Anyone who knows a little bit about brain science will know that it is not easy for children to control their emotions when they are young, which is closely related to the development of the prefrontal cortex responsible for emotional management. In fact, the development of this part of the brain will not be completed until the age of 25, so the child's mood is easy to fluctuate. "Beauty, the day of June" makes sense.
If children are easy to understand emotionally, let's see what "laissez-faire" means.
If you let it go, or if he loses his temper, you give in and use his will, and the result is obvious. In this way, children either learn to use their emotions to intimidate their parents to achieve their goals, or the more they are ignored, the more intense they express themselves, so that the ability of emotional management will not improve with age.
But in the eyes of many people, allowing children to have emotions is a laissez-faire. Then, if parents don't blindly stop their children from losing their temper, or follow their children's anger or submission, but accompany their children through the emotional process in a reasonable way without being disturbed by their emotions, then such "laissez-faire" is advocated. In the end, children will know how to express and manage their emotions more and more because of their parents' acceptance of his emotions, their own demonstration and correct guidance.
I feel that most people's understanding of laissez-faire is actually the second kind, so when educating children, many people will ask them not to cry, not to lose their temper, and so on, and suppress them in a strict way. Therefore, helping children manage their emotions in this way is actually not conducive to the development of children's emotional management ability. It will only make children suppress themselves more and more, even don't know what emotions they have, and lack empathy for others.
Let the child lose his temper, generally ignore the child, let him make trouble, or appease him and meet his unreasonable demands unprincipled.
The former, if you don't know your child's needs in time and treat them coldly, it will make your child feel insecure and dependent on his family; Failure to find a good solution will affect children's lack of experience in solving life and career problems in the future. Over time, children will lose their enthusiasm for life.
The latter, conniving at children losing their temper to meet their demands, will make children mistakenly think that crying and losing their temper can achieve their goals. After forming thinking, when you grow up, you may not want to take the initiative to solve the problem, but think about scrolling in an extreme or even extreme way.
When the child loses his temper, accompany him first, let the child vent, calm down, accompany the child to find the reason for losing his temper and seek solutions together. Tell your child that losing your temper can't solve any problem, except your own pain, you should analyze it rationally and find a better solution.