Parents don't need a certificate, and the threshold is too low. Therefore, it is very important to learn to be a good father and mother. In fact, if you want to be a qualified parent, you can easily cultivate excellent children by learning empathy education.
Empathy is a kind of ability, the ability to understand others, that is, to understand others' thoughts and express this understanding in a warm, respectful and caring way. In short, empathy is empathy, looking at the rationality of children's behavior from the perspective of children and looking at the world with children's eyes. There are many empathy stories between my two children and me. ...
Story 1, in the first grade, the eldest son said that he was stupid and hated English. I immediately objected that calling you stupid means calling me stupid, because I am your mother, and I don't admit that I am stupid. You are much smarter than me. Then I discussed with him in detail how to learn English well. In the first semester, his English score increased from 63 to 96, and then to 1 15 (full mark 120).
Story 2: The youngest son was wronged by the teacher when he cut in line for dinner on the first day. He is very wronged. I first expressed my trust and understanding and suggested that he keep a diary of what happened and seek psychological comfort in this way. Another time, I found him still doing his homework at 1 am. In order to punish a classmate who made a mistake, the English teacher asked the whole class to write English words a hundred times. I told him to stop writing and go to bed. The teacher's punishment method is obviously wrong. The next day, I went to the school to ask the headmaster for advice. Parents should also look at the teacher's behavior objectively.
Story 3: Two children have two particularly good classmates in junior high school. Four children sometimes go to Internet cafes. They go to Internet cafes just to indulge in games. Considering the heavy learning tasks in junior high school, my children have good time self-management ability since childhood. I readily agreed, and since then they will go to Internet cafes once or twice a month.
Story 4: I chatted with my eldest son on the summer vacation when I graduated from Grade Three. He said he didn't want to go to school. It is estimated that many parents will say no when they hear this, and then give a lot of reasons for studying: you can't find a good job without the college entrance examination. If you don't have a good job, you earn less, you earn less ... and you will give an example of reasoning with emotion. And I blurted out a sentence, good! And add that if you think about what you want to do and believe that you can do it well, I will support you first. In fact, he doesn't really want to go to school, but he is too tired, just talking, or deliberately testing my attitude. Seeing that I have no objection, he said to himself, I don't know what I can do without going to school.
In the fifth story, the eldest son said in the third grade that learning is the destruction of teenagers. I said, yes, I'd like to go to work if I have a choice. It's really hard to go to school, and I have listed a lot of hardships. But I also said that you are from China, and you must accept this exam-oriented education system. We can't change, we can only adapt. Just bite the bullet and get through these years.
Story 6: In the second year of high school, both children are in puppy love, and there are less than ten girls in key science classes in key high schools, which shows that my son has the advantage of attracting girls. I found an opportunity to chat with them in a good mood. I first expressed my understanding of puppy love, then listened carefully to the children's thoughts, and finally gave some suggestions. In fact, I mainly told them not to steal the forbidden fruit. Parents are afraid of raising their sons and daughters. Puppy love is not a scourge. It's better to treat a child's puppy love lightly and skillfully.
This is just a short story that I feel the same way with my children. In three years of high school, my two sons and their girlfriends were admitted to 985 Engineering University as they wished. After working for three years, the eldest son married his first girlfriend, and they fell in love for more than ten years. Now the babies are all in kindergarten. The youngest son broke up with his first girlfriend in the second year of research, but isn't the emotional companionship and psychological dependence of each other for eight years a good memory of life?
It's time to find a job after studying. Like most parents, I don't ask my children to take the civil service exam and have a job. I respect the idea that they only choose private enterprises, do not take civil servants, and do not enter state-owned enterprises and central enterprises. The high-tech work done by the eldest son has always been his major, and the younger son has taken postgraduate examinations across schools and majors. Now working in a media company, both brothers have a good career.