Finalized: Xixi

The competition in today's society is very fierce. So many young parents are busy with work and can't take care of their families and careers. In order to relieve their pressure, they choose to give their children to their elders for help. However, in fact, this is undoubtedly a gamble for parents. Although I have temporarily obtained a relatively relaxed living environment, it has added a little risk to my children's future life.

Mr. Wang is engaged in the Internet industry in first-tier cities. Under the great pressure of 996, he often works overtime. It's nearly midnight to drag my tired body home every day. His wife works in a foreign company, so she is inevitably too busy to take care of her family. So after discussion, Mr. and Mrs. Wang decided to send their four-year-old son back to his hometown in Shandong to be taken care of by his grandparents.

As soon as the son was sent away, the couple were greatly relieved. Agree to the cause of hard work, realize economic freedom at an early date, and take my son back to Beijing. Two years later, the child reached the age of primary school. Considering the poor teaching quality in their hometown, the couple want to take their children back to Beijing. Unexpectedly, not only the elderly are unwilling, but also the children are alienated from their parents, crying to stay at their grandparents' home and not want to go back to Beijing.

In fact, many young parents, like Mr. and Mrs. Wang, have passed on the responsibility of taking care of their children to their parents at home out of personal work needs and the pursuit of an independent lifestyle. However, due to the differences in educational concepts between the two generations, intergenerational conflicts often arise about how to raise children.

The older generation often loves their grandchildren very much, and this love even goes far beyond their sons. Many parents can be very strict when educating their children, but they have no principles when facing their grandchildren. Children who live in such a bottomless environment for a long time can easily develop a self-centered character and lose their self-care ability.

Intergenerational education often produces some contradictions, which are caused by the different values and educational views of the two generations. However, family is not a reasonable place. Once there is a conflict between two generations, the one who wins in the end is often the one with the loudest voice.

In other words, whoever is more unreasonable will win the war at home. This contradictory and unreasonable family environment is not suitable for children's growth, and it is easy to leave a shadow on children's psychology.

In many families, the two generations have a harmonious relationship and respect each other. Once children's education problems are mixed with them, there will often be many contradictions and family relations will be challenged. Often because a small matter as a fuse, constantly involved, leading to major contradictions. It leads to a tense family relationship atmosphere, which makes adults and children living in it feel psychological pressure.

Parents should spend as much time with their children as possible, even if they can't shirk their work, they can only entrust their children to their elders for help and care, and they can't let go completely. Still have to keep a fixed frequency to accompany your child. In daily life, you often express your concern and love for your children through telephone, video and other communication methods. You can't enjoy life just because your elders help you with your children, but leave the responsibility entirely to your elders.

When young parents get along with their children, they need to express their concern clearly, so that children can intuitively realize that their parents love them. Don't let children have psychological problems because they doubt their parents' love. Once a child lacks a sense of security, it will have many adverse effects on both character building and mental state.

Young parents need to uphold a principle when communicating with their elders, that is, everything is based on the health of their children. In fact, even if there are differences in education between the two generations, the ultimate goal is for the good of children. Therefore, when young parents have educational differences with their elders, they should think more about their children, be more patient and increase mutual communication and understanding.

When young parents and two generations of elders actively express their love for their children and put the interests of their children first, many contradictions can be resolved. Especially as young people, we are better than the previous generation in education and cultural literacy. In the face of contradictions, we should actively seek reconciliation with our elders and jointly create an atmosphere suitable for children's growth.

When two generations have conflicts, they can argue with each other and give their reasons. However, it should be noted that this kind of quarrel should not happen in front of children, otherwise it will form a serious psychological shadow on children and make them feel the tension of family relations. When there are differences in educational attitudes, they can be discussed in private.

No matter whether there are contradictions between the two sides or whether the contradictions have escalated. Young parents should do it and don't spit on each other for the sake of their children. On the one hand, it is necessary to maintain the harmony of family relations, on the other hand, it is also necessary to give children a good demonstration, and don't let children feel that it is a matter of course to vomit others behind their backs.

Young parents need to understand more about the emotions of the older generation when dealing with conflicts with their elders. Due to their own experience and cultural limitations, many of their educational concepts are traditional. Even with rich parenting experience, I am unwilling to accept advanced concepts. Young people can try to communicate with their elders and recommend some professional books for them to learn.

Wang Jisheng, doctoral supervisor of China Academy of Sciences, said: "The voice of criticizing intergenerational education is because people demand more from their children than ever before."

With the development of the times, today's children are under much greater learning pressure than the previous generation, and they need to learn more. It is far from grandparents' generation, so the difference in educational ideas caused by different educational needs is actually an inevitable phenomenon. Young people should try their best to adjust their lives, spend more time with their children, and don't completely abandon their children to their parents. After all, for children, parents' words and deeds are the most important lesson in life.

Have you ever asked your elders for help? How do you deal with the contradiction of intergenerational education? Welcome to leave a message for discussion.