O(∩_∩)O~~

I am a college student who is about to enter the society. A few years of college life has created a comprehensive development of morality, intelligence, physique, beauty and labor. Near graduation, I want to report my academic achievements in recent years to those who care about and love me, as follows:

I learned to cook: the technology of instant noodles is first-class in 3 13 dormitory.

I learned to use computers: I can switch computers skillfully, and I am especially good at playing online games. There are almost no opponents in the whole college.

I have learned many foreign languages: I know that I should use "Missy Missy" (Japanese) for eating, "Pig" (English) for swearing, and "Kill your aunt" (Russian) for saying goodbye to my friends.

I learned to be considerate and caring: I especially care about beautiful girls. In a few years, I took care of more than a dozen sisters and was named the love ambassador of our school.

Learned elegant music: won the commemorative prize of karaoke competition held by the "cordate telosma" music teahouse at the school gate many times.

Learned fitness sports: mainly playing mahjong, fighting landlords and fighting.

I am proficient in chemistry: I know that hydrochloric acid is extremely corrosive and must not be touched by hand.

I learned to be self-reliant and earn money to support myself: I often sell football tickets outside the sports center.

I learned to unite my classmates: everyone smokes and everyone drinks. During the exam, everyone rushed to hand me a note.

I have practiced good calligraphy: all the places of interest around the school have my inscription: don't feel bad, visit here.

I learned to be frugal: I get up at three o'clock every afternoon and have three meals, which saves a lot of food for the country. Bath once every half month, and wash clothes once a month on average. It has been rated as the "saving star" of the hospital for many times.

I learned to write articles: there is a drawer full of love letters for girls.

I am keen on art: especially the body art and soap film art in Hong Kong.

I'm a management major: all my juniors believe me.

I have mastered the driving skills: I can doze off by bike while smoking.

I learned to respect the old and love the young: when I met a professor and called him handsome, I saw my schoolmate call him "older".

I learned to be down-to-earth: barefoot, wearing a suit, shorts and tie every day.

I learned a sense of humor: I can tell more than two thousand dirty jokes.

I learned to convince people by reasoning: when I have an argument with others, I often scold them until they cry and admit their mistakes to me.