We know that Ma Jiajue, the chief culprit of the "2.23 murder case" in Yunnan University, which sensationalized the whole country, embarked on the road of murder because of some minor contradictions with his classmates. This matter has to cause us to think. Therefore, in our life, study and work, we should face up to and solve the problems of being unwilling to communicate, not knowing how to communicate and not being good at communicating, shape our own image, treat interpersonal communication with a positive attitude and behavior, and establish harmonious interpersonal relationships.
We hope to get to know some communication knowledge by understanding the characteristics and principles of interpersonal communication. Combining these characteristics and principles, we can find suitable ways to cultivate our interpersonal skills and promote our own interpersonal relationships.
The meaning of interpersonal communication ability: social communication ability refers to the ability to properly handle the internal and external relations of the organization, including the ability to establish extensive contacts with the surrounding environment, absorb and transform external information, and correctly handle the upper, lower, left and right relations.
Types of interpersonal skills:
(1) The ability to express understanding refers to whether a person can express his inner thoughts and let others clearly understand his thoughts, and to understand others' expressions. A person's expressive ability can also directly prove his degree of social adaptation.
(2) Interpersonal integration ability indicates whether a person can experience credibility and loveliness. It has a lot to do with personality (such as extroversion and extroversion), but it is not entirely determined by it, but more of a psychological meaning.
(3) the ability to solve problems. At present, one of the weaknesses of the only child is strong dependence, poor ability to solve problems independently, and the disadvantages of exam-oriented education, which seriously affects students' communicative competence.
Interpersonal communication ability is the ability to live in harmony with others in a group. People are social people. It is hard to imagine what a person's life would be like without society and communication with others. If someone exists, he must associate with others. When we go out into the society, we will deal with all kinds of people. Whether you can get others' support and help in dealing with people will involve your own ability. I think we should cultivate our ability to deal with classmates, teachers, leaders and employees during our study in school. When talking with classmates, you can debate on different academic viewpoints and different understandings of social phenomena, so as to improve your thinking ability in the debate; Talking with teachers can exchange reading experience, sort out different ideas and understandings, and get inspiration from them; Talking with leaders can fully exchange their different views on the problem, and perhaps exercise themselves not to get stage fright in front of leaders; When dealing with employees, we can understand their working status and different mentality. Be good at communicating with people, and you will learn a lot from it that books can't.
First, interpersonal communication is an important way to maintain college students' physical and mental health.
(1) Interpersonal relationships affect the physical and mental state of college students.
Young college students are active in thinking and rich in feelings, and have a strong demand for interpersonal communication. Everyone is eager for sincere friendship, and everyone tries to gain friendship through interpersonal communication to meet their material and spiritual needs. However, in the face of new environment, new objects and tense study life, some students' psychological contradictions have intensified. At this time, positive interpersonal communication and good interpersonal relationship can make people feel happy, full of emotions, full of confidence and maintain an optimistic attitude towards life. Generally speaking, most students with good interpersonal relationships can maintain cheerful personality and warm and optimistic quality, so as to correctly understand and treat various practical problems, resolve various contradictions in their study and life, form positive and excellent quality, and quickly adapt to college life. On the contrary, if you lack positive interpersonal communication, can't treat yourself and others correctly, and are narrow-minded and short-sighted, it is easy to form great mental and psychological pressure, and psychological contradictions are difficult to resolve. Seriously, it may also lead to morbid psychology. If you don't dredge it in time, it may form a vicious circle and seriously affect your physical and mental health.
(2) Interpersonal communication affects college students' mood and emotional changes.
College students in the youth development period are in the golden age of their lives, and gradually mature in psychology, physiology and socialization. However, in this process, once negative factors are encountered, it will easily lead to negative emotions such as anxiety, tension, fear and anger, which will affect study and life. Practice has proved that friendly, harmonious and coordinated interpersonal communication is beneficial for college students to control and vent their bad emotions and emotions.
(3) Interpersonal communication affects the spiritual life of college students.
