"School anxiety" is the topic that parents of preschool children are most afraid of and talk about. Especially for children who have just entered the park, almost every child has anxiety about entering the park. With children's anxiety about entering the park, parents also have the same symptoms.

Another year when I entered the park, every time. Such a scene is not uncommon, and parents who have experienced it feel the same. Some children will cry at home and say I don't want to go to kindergarten. They will hug their parents tightly at the kindergarten gate and won't let them leave. Some children will cry. If this state is good, it will last for a week, if it is not good, it may last for a month, and it may be repeated after a while.

How to help children get through the anxiety of entering the park smoothly? Four tricks to share with you:

In The Little Prince, the fox said the sense of ceremony, "It is to make one day different from other days and one moment different from other moments."

"Entering the park" is the first time that a child leaves his familiar environment and people and begins to face new environment and people. It is the first step for children to trust their parents and others, and to learn to be independent and socialize. In kindergarten, children will have their first best friend in life. In kindergarten, children will learn to be independent and cooperate with others. This is a brand-new and very important starting point for a child's life.

Brainstorm with your children with a relaxed and happy mood and think about what you need to take to kindergarten. Encourage children to take the initiative to pack up the items that need to be prepared for "entering the park". Choose your own spare clothes and put them in your schoolbag. Some kindergartens allow children to bring a toy they like and let them choose it themselves. Some parents silently get everything ready for fear of making mistakes. Nothing happened to the child, and he didn't even have to carry a schoolbag the next day. The child will decide in his mind that this is your business, not mine.

Children's affairs encourage children to make decisions, and they have no sense of responsibility for things they don't participate in. Even if there are mistakes, it is also an opportunity for children to learn and grow from them. I forgot to bring it this time, so I have to remember to bring it next time.

Children will judge the importance of things according to our serious attitude towards them. Create a "sense of ceremony" and solemnly record this precious moment with children.

A small cake, a favorite schoolbag, a small celebration ceremony and a good start. "Ritual sense" is very important to a person's life. Only in plain life will beautiful light shine. Teach children to respect important moments and be serious. Children can feel the meaning of growth from it.

Speaking of entering the park, it is bound to be accompanied by the word anxiety. Entrance anxiety is a phenomenon that almost every child will have, but the degree is different. So first of all, please be glad you have a normal child.

Every child is different, but in the final analysis, the needs of every child are the same, including us adults. Adler, the founder of individual psychology, said that people pursue a sense of belonging and value all their lives, and so do children.

Separation anxiety is the performance of children seeking a sense of belonging. Since birth, children spend most of their time at home and in familiar surroundings, meeting their most familiar family members. He feels safe. Suddenly going to a new environment and facing unfamiliar people all day, the sense of security suddenly disappeared. They get nervous and anxious. I don't know what separation means. Parents turned away, will they come back? Are these people friendly to these environments? What should I do? All this is full of uncertainty for them.

Crying, pestering, unwilling to leave, and not wanting their parents to leave are the behaviors they take to seek a sense of belonging. In our opinion, it is wrong for them to do so, but in their view, they have no other way. So it is often after a period of adaptation, from a week to a month, that they determine that the original separation is temporary. They still belong to this family, and this family still needs them. When the sense of belonging is satisfied, it is no longer necessary to cry and pester.

With children's anxiety about entering the park, many parents are as anxious as their children. Parents should first have a good attitude. If you are anxious, your state will definitely make children feel it and affect them. Many times, we underestimate the adaptability of children, and the one who doesn't adapt may be ourselves. Anyway, calm down.

Parents have several common misunderstandings when dealing with their children's anxiety:

Myth 1: Encourage children through comparison. Some parents like to say, don't cry. You should be brave! What is there to cry about? What a pity! -children's feelings: I am not good, I am not as good as others. Mom and dad love others and don't love me.

Myth 2: blindly reason, regardless of children's feelings. You have grown up, and you want to go to kindergarten to play with the children. You can't cry like this. -Children's feelings: I am not a good boy. When I grow up, I feel uncomfortable at all, and I have no right to cry.

Myth 3: scare and cajole children and stop them crying in time. If you cry again, the wolf will come for you. Don't cry, mom will come back after shopping. -the child's feelings: extreme fear, and then found that this is not the case, no longer trust adults!

I was fooled at that time, but I destroyed the most important thing between you, trust.

Myth 4: Conditional exchange. Be good, don't cry. I'll take you to buy your favorite car toys in the evening. Children's feelings: you can get toys when you go to kindergarten. My mother bought me a car this time. I can have another one next time.

When we say accept emotions, we don't mean indulge them. If you haven't taught children how to express their emotions before, start now. Start with yourself. There was a topic to share before. Let's take a look at it: parent-child communication (3)-emotion: empathy, easily coping with Xiong Haizi who lost his temper.

Here is a simple arrangement: empathize with children's emotions in three steps.

1) Identify children's emotions. -"You're sad, aren't you?" "I can see that you are in a hurry now."

2) Find out the reasons for the emotional relationship with children. -"You are sad because you are leaving your mother." "You're in a hurry, afraid of mother go don't come back. Really? "

3) solve the problem through consultation. -Focus on solving problems and make children feel better. "Mom knows that you are sad and don't want to be separated from your mother. So, will it feel better if mom hugs you? " "How about a magic kiss?" "When you miss your mother, you can hug this little rabbit." "Do you want to hug for another three minutes or five minutes?" These all focus on how to make children feel better. There is no reason, no cajoling and concessions, only understanding and respect.

Special time is a very good way to relieve separation anxiety, and it is also a good way that we can usually use to improve parent-child relationship.

You can pick up and drop off the kindergarten at special times, after your parents come home from work, or before going to bed. You agree at any time, and once you agree, you can't cancel it easily. Children will judge how important you are to this matter according to cancellation. This is a promise between you. If there are special circumstances, you must communicate with your child in advance and negotiate alternatives. It must be a very relaxing and enjoyable parent-child trip to enjoy your special time with your children at that time every day. You will find that the relationship with children is getting more and more harmonious, and the trust between them is getting stronger and stronger.

If possible, try to take your children to kindergarten by yourself. This pick-up hour is also a "special time" with children.

The power of picture books should not be underestimated. Any time, if you have a problem, think about picture books. The Magic Kiss is a must-have picture book for every family.

Until today, my daughter and I will give each other a magical kiss when we break up. We will put this kiss in our mouth and put it in our hearts.

A day in kindergarten is also a picture book that my daughter likes.

These picture books are about small animals in kindergarten who are reluctant to part with their parents and have separation anxiety. It truly describes the child's psychology at that time. I think this is the treasure of these picture books. Although there is a bad feeling, we can overcome it. Truth, no cajoling, no inducements.

There are many picture books, and the time for parent-child reading is also the time to help children build a sense of security and cultivate a good parent-child relationship. Besides, reading can bring so many benefits. You don't have to go to kindergarten to buy these books. Looking ahead, children will have better psychological construction. There are many similar picture books, such as Guess how much I love you. As long as the children like it.

Hello, thank you for reading. I'm Li, and I'm committed to child psychology and family education. Share with your heart and grow together.

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