even though I refused to take my sister, my uncle threatened to throw me into the water. I stuck a needle in his arms, but I still felt the power of love in his trembling hands.
On one occasion, my uncle was hospitalized and went to the intensive care unit. Several of us went to the intensive care unit to talk to him. Later, my mother wanted to know if my uncle was awake, so she asked him, "Do you remember which ones were talking to you in the intensive care unit?" My uncle said, "Liangyu." My mother said that my uncle was partial to me, and even the twin cousins were more favored by my uncle because six of them looked like me.
The last time I saw my uncle was during the May Day holiday this year. My mother followed my aunt to my uncle's room. He was calm when he saw my mother. Then I went in and called "Uncle" (because my mother was with my grandparents, I called her "Uncle" since I was a child). My uncle's tears flowed out instantly. He tried to raise his head and called me "Liangyu!"
But, but my uncle has closed his eyes forever. Those eyes staring at me can't catch up with me anymore ... no, no, no, maybe not. Maybe my uncle's loving eyes are still staring at me somewhere. The next night when I came home, I saw my uncle in my dream, wearing a white shirt and a pair of light gray trousers, coming towards me from the mist. ...