College students are filled with emotion. After intense study, they need to communicate with each other, discuss their ideals and lives, and tell their joys and sorrows. Interpersonal communication is the best way to realize this desire. Through interpersonal communication, we can meet the needs of college students for friendship, belonging and security, realize their value in the collective more deeply and vividly, and produce a sense of intimacy and attachment to the collective and others, so as to obtain a full and happy spiritual life and promote physical and mental health.
Second, interpersonal communication is an important guarantee for the growth of college students.
(1) Interpersonal communication is an important way to exchange information and acquire knowledge.
Modern society is an information society with unprecedented information and value. With the expansion of information, people have higher and higher requirements for owning and using all kinds of information. Through interpersonal communication, we can exchange information and achievements, enrich our experience, broaden our horizons, activate our thinking and enlighten our thoughts.
(2) International communication is an important means for individuals to know and improve themselves.
Confucius once said, "If you study alone without friends, you will be ignorant.". Interpersonal communication can help us improve our understanding of ourselves and others. In the process of interpersonal communication, we know each other from their manners. At the same time, I learned about myself from each other's reaction and evaluation. The wider and deeper the communication, the more complete the understanding of the other party and the deeper the understanding of yourself. Only by fully understanding others and deeply understanding yourself can we get others' understanding, sympathy, care and help and achieve self-improvement.
(3) Interpersonal communication is the need of collective growth and social development.
Interpersonal communication is a link to coordinate collective relations and form collective strength. And a good group can promote the formation of excellent personality quality of young students. Such as sense of justice, compassion and optimism. They all grew up in democratic, harmonious and friendly interpersonal relationships. Good interpersonal relationships can also enhance students' cohesion and become the most important educational force in the collective. Interpersonal communication is the interaction between people. Good interpersonal skills are positive, on the contrary, it is not conducive to the all-round and healthy development of individuals.
Third, college students' social skills are generally weak.
At the recent campus job fair held in colleges and universities, some business leaders said that employees' communication and communication skills have increasingly become the main driving force for enterprises to win in the market competition, so employers pay more attention to the "emotional intelligence" of job seekers when recruiting. Facing the recruitment conditions offered by employers, more and more college students feel the importance of interpersonal skills.
A recent survey on college students' occupational adaptability shows that 4 1.98% students think that the cultivation of interpersonal skills is "an educational content that is particularly helpful to them when looking for a job", which greatly exceeds the cultivation of professional ability (14.9%), basic knowledge and skills (17.5%) and psychological quality education (650) In response to "What qualities do you think you lack in choosing a job?" The proportion of choosing interpersonal skills is as high as 34.8%, ranking ahead of the ability to analyze and solve problems (28.8%), operational skills (25.9%) and basic knowledge (4.6%).
The survey on self-responsibility shows that more and more college students realize that the lack of interpersonal skills has become a "roadblock" on the road to job hunting. Good social psychological quality and interpersonal skills are not innate, but can only be obtained through continuous systematic training in the process of socialization. At present, the cultivation of interpersonal communication ability is just the weak link in education and teaching content.
Over the years, under the baton of the college entrance examination, students have paid too much attention to the pursuit of grades and neglected the cultivation of interpersonal skills and other qualities. After entering colleges and universities, there are few specialized systematic courses in schools. So many college students have high IQ, but low EQ, and often can't handle how to get along with others, communicate and communicate well. These are the abilities and qualities that enterprises value most when recruiting. Therefore, it is urgent to make up this course for college students.
The interpersonal skills of college students in China are below average. At the same time, it can be seen that ordinary people are more restrained and slow to adapt in the new environment. They are nervous in front of the opposite sex and non-peers, not bold enough, do not take the initiative to communicate, and even a few students are autistic. The lack of interpersonal skills and methods is one of the reasons that affect college students' interpersonal communication. Many college students lack communication experience, especially successful experience. They want to care about people, but they don't know where to start. They want to praise people, but they can't speak or express their feelings. They have a strong desire to make friends, but they always feel that there is no chance. In communication, they want to express but can't. They want to express tenderness in their hearts, but their words are blunt. These situations hinder their smooth communication with others. But most people know the importance of social skills and want to improve them.