It turns out that my mother made many rules for DOG, such as no snacks, no sleeping in, no drinks ... But my father thinks these requirements are a little harsh on children, which are not good for children, but they can really bring fun to people. Although it should be managed, children should not be allowed to practice like "ascetic monks", and it doesn't matter if they break the precepts occasionally.
When Mo Mo was a child, although he didn't know why there were these two kinds of voices at home, as he grew up day by day, he quickly mastered the law and made a very cooperative move: when his mother was at home, he wouldn't clamor for snacks; When mom is not at home, she eats snacks and drinks happily with dad.
In fact, the reason why have it both ways is a stranger is that parents have different educational concepts. If one parent is strict with the child and the other parent is too tolerant, both parents insist on their own ideas, refuse to negotiate and go their own way, and the educational standards for the child are constantly changing, so it is difficult for the child to become "not smart".
In fact, whether it is strict with children or gentle and relaxed with children, the starting point of both parents is to hope that their children can be better, but there will always be differences on some issues, which is naturally difficult to avoid in the education of children.
However, if the two sides go their own way for a long time, children will use the differences of parents' opinions to find a situation that is beneficial to them, and will gradually move closer to the moderate side and exclude the harsh one. Even if the latter's requirements are reasonable, children will feel unreasonable. If children are often treated with different policies, parents' WeChat will be greatly discounted in their children's minds, which will cause children to "obey the yang", affect their judgment ability, and they cannot distinguish whether their actions are correct or not, and establish a wrong view of right and wrong.
Since it is for the good of children, it is not a big deal to have different opinions. As long as both parents can seek common ground while reserving differences, they can find the best compromise.
First of all, don't argue in front of the children. You can talk about different opinions in private.
Parents disagree, and children actually don't know which side to listen to. The consequence of winning or losing in front of children is that no matter which side wins, the other side's position in children's hearts will decline. Therefore, parents can make an agreement in advance. When one party is educating children, if the other party disagrees, don't express opinions for the time being, let the other party try first, and then find time to discuss and reach a unanimous conclusion and strictly implement it.
Secondly, we should avoid facial education. When many families manage their children, one person plays the white face and the other plays the red face. In fact, this is not conducive to children's education, and children can easily become people who do things by face, bully the weak and fear the hard, and develop a style of face-to-face and behind-the-face.
In addition, some old people in the family will be particularly distressed by their little baby. Parents must negotiate with their elders, don't be too arrogant when disciplining their children, and educate their children in a United front!