According to human development, female is about 9 years old; Men begin to have "secondary sexual characteristics" around the age of 1 1, and formally enter the so-called "puberty". At this time, parents are ready to talk about sex and love with their children, teach them the meaning of growth, or be ashamed to remain silent. However, in the face of the readily available media environment, children's "sex education" and "gender education" have been quietly carried out in their infancy. Parents should not only teach their children the differences in sexual physiology, but also teach their children the "respect, love, privacy and responsibility" of gender education. Infants and young children also have sexual awareness! ? "My baby's * * * occasionally get an erection? My baby began to tease my little brother with his hands! Ordinary parents are often shocked to hear this. In fact, this is a normal physiological reaction of children unconsciously. Mao, an associate professor in the Department of Early Childhood Care of the School of Economics, Management and Health, pointed out that there are empirical data that this is a normal phenomenon in the development of infants and young children, and even studies have pointed out that the fetus will have an erectile reaction in the mother's womb. Kinsey, a famous sexologist, pointed out that babies are born with an instinctive reaction to explore sexual organs, and children over one year old may get a further sense of happiness by rubbing the external genitals. Once some parents see their baby's behavior, their first reaction is not only surprise, but also loudly reprimand their children. In this panic, it is easy for children to regard this as guilt or arouse more interest. In this regard, Associate Professor Mao said: "At present, the data generally tend to show that babies have no sexual desire, sexual impulse and sexual consciousness, but they will have sexual reactions and sexual curiosity, and the former are mostly involuntary normal reactions. The latter is mostly because of curiosity and fun. Children's curiosity about sex is the same as their curiosity about other things. Parents who adjust their mentality and are no longer ashamed to hear about "sexual curiosity" should stop panicking at this time. Mao, an associate professor, explained: "Children's curiosity about sex is exactly the same as their curiosity about other things. At this time, children always explore with natural curiosity, which is regarded as a primitive driving force and an internal driving force without learning. Associate Professor Mao further explained that the original driving force is divided into "physiological driving force" and "psychological driving force", and the physiological driving force is related to survival and reproduction; Psychological driving force is children's curiosity about the surrounding environment, and they can understand and adapt to the environment through exploration and interaction with the environment. And "sex" occupies a place in children's development and life, and naturally becomes a part of children's curious exploration. On the other hand, reproductive organs are the most obvious physiological differences between children of different sexes before the emergence of the second sexual characteristics. Mao, an associate professor, pointed out that children show high interest and want to explore their bodies so as to understand their differences. In addition, the feeling of touching the reproductive organs will make children feel different, and some children even like this feeling, and the meaning behind this feeling is usually irrelevant. Freudian sexual psychological development period: babies born by breastfeeding are satisfied and happy through sucking. Anal desire period: about one and a half years old children enter this stage and get * * * sex through excretory activities. Sexual organ stage: it appears after about three years old, and children begin to like to play with sexual organs and are curious about body structure. In addition to understanding that the baby's sexual curiosity has nothing to do with * * *, Associate Professor Mao said, "On the contrary, it is the overreaction of adults that will scare children or make them feel that this is a strange move. For younger children, parents usually only need to state a simple and specific fact, such as children are curious about why boys and girls go to the toilet in different ways. At this point, parents only need to answer: "Boys and girls have different structures, so the way to go to the toilet is different." "Yes, children will ask again if they don't understand." But before answering, adults must clarify: "What does the child want to ask? Associate Professor Mao said to me. This is because different children will ask different questions. For example, children's curiosity about sex often has nothing to do with sexual physiological desires, and sometimes children simply want an answer. Many adults will also have questions: "to what extent should I answer?" "At this time, please give it to your child to make a decision. Parents can ask their children first: "How did you come up with this question? Judging from the process of children's explanation, they usually know what children really want to know. In addition, Associate Professor Mao reminded us that the important core values of sex education are "love, respect, privacy and responsibility". On the one hand, adults should satisfy children's curiosity; On the one hand, we should provide the values behind it to children. For example, if children have different ways of going to the toilet for boys and girls, adults will integrate the concepts of respect and privacy after explaining "why should the toilet be closed". Because we don't want others to see you, you have to close the door when you go to the toilet and you can't disturb others. Combining the concepts of love, respect, privacy and responsibility is the real meaning of sex education. Mom and Dad, where am I from? When a child asks you in a childish voice, "Where am I from? At this time, don't start to tell your child helplessly, "When the egg hits, you just …" or blush and learn the old lines on TV and say to your child, "You picked it up from the trash can. And the incredible "you jumped out of the stone." Remember, we are not the Monkey King in folk novels, nor Momotaro in story books who delivered peaches by caesarean section. Even if the child asks this question, it has nothing to do with sexual and physiological desires. "Sometimes children just want to make sure that' I was born to you', and the key point is to clarify the problems behind the children. Associate Professor Mao Dui explained where I come from. The same problem, but the motivation behind it may not be exactly the same. Therefore, parents are encouraged to remember to ask the motives behind their children's questions and even give an affirmation, "Yes, you were born to me. Give a concept of love. You are my dearest baby. Often all problems will be solved. Associate Professor Mao said that some answers are too abstract and beyond children's comprehension, such as the combination of * * * eggs. It is often that adults provide children with too much information, or they don't make their children's problems clear, so children are confused. The more complicated adults think, the