# Me and Li # Notes 03 The Debate over Family Rights

Debate on family rights (1)

1. Many of our own behaviors are subconscious problems.

2. The hidden power struggle of the family: insist on changing what children do and ignore what children should do.

3. Bite your nails-you need to pay attention to him, or you pay too much attention. You need to change, or you have perfectionist expectations.

4. When there is a power struggle, love disappears, power struggle disappears, and love appears.

5. Stick to what you need to do and what you like to do.

6. The original self-righteous communication is to earn rights with children, bully children and disrespect them.

7. Really understand the child's heart and act in parallel.

It turns out that self-righteous communication is to fight for rights with children, bully the small with the big and disrespect the children.

8. Parents talk to their children by command and coercion, which is the cause of the dispute over family rights. They have no respect for children and have no eyes for them.

9. Parents control their rights, don't respect their children, and order their children to be forced to threaten them, and children will confront their parents.

10, the child has no friends and is lonely:

1) didn't learn to make friends.

2) There is no self-confidence in the bones

1 1. The key to solving family problems is to change yourself first.

12, praise the child from the heart, don't care about the child's reaction to you, improve the right of communication, praise the place, praise the specific behavior.

13, I didn't find happiness from persistence, but found a sense of accomplishment from persistence.

14, the characteristics of power struggle