However, children can't control their emotions well at this stage (especially in junior high school). Although they have independent consciousness and requirements, they can't express and communicate well, so they often show refusal or even resistance, which is rebellious psychology. As parents, we should guide our children to express and communicate, instead of suppressing their thoughts and consciousness, so that they can grow up healthily.
From your short question, I feel that you are a little caught off guard, and you are a little at a loss in the face of such changes in your daughter. The child seems to be "out of control" and is no longer obedient as before. It seems that it is deliberately aimed at you, and you don't know how to deal with it, which makes you feel very anxious and worried. I understand the difficulties and worries you face as a mother. You can try to start from these angles:
1. Equal communication. Learn more about your daughter's thoughts in everything, such as what she thinks and why she does it. Close to children's interests in life, do some things that children like together, and share their feelings with children; The child is in a sensitive period. Only when they feel equal and safe will they be willing to communicate with you. The accusation that "I was wrong about you" will only make children farther and farther away.
2. Grasp the general principles and decentralize appropriately. When it comes to important or principled matters, it must be particularly important to firmly establish principles and let your daughter know the bottom line, such as making friends and studying. For other small things, such as when to do your homework every day, you must delegate power to your daughter. Now that junior high school students understand the truth, don't be too strict with small things; In this way, relaxation can not only make children feel relaxed atmosphere, but also grasp the general direction of their growth.
3. Respect privacy. Never read a child's diary because of worry or anxiety. The consequences of this will make children more rebellious. Some children with fierce personalities may run away from home, and children who have experienced these things are likely to cause depression or even distortion of their personalities, and they will encounter more difficulties in getting married and starting a business in the future.
Generally speaking, if you can do this, children will feel safe and accepted, and will "return" sooner or later, open their hearts to you, return to the state of getting along well with each other before, and get through the rebellious period smoothly.