more complicated the problem will be. Being caught in an endless loop of problems will only increase people's troubles. Therefore, "go back to the center of the child, care about what the child really wants to know, and pay attention to and clarify the child's problems. Adults don't have to worry that children don't understand, and they don't have to deliberately avoid such questions, so that children are willing to ask you such questions again and parent-child interaction can continue. In this way, when will the child's * * * hope appear? Associate Professor Mao said that at present, it is advocated to appear around puberty. Before the second grade of primary school, it is generally believed that there are many curious and fun elements about sex. Besides being sexually assaulted, watching porn, or having other special experiences in children's lives, there will be special confusion. In addition, once the content of sex education in the media is beyond the child's understanding, he will be confused, and once this confusion cannot be alleviated, it will affect the child's body and mind. Call on the mass society to jointly protect children and create a healthy environment for the next generation. Give a concept of love "You are my dearest baby". Gender education for boys? Girls? The knowledge of the construction of biology and health education textbooks has taught us to understand the organ structure scientifically, but forgot to teach us to learn to accept, respect and tolerate multiple sexes. "Sex" refers to the difference in physiological structure; "Gender" is a word used in psychology and society. The word "gender" has long been expressed by the old associate professor Mao. In the past, we thought that gender was only boys and girls, so we called it gender. In addition, the physiological gender, psychological gender and social gender should be consistent, that is to say, they are physically boys, and their psychology and behavior should also show the appearance of boys, which is in line with the expectations of the society for boys. However, this is the past saying. Once a boy is a boy physically, his psychology and behavior are feminine, and it is easy to be labeled as "gender perversion". What's more, Chen will still have such words as sissy and man-woman, but this is totally wrong and inappropriate narrow prejudice. "Now it's not called gender, but gender for short. Associate Professor Mao explained. The meaning of gender means that an individual has physiological gender, social gender and psychological gender, and various combinations can be allowed between these three levels, showing various faces. So from the perspective of gender, there will be no problem of hanging upside down. Because the inverted sentence is considered negative, it means "you are wrong, so you need to be corrected, adjusted and corrected." Every child, even everyone's combination of physical gender, psychological gender and social gender may be consistent or inconsistent. Associate Professor Mao pointed out: "It is more important to explore whether there are' gender role stereotypes' or' gender discrimination' in adults' attitudes and ways of raising children. In other words, adults themselves have rigid or narrow views on gender, and use this framework to limit children's gender roles and learning possibilities. Furthermore, if adults think what boys should look like, they will cultivate boys with established concepts and attitudes, and the toys for children are all adults' choices. If children adapt properly, they will grow up according to adults' expectations. If children can't adapt, there will be many situations. Associate Professor Mao said that in the past, people thought that children should be corrected immediately once they had sex inversion, but now it seems that this is a wrong concept. On the contrary, do adults and the whole society provide enough, rich, diverse and positive gender learning resource networks for children to grow and learn in an inclusive environment and conditions? Assuming that this is a mutually respectful and pluralistic upbringing environment, children will eventually find the most comfortable gender model, instead of trying to correct children with the label of gender inversion. On the other hand, in the process of children's growth, adults have to think: "Is it because their narrow definition of gender limits children's learning possibilities or makes them feel uncomfortable? "Although the physical gender is male, the heart belongs to a more feminine, sensitive and delicate character. This is the way to make children comfortable. Adults and society should learn to accept, respect and tolerate. Associate Professor Mao said that gender education is an important part of children's socialization, and the influence of caregivers around is very important. Try to provide an environment and conditions of gender respect, and finally respect children to find their most comfortable way. Now it's not called "gender" but "gender" for short. Respect for gender begins at an early age, but how do adults know if they are providing a diverse and respectful growth environment for their children? Associate Professor Mao said that from the simplest definition, there are generally instrumental personality and social personality, and instrumental personality is more goal-oriented; Social character belongs to interpersonal communication and sensitivity. In the past, the way of educating boys provided more instrumental personality; Do not encourage social personality, such as obvious differences in the choice of basic toys, give boys knives, guns, cars and other toys; Girls will get dolls and other toys that belong to social roles. However, parents are advised to provide rich exploration opportunities for their children. Even if he is a boy, some parents will not give toys such as dolls, but this will break the social character that enriches children's care. In addition, at present, some multi-sex people in society should also let their children learn to respect and tolerate. Associate Professor Mao said that at present, children's gender development process is still based on "gender schema theory", and "cognitive development" and "social culture" jointly affect the development of children's gender roles. It is worth noting that although children's concept of gender is not fully mature, because there is too much direct information about gender in society, children have actually begun to learn. Now that we have started learning, gender education should be brought into our lives at any time. Finally, Associate Professor Mao pointed out that providing children with rich and sufficient games and toys is not limited to the learning or exploration experience of children by adults' narrow gender concept. Respecting gender does not value boys but despise girls. Once parents start buying toys for their children, gender education begins! Mao Education: Department of Human and Family Development, National Taiwan Province Normal University. Doctoral experience: Associate Professor of the Department of Early Childhood Care, School of Economics, Management and Health, and Director of Taiwan Province Sex Education Society. Current position: Associate Professor, Department of Child Care, School of Economics, Management and Health, Director of Taiwan Province Sex Education Society.