Family education method: set an example
Whether the image of mother in children's mind is tall or not is directly proportional to the educational effect. Because she loves reading very much, my daughter imperceptibly likes the book I bought for her when she was a child. When she saw the words, she asked, studied, and formed a good habit of reading. Books such as Romance of the Three Kingdoms, Good Words and Expressions of Journey to the West, and Excellent Composition are things that she must do before going to bed, so she gets good grades in Chinese.
I still remember one time, I went to my daughter's school to find her and saw her writing the homework assigned by the teacher on the blackboard. The handwriting is very poor. When I came back, I asked her to practice. She said that if she practiced, she would not be able to practice well. I can't write well either, but in order to convince my daughter that calligraphy can be practiced well, I bought a copybook and a writing brush and practiced it every night. I practiced two bottles of ink, and the paper I practiced was as high as a bench. Seeing that I practiced so hard, my daughter became interested. She often practices beside me when I practice, and sometimes asks me some writing skills. Her handwriting is much better now. I said yes, nothing is difficult, as long as you are willing to climb.
I have met some parents, and when they have time, they either play mahjong or watch TV, and then chat with their neighbors and say some boring things. I don't know what kind of negative effects your actions will have on children. Then some parents think that the family only cares about their children's lives, and education is a school matter. They don't realize that educating children is the responsibility of parents first. Some parents spoil their children in every way and relax their education, which also fails to perform their duties well; There are still very few parents who only pay attention to "money", pay no attention to their children's education at all, and completely give up their parents' vocation.
Our society is always troubled by the problem of juvenile delinquents. As we all know, juvenile offenders are often those bad adults who "set an example". Should we parents have a good rational attitude? Don't always let our children do what they want, ask us how we are doing first. The success or failure of family education is inseparable from parents' answers to this question.
Family education method: face children's mistakes correctly
Some parents don't want to educate their children well, but they don't know the laws of their children's physical and mental development and the scientific methods of educating them. Which child doesn't make mistakes? I remember when my daughter was 9 years old, I asked her to practice the piano. Once, she didn't practice. I asked why not. She said that she had given up her practice score. Actually, I found the score and asked it on purpose. My daughter really lied. I was so anxious and angry that I really wanted to hit her a few times. But I still calmed down and whispered: Mom doesn't like children who lie. Tell your mother the truth, and your mother will forgive you no matter how wrong you are. As soon as my daughter said she didn't want to practice the piano, she hid the music. Looking at my daughter's wronged eyes, I can't help but reflect on myself. Every day after school, I finish my homework and practice the piano. Every weekend, I either learn piano or English and math. The piano teacher once told me that my daughter is not very talented in music. She is so young, but I just want her to be promising, accomplished, demanding and dedicated. But have I ever stood in her shoes and felt her feelings? Thinking of this, I bent down and asked her if she was not interested in learning piano at all. You don't want to learn, and mom won't want you to learn.
Isn't the most important growth process of children a childhood full of fun and fantasy? This is the answer I got from my daughter's thinking about learning piano. Let love fly and let children grow up healthily and happily in childhood fairy tales. Is it difficult for them to be in the proper state of their own life experience?
When a child makes a mistake, the only thing he can do is to beat, scold and punish. But this kind of education can't make children realize the harm and consequences of mistakes. When a child makes a mistake, parents should calmly reason with the child and analyze the reasons for the mistake with the child. If you want to criticize a child, you might as well praise his merits first. Starting from affirming their own advantages, children will be more willing to accept criticism from their parents. You can also smile when criticizing. But the eyes must be full of emotion, and don't have that kind of disgust and hate that iron will not produce. Be serious, but full of hope for your children. Let children feel the care of their parents. When pointing out children's mistakes, parents should have a unified opinion, not one person's point of view, or even a phenomenon of teaching and nursing. If so, children will not take their parents' education to heart.
When it comes to scientific educational methods, we have to mention "encouraging education". At home, I often say to my children, "You are the best" and "You are the pride of my parents and teachers". When I see my child's smiling face full of confidence, I am sure that my encouragement will make her work harder, because she knows that as long as she works hard, she will be praised and will succeed.
Family education method: treat children's grades correctly
Many parents are often very happy when they see their children's good grades. Once their children's grades are a little worse, they will get angry, and they will start work, and then they will start work. None of this is desirable. So, how should we treat children's achievements?
1, for educational purposes, we should not just look at scores. The purpose of education is to cultivate people with ideals, morality, education and discipline. In addition to the results of various subjects, the results of sports, ideology and morality, art, music, labor and other subjects are the embodiment of children's quality. Parents should pay attention to the overall quality level of their children from the educational purpose, and encourage them to do well in any subject. If you don't do well in any subject, you should also let your child be confident and treat him with a relaxed and enterprising attitude. I remember that I only got 104 in the science final exam last semester in Grade One. When the report card was placed in front of me, my anger jumped up and I was shaking with the report card in my hand. But I still tried to control my emotions and asked her in a friendly tone, "Why didn't I get the ideal score this time?" The child told me that it was because the teacher stood beside her all the time during the exam and was so nervous that she forgot everything. After hearing this, I smiled and said to my child, as long as you work hard, the score is not the most important, as long as you have solid knowledge. After the child was in a better mood, I continued to tell her that your nervousness this time is still related to your failure to exercise yourself boldly. So when the teacher asks you to answer questions in the future, you should answer them loudly, regardless of whether the answer is right or wrong; When you have the opportunity to speak, you should bravely go to the podium and don't give up because of timidity; The teacher asked you to preside over the class meeting. You should confidently say that I can, and don't be afraid just because it's the first time. Children, every brave step, every time you overcome timidity and shyness, is a victory. Mom believes that through your efforts, you will definitely become an excellent girl! After this time, my daughter is obviously more lively and cheerful in school and life, and she is more brave and decisive when she meets things. I think this is an improvement that high scores can't be exchanged for!
