It used to be very simple to raise children, as long as you could eat and wear warm clothes. But it's different now. It is a very good phenomenon that parents in the new era pay special attention to their children's education.

From a psychological point of view, there are the following seven signs, which show that you have educated your children well!

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Children dare to show their true feelings in front of you.

Everyone has their own emotions, and children are no exception. Parents are the safest and warmest "harbor" for children. If children dare to express their truest emotions in front of their parents, especially anger, sadness and fear, it shows that children trust their parents very much. This shows that the distance between parents and children is very close, and the children have enough security in their hearts, so the children dare to spoil at will.

If children always hide their emotions in front of their parents, or only dare to express a certain emotion, it means that there is a problem between parents and children. Parents' love for their children should be selfless, so no matter what emotions the children show, parents should be an accepting attitude, so that the children can really live.

02

I will call you as soon as my child is injured or has problems.

Parents often react, children love to lie, children are bullied by classmates and dare not speak, and children do not ask their parents for advice when they encounter problems, all of which show that children have a kind of "rejection" to their parents. The reason why children don't tell their parents and don't let them know is because they are afraid of parents' blame, parents' ridicule, parents' distrust, parents' indifference and so on.

Therefore, when children do something wrong or make some mistakes, parents should not directly scold them, but try to solve the problem. Otherwise, you will lose your children's trust in you, and there will be some barriers between parents and children. When a child dares to tell his parents everything, it shows that the child has great trust in his parents and has enough security in his heart.

03

Children are willing to talk to you about their ideas.

When children are willing to talk to you about their ideas, even if they are unconstrained, it is enough to show that your relationship is very close. Some parents are too strict with their children. As long as the children's ideas are bad or wrong, they will immediately interrupt and teach them a lesson. This will keep children away from you and never want to tell you what they really think.

04

The feedback children get from you is unlabeled.

Some parents' feedback to their children is not objective at all, and even put a lot of labels on their children.

I once heard a mother say that the book that children don't like vegetables very much is nothing, but she quickly came to the conclusion that this is the reason for his impatience.

We don't know what the two have to do. The only relationship may be that the mother is worried that the child doesn't like vegetables and that the child is impatient.

Some parents always label their children after telling them their behavior-such as laziness, greed, lack of intelligence and so on.

These labels and judgments do not make children better, but make them more and more like "labels".

Labeling children at will will make them worse and worse, or be above them, and make them live very tired. Children are unique angels. They can be smart, slow, naughty and steady. Every child has his own personality characteristics and does not need any labels.

05

Children are always encouraged to do what they want.

Doing what you like can help children develop a sense of accomplishment.

In the process of pursuing interests, children will develop the ability of "perseverance" and they will try less risky behaviors.

Some parents don't allow their children to discover their interests. The "interests" they let their children develop are actually the interests or hobbies that children have not realized.

If parents don't let their children discover their talents and force them to learn fields that they are not interested in, children will be very afraid of disappointing their parents and feel particularly stressed in the process of learning.

As a result, the child has been studying in depression.

Not every child has to be a scientist, an engineer, a painter, a doctor or a teacher ... you shouldn't impose your ideas on children. No matter what a child does, it is what he wants to do most and what he is most willing to do. Talent is not cultivated by parents, but discovered by children through constant exploration. If parents force their children to do things they don't like, their children will be under great pressure and their inner happiness will be very low.

06

You make appropriate rules for your children without worrying about their resistance.

Responsible parents will guide their children's behavior and make appropriate rules for them, instead of letting their children go because they are worried that they are unhappy or dislike themselves.

Children who let go completely will encounter a lot of trouble in the future.

Appropriate rules include:

These can give children good rules and let them adapt to such a life law slowly. Including children playing mobile phones and watching TV, should be allowed and children should not be deprived of their rights. What parents should do is to make time rules for their children, such as how long they can only play every day, so that children can not only be satisfied, but also learn self-control.

07

Parents apologize when they get along.

Problems in parent-child relationship are not all the children's fault, and sometimes parents make mistakes. For example, emotional overreaction, losing temper with children, and hitting children.

If things have happened, what parents need to do is to admit and make up for their mistakes, sincerely apologize to their children and explain why they made mistakes this time, instead of putting all the mistakes on their children.

You can tell your child: When you calm down, think about what you would do if you had to do it all over again. You can also talk to your child about what emotions or thoughts make you unable to control your impulses.

When you really do this, you will find that your child has also become a person who dares to take responsibility, and the relationship between you is more harmonious.

Parents should not condescend, nor should they educate their children on the pretext of "I am doing it for your own good". Instead, we should have a correct attitude, put down the so-called "shelf" and educate our children sincerely.

If there are the above seven signs, it means that you have educated your children well.

However, if there are seven other signs on your child, it means that your child is moving towards inferiority!

Psychologist Shaun Cooper spent five years studying psychology, and then found that children with inferiority complex actually have these seven signs from a very young age.

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Children are oversensitive.

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Children are too sensible.

The more sensible children are when they are young, the harder they actually live. Because children are lively and cheerful by nature, they are curious about the world. Children who don't make noise and obey their parents are likely to feel inferior and think they don't deserve unconditional love from their parents. Only by embodying their own values can parents love them.

03

Children always compare themselves with others.

Children with low self-esteem tend to think too little of themselves. They don't believe that they have their own bright spots that are different from others. They always habitually compare themselves with the people around them and belittle themselves with the advantages of others. This contrast will only make them more and more uncomfortable, more and more uneasy and more and more painful. People with inferiority often have the idea that "he is better than me and I am not as good as him", so even though they may be really excellent, they can't feel superiority from it. Such children are always afraid to go out of their comfort zone and try new things. Without the help of others, their inferiority will only get heavier and heavier.

04

Children pursue perfection excessively.

Children with inferiority are eager for recognition and praise from others, so they like to pursue extraordinary perfection. Before you do anything, you must be perfectly prepared before you can start to act. If you are not fully prepared, you would rather never start. Excessive pursuit of perfection also represents the difficulty of the process. However, in the process of completion, they can easily find such impossibility, which will often make them constantly deny themselves and aggravate their tendency of inferiority. When they pursue perfection but fail to achieve their goals, they are often extremely depressed and can't bear great pressure and collapse.

05

Children always judge others.

Children who always doubt others, distrust others and always like to find fault with others are actually very inferior. Although such children may be particularly strong outside, it is actually a "self-protection mechanism" for them. Only by criticizing the shortcomings of others can we cover up our incompetence and "protect" ourselves from inferiority.

06

Children like to procrastinate when things happen.

There is a saying that "there is only one thing in the world that will never fail, and that is never to start". Children with low self-esteem always like to procrastinate, because they are afraid of failure, so they keep putting off the progress of something, so that they do nothing and finally accomplish nothing. And they will fall into a vicious circle. The longer things wait, the harder it is for them to achieve their goals and the stronger their inner frustration will be.

07

Children can't face their own shortcomings.

Everyone has shortcomings, but children with inferiority can't accept their own shortcomings. They spend a lot of time and energy to cover up their shortcomings in an attempt to escape others' evaluation of their shortcomings. But this kind of concealment often makes people with inferiority feel more pressure.

Professor Li Meijin once said: Every child's behavior and psychology must be related to parents' educational methods.

Therefore, if parents find that their children have the above seven signs, they should check whether they have given their children the wrong guidance in their daily education, and must pay attention to their inferiority complex and give them positive guidance.