Gender identity is established before the age of 3. After the age of 3, with the development of language ability, thinking ability and emotional complexity, children gradually realize their gender identity in the family and the world around them.
Is the baby sexually aware?
Sometimes we can see that a few-month-old boy will have a spontaneous erection of his penis when breastfeeding. With the increase of sucking frequency, the baby's face will turn red, and the muscles of the whole body will contract rhythmically, followed by a relaxation after satisfaction.
The whole process is similar to the sexual excitement of adults. It has also been reported that baby girls have similar vaginal discharge increase and vaginal rhythmic contraction. As for seven or eight months old babies, they often touch their genitals and do some leg-pinching actions. The above facts show that babies are sexually conscious.
Do the children have them?
Sexual experience
A parent wrote that he has a lively and lovely daughter, 4 years old, but I don't know when she started to develop a strange habit, which annoyed her parents.
She always likes to rub her pussy on the bed or other similar objects. After rubbing your face, you will be red and your eyes will be straight. Does a 4-year-old girl have sexual desire? This involves how to treat children's sexual desire.
A similar situation happened in other families. Parents should understand that psychological development is continuous, and the function of some sexual organs in the body as sexual excitement areas does not exist before puberty, but is potential.
This function can be induced as long as there is suitable stimulation in the environment. The occasional stimulation of children in daily life can sometimes induce the feeling of the excited area of the body, which in turn leads to the pursuit of this pleasure.
In essence, children's sexual games are different from adults' sexual desires. Children can accept external sexual information or sexual stimulation, but they can't understand it and can't realize it internally.
Children's sex games are mostly non-sexual, such as entertainment and making friends. Therefore, we can neither turn a blind eye to children's sex games nor exaggerate them too much. We should base ourselves on education and help children develop smoothly.
Correctly guide children through the "sexual bud"
Children around 3 years old are in a special stage of sexual psychological development, which is called "sexual budding period" in psychology. If parents are not properly educated at this stage, children's sexual psychological development will be frustrated and have a far-reaching negative impact.
In the "sexual budding period", children's sexual psychology can have the following characteristics:
Sexual curiosity When children begin to realize the difference between men and women, they may be curious and want to see what the genitals of the opposite sex are like.
If parents find out that their children have this kind of behavior, don't beat and scold them, otherwise, girls will easily have the concept of "sexual guilt", sexual apathy will easily occur in adulthood, boys will easily have rebellious psychology, and voyeurism will easily occur in adulthood.
Sexual pride When boys find that they have a penis and girls don't, some boys will deliberately "show off" in front of adults, such as patting their urine high in front of relatives and friends to show that they are proud of having a penis.
If parents find that their children have such behavior, they should not beat and scold. They can calmly and naturally remind children not to urinate in public. If it is not handled properly, the child's rebellious psychology will be suppressed, and it is easy to appear "exposure addiction" in adulthood.
The child masturbates. Children around 3 years old often begin to have great interest in their genitals, and can get pleasure from playing with them, thus producing masturbation habits.
If parents find that their children have this bad habit, they will neither panic nor curse. Doing so is often not only useless, but harmful, and it is easy for children to have the concept of "sex crime" because of psychological shock. Adult impotence or frigidity is often related to this.
Parents should clearly tell boys to be men like their fathers when they grow up, and tell girls to be women like their mothers when they grow up.
Don't dress up boys as girls and girls as boys according to your own "wishes", otherwise children may have gender identity confusion and become gay, transvestite and transgender when they grow up.
How to treat children's sexual activities
Children's sexual activities are unconscious, unstable and even blind. Parents should take appropriate measures to help their children correct.
Don't let the child sleep with his parents in the same bed, lest the parents inadvertently touch the child's sexual excitement area during the child's sleep and cause the child's sexual feelings.
Children's activities should be rich, diverse and interesting. Cultivate children's diverse interests and hobbies, and let children put their mind and energy into activities they are interested in, such as painting and playing intellectual games.
Try to reduce the stimulation of induced activities in the environment, parents should obey the rules, children's underwear should be loose, and children should not be allowed to engage in stimulation that may stimulate sexy parts, such as climbing trees and holding pillows.
For older children, parents can appropriately impart some sexual knowledge, give more guidance in the usual conversation, and explain fertility, love and other phenomena with stories and metaphors.
When parents find that children have sex games such as watching and touching each other, they should stop them in time, but pay attention to the methods, don't scold or beat and scold, explain the truth and guide them correctly.
If children really can't overcome this bad habit and affect their normal life, parents should contact doctors to find out the root causes and eliminate hidden dangers.
When children ask sexual questions, parents should take advantage of this situation to do the following:
1. When children ask questions about sex, they should answer them lightly, without cheating, shyness or mystery. Because children's sexual problems are often random, without careful consideration and malicious thoughts, parents should understand this and naturally answer questions frankly. The embarrassment and shyness of parents can only increase children's curiosity, make children worry about the questions they ask and keep them in mind.
2. Explain the genitals of men and women in scientific terms, and tell children how to protect them, and don't play casually. When answering children's questions, don't exceed their curiosity and understanding ability. Answer specific questions, not too deep and too detailed, but easy to understand and full of confidence.
3. Be firm, decisive, concise and clear when answering questions, and show authoritative and conclusive meaning in your tone. Don't extend it, and it is not appropriate to encourage children to trigger associations.
In short, when parents answer their children's sexual questions, the language and expression should be just right and natural.