The family upbringing of Lin Daiyu and Xue Baochai determines that their upbringing is absolutely different. Xue Baochai received a typical Confucian education, and Baochai was vulgar in nature. The education she received made her develop a stable, calm, respectful, considerate, smooth and forbearing character. Xue Baochai won the hearts of the people and was praised by the Jia family, but he didn't win the heart of Jia Baoyu. Lin Daiyu's talent is the highest in flowers of war, which stems from her family education. Lin Daiyu is born with a noble family and a woman's demeanor, which Xue Baochai can't learn.

Jia Min, Lin Daiyu's mother, is the best child in the Jia family. Lin Daiyu inherited her mother's genes well. Lin Daiyu's father, Lin Ruhai, was a romantic writer and a scholar appointed by the monarch. His scholarship was absolutely first-class at that time. Neither of these two daughters can be bad. Under their guidance, Lin Daiyu became pure and poetic.

Xue Baochai is not as well brought up as Lin Daiyu. Although the Xue family is also a rich family, Xue Baochai has no father since childhood. Xue Baochai's mother, Aunt Xue, is notoriously bitter. Her personality is also vividly displayed in A Dream of Red Mansions. She was mean to Xiangling and calculated Lin Daiyu, which all showed her character. Xue Baochai grew up in this environment, which is the fundamental reason why she finally developed the world.

In the Jia family, Xue Baochai's personality is more popular with everyone. Lin Daiyu's personal accomplishment is very high, but it is difficult to integrate into this big family, in other words, it is difficult to get along with them. Many people think Baochai is hypocritical, but in fact she is just trying to protect herself. We can't just accuse Xue Baochai of hypocrisy. After all, we must first learn to survive in such an environment.