1. It was dishonest to eat when I was a child. In order to educate me, an old farmer said to me: 60 years of hard work, no food to eat, no snot and feces to throw away.

There is a rich man looking for a servant. The topic of the interview is going to the toilet. The first few came out without washing their hands. So the rich man sent them away, and only one person washed his hands, so the rich man left him. But one day, the rich man found that he didn't wash his hands when he came out.

The rich man asked him why. The servant replied, "I brought toilet paper today ..."

A man saw a store having a big sale and went in. "What do you want?" "I want to buy dog food." "We have a rule that you must prove that you have a dog."

"Where is such a rule?" "This is the case with goods on sale." The man struggled with the salesman for a long time, but the salesman still refused to sell it to him. No way, the man had to go home and bring the dog before buying dog food. A few days later, the man went to this store to buy cat food. "Give me two boxes of cat food." "We have a rule that you must prove that you have a cat." It was the same salesman. The man struggled with her for a long time and finally had to go home to take the cat. "Just put your hand in." The salesman put his hand in. "What is it? Very sticky. " "I want to buy two rolls of toilet paper."

A man took his friend to visit his grandmother. While he was talking to his grandmother, his friends began to eat peanuts on the coffee table and ate them all. When they left, his friend said to his grandmother, "Thank you for the peanuts." Grandma replied, "Oh! Hmm! Alas! Because all my teeth have fallen out, I can only suck out the chocolate. I am old, cough. ...

Some people like the dish "spicy vermicelli pot" very much. Once, he went to a restaurant and ordered this dish again. But the waiter told him it was sold out. "Is it really sold out?" He asked in disappointment. "Sir, really sold out. Look, the last one was sold to the gentleman at that table. " The waiter replied. According to the waiter's instructions, the man saw a very decent gentleman sitting next to him. The gentleman ate almost all the food, but the "spicy vermicelli pot" was still full. The man thought that this gentleman wasted delicious food, so he went up to this gentleman and pointed to that one. "The gentleman shook his head gracefully. So the man immediately sat down, picked up the spoon and wolfed it down. After a while, he swallowed half of it. Suddenly, he found a little mouse lying at the bottom of the casserole. After a while of nausea, the man vomited all the eaten vermicelli back into the casserole. When he was there, the gentleman looked at him sympathetically and said, "Very sympathetic eyes. "I was like this ..."

On this day, the hotel owner is patrolling the lobby. A beggar came forward and said, "Can the boss give me a toothpick?" The boss gave him one and sent it away. After a while, another beggar came and asked for a toothpick. The boss thought, why does the beggar want toothpicks instead of rice now? I gave him one and sent it away. Not too old, here comes another beggar. The boss said to him, "Are you here to get a toothpick, too?" The beggar said, "I vomited alone, and I came late." The first two beggars ate all the food, and now there is only soup left. Can you give me a straw? "

7. Boss, the second child is flying, and the second child is airsick and has been vomiting. A bag is full, so the boss has to get it. When he came back, he found that the whole plane was vomiting. The boss asked the reason, and the second said, "I think this bag is full, so I had to drink half a bag and throw up."

If you haven't spit it out, I have to admit that you are a master, so I will do my best-

8. Killing skills-

One day, the eldest brother and the second brother went to the theatre again, and saw that they had an argument about the development of the plot halfway, so they made a bet. The boss pointed to a row of spittoons in front of him and said, "The loser should take a sip of what's there." Unfortunately, eldest brother lost, so he took a sip with a frown. Then they bet on the following story. This time, the second brother lost. I saw my second brother pick up a spittoon and hit it hard.

The second one shook his head. "I don't want to drink. The sputum in that spittoon is too thick. I really can't stop biting. " ......