2, starting from the reality of their children, can not blindly compare. Some parents always compare other people's high scores with their children's low scores, hoping to inspire their children. In fact, this practice is unscientific. Because the actual situation of each child is objectively different, parents should look at their children's achievements from their original quality level and encourage them to make progress.
3. Respect your child's self-esteem and don't impose your subjective will on your child. Some parents set a score index for their children before the final exam. When children's grades can't meet their own requirements, they just blame them. Improper criticism and reprimand by parents can easily make children feel inferior; Excessive strict requirements will cause children's anxiety, tension and even negative psychology. Parents should protect and respect their children's self-esteem and encourage them to develop their inner potential.
Pay attention to the all-round development of morality, intelligence, physique, beauty and labor, not just grades. At present, the problems of poor physical fitness, high myopia rate, poor aesthetic ability and poor homework habits of primary and secondary school students are more prominent, which should be highly valued by parents. Education at all times and in all countries puts moral education in the first place, and the formation of good moral character is related to a child's life.
5, give children more spiritual encouragement, don't give too much material stimulation. Rewards should be appropriate and instructive, and should not be abused. Children's education does not depend on the amount of money, but on the love, understanding, care and support of parents. Practice has proved that too much material stimulation can easily lead to children's bad tendency of "looking forward" and hinder their all-round development in morality, intelligence and physique.
Family education methods: teach children to treat men and women correctly.
A child is a book. From childhood to adolescence, from adolescence to adolescence, parents turn back page after page, but it is not easy to really understand. Parents often lament that the older the child, the less they know about her. Daughter goes to junior high school. I talked to her once about the communication between boys and girls, which is to prevent puppy love. I told my children: As you grow up, it is normal if you have a good impression on a male classmate in the class and are willing to associate with him, which shows that your physical and mental development is normal. You can have more contact with boys, of course, it's best to be confined to group occasions, but if you think it's necessary, you can also let your classmates, including gay men, learn to play at home, and I will treat your classmates very politely and friendly. In the interaction with male students, I hope you cherish their friendship, but you should also grasp a boundary, that is, in the middle and high school stage, the interaction with male students can only be friendship, not puppy love.
Some parents don't respect their children's privacy. What privacy do you think children are so young? Besides, I am the parents of my children. I can't see anything. It is this concept that gives many children and their parents Mao Dun. For example, parents are worried about puppy love. Therefore, we should get to the bottom of the communication between children and the opposite sex, and review and reply to the letters from classmates. Some parents even open their children's letters privately and secretly open their drawers for inspection. Check your child's diary, email, etc. However, parents do this, the effect is not great. In the long run, children and parents' Mao Dun will not be solved, and the problems will accumulate and the effect of education will get worse and worse! Therefore, parents must respect their children, understand the laws of their physical and mental development, and educate them scientifically. Only in this way can we truly become children's friends, the chatterboxes in children's hearts will naturally open to us, and parents no longer need to know their children by invading their privacy. In this way, what Liu Yong, a writer in Taiwan Province Province described as "communication and win-win" has been realized.
Family education method: educate children to surf the Internet correctly.
With the advent of the information age, the network is playing an increasingly irreplaceable role in society. Through surfing the Internet, children can not only learn more network knowledge and skills, but also broaden their horizons and stimulate their enthusiasm for learning. At the same time, through various online education, children can also choose their own learning methods and contents according to their personal interests and develop their own personalized specialties. Of course, the influence of bad content on children's physical and mental health can not be ignored, but simple prohibition is obviously suspected of choking on food and may lead to more unfavorable factors. It can be seen that parents should not completely restrict their children from surfing the Internet, but should conduct effective guidance and management to encourage their children to seek more information and knowledge that is beneficial to their growth and learning through the Internet. I think:
First of all, parents should take measures to guide education and management. To eliminate the influence of bad content on children in the network, it is mainly to rely on the guidance of children's own thoughts. Only by letting children fully understand what will have an adverse effect on them can they avoid subjectively searching and browsing this kind of information.
On the other hand, parents need to know as much as possible about network knowledge, and at the same time pay attention to using means with relevant protection functions. At present, the "Green Internet Service" launched by Hangzhou Telecom has two major functions: filtering Internet content and controlling Internet time, which can effectively screen bad information on the Internet, control Internet time and content, and create a healthier online space for children. In this way, even if parents don't know much about network application technology, as long as they let their children use the green Internet, they can safely let their children roam in the vast and pure network world.