In the practice of interpersonal communication, people have different degrees of fear, but everyone's reaction is different. Some college students have a particularly strong reaction in this regard. Due to psychological effects such as shyness and inferiority, I am particularly nervous when interacting with people. My heart is panting, my face is red, and my eyes dare not look straight. When talking to people, it seems incoherent and unintelligible. Especially in crowded places or in collective activities, I feel more afraid, afraid to deal with people and afraid to express myself. Serious can lead to social phobia.
2. Unwilling to associate
Some college students find that they are not as good as they were in middle school after going through the "crossing the single-plank bridge with thousands of troops", and then they form interpersonal barriers caused by jealousy and inferiority, think that they are not as good as others, and are afraid that others will look down on them. People lack the necessary trust and understanding, and interpersonal communication is dull. Lack the basic spirit of cooperation with classmates, and even regard classmates as opponents; Some students are arrogant and look down on others; Some students are weak in group consciousness, self-centered and indifferent to people and things around them; I'm happy, and I'm willing to talk to you if I'm happy, or I'll stay away from people. Students lack the necessary tolerance, and even fight for some trivial things. Some people always avoid giving in when they are in trouble, and they are unhappy all day, lacking the desire and interest to communicate. They are self-enclosed and narcissistic, but they are particularly sensitive and have poor psychological endurance. They are withdrawn, unwilling to show their faces and communicate with others.
3. Poor communication
Some college students are not good at understanding and mastering some communication knowledge and skills, and they seem too blunt, bookish and boring in the process of conversation, so they are grateful and will not tell them, but they can't be understood at that time. Some of them are obstacles to understanding caused by cognitive prejudice. They don't pay attention to the "first impression" in communication, pay attention to the way of communication, and don't pay attention to art when persuading, criticizing and rejecting others. Some college students don't pay attention to communication principles, make jokes on occasions, don't know how to save face, or speak rudely, which hurts each other's self-esteem. Or don't know how to respect each other's customs; Don't pretend to know how to talk. These performances are detrimental to the shaping of their own image and affect the further communication between students.
4, will not associate
The loss caused by the ideal model. After entering colleges and universities, most freshmen have a strong desire for interpersonal communication, but often find it difficult. The reason is that many college students often have a strong ideal color in the process of pursuing interpersonal communication. Taking the ideal model of friendship as the standard to measure interpersonal relationships in life will lead to high expectations and high frustration. Furthermore, some college students often talk about the past, but show strong dissatisfaction with interpersonal communication in real life. I don't know that communication lies in the accumulation of usual communication. Some college students don't understand that communication lies in the accumulation of usual communication, and they always want others to take the initiative to care about themselves and communicate with themselves, but they are always in a changing position; Or "rote learning" once asked. This kind of communication will end when the other party feels that it can't benefit themselves materially or spiritually, or even feels that it is cumbersome.
5. Lack of skills
Perhaps it is a comprehensive reflection of the above factors, such students are shy, inferior, lonely, suspicious, jealous, afraid and so on. Or lack basic interpersonal skills. They are generally eager to communicate, but due to improper communication methods, limited communication skills, personality defects or psychological barriers in communication, they neither know themselves nor others in the process of communication, which leads to communication failure. Long-term communication failure has made some students regard communication as a burden and gradually close themselves off. ?
The main factors affecting college students' interpersonal communication are environmental factors, spatial distance, communication frequency, similar background, complementary needs, communication attitude and personality characteristics. From psychological counseling and college students' daily life, it is not difficult to find that some college students lack interpersonal skills and experience, some are introverted or have cognitive biases in interpersonal communication, which leads to interpersonal tension among college students. The common problems in college students' interpersonal communication are teacher-student relationship, classmate relationship, parent-child relationship and heterosexual relationship.