Just like the lyrics of "Where's Dad?". : this is the first time to be your father, and our mood is a bit complicated; You desperately germinated my white hair and wrote a roll together. ...
Yes, everyone is a parent for the first time. We have seen many professional skills training courses, training professionals and holding certificates. However, I have never seen the "proof of parents' employment". It seems that marriage is the bond. The next step in marriage is to have children and pass them on from generation to generation.
Therefore, as parents for the first time, most of them are inexperienced and stumble forward in groping.
Children are not perfect. Similarly, every parent is not perfect. Everyone needs to improve themselves in constant practice and gradually learn how to educate their children, how to receive education and how to love each other.
One mistake that almost all parents make is to lose their temper.
Maybe some parents are very wronged: they are not critical of their children, nor are they under great pressure at work, just talking. Children are playful and don't study, children don't work hard, children don't make progress, and children can't meet their own requirements. ...
Yes, how many children don't annoy their parents? Which child is not constantly challenging the authority of parents, testing the bottom line of parents, and brewing more and more free space for himself?
The contradiction between parents and children is natural. Children are naturally fond of playing, and parents always want their children to study hard and not take detours. ...
Therefore, there are many such examples: parents are angry and children don't care; The bigger the parents' temper, the more stubborn the children are; The more frustrated parents are, the more difficult it is for children to manage; With the escalation of parents' temper, there are more and more bad behaviors of children.
Gradually, many parents involuntarily fall into a strange circle of thoughts, which is also the "seemingly most useful method" passed down from generation to generation: yelling at children is useless, so they have to scold, and if the "strength" of scolding is not enough, they will fight! Anyway, the ancestors said, "A stick makes a dutiful son."
In fact, it may be that parents are going in the wrong direction. The greater the intensity, the worse the situation.
What child is not as lovely as a newborn angel?
At that time, even though he cried and was moody every day, he often peed all over his body and needed 24-hour special care from his parents. A child can often keep a family busy.
But will parents scold their children too much at that time?
Don't! Parents are mostly excited, recording their children's growth bit by bit, preaching their progress everywhere, and not stingy with their praise!
At that time, parents were also angels in children's hearts!
Is that he can trust, rely on, and act like a spoiled brat. So he will show all his good and bad sides to his parents at a glance.
However, parents changed before they knew it. Began to criticize some of their behaviors and even get angry with them for no reason. ...
The child began to be nervous and tried to cover up his own truth; However, after all, "the road is still very shallow", and the practice of breaking glass even aroused the anger of parents: drinking, even lying!
There are less and less praises from parents and more and more criticisms; Smile gradually less, frown more and more. ...
Bad temper makes children afraid to get close and open their hearts to their parents. They are in constant fear and insecurity, and naturally there will be various problems in their growth.
In fact, children will inevitably encounter various problems in the process of growing up.
In the face of problems, parents' attitudes and communication skills will determine their children's future.
"Rational education" is often much better than furious. Let the family be full of feelings and communication, not full of violence and reprimand.
First of all, parents should understand that children are independent individuals from the moment they are born, not their own vassals. Only by truly understanding this point can we create a good parent-child relationship.
Secondly, parents should know how to respect their children and give them enough trust, freedom and love. Parents and children should be equal, don't put yourself above others.
Furthermore, parents should give their children more room for patience, tolerance and trust. Although it is a test of parents' endurance to watch children make mistakes without correcting them immediately, we should believe that children have the ability to correct themselves.
Because every growth is a process of constant self-reflection and self-correction, we should respect children's right to enjoy this process, but we should keep the sensitivity of helping and pulling children at critical moments.
As the Sichuan Higher People's Court said in its final judgment on the above-mentioned father:
The court held that it is understandable that a father is full of expectations and ardent hopes for a woman's success. However, it is foolish and hateful to ignore that children are completely independent individuals and put personal pressure and ideals on them.
The court held that in this case, the defendant (father) was almost harsh on his already excellent daughter in study, words and deeds, and often resorted to violence, as evidenced by many school teachers.
Therefore, although the biological father has no direct intention to kill the child, he should continue to use violence against the child, knowing the possible consequences and letting it go, and should be convicted and punished for intentional injury.
May all parents who regard their children as private property take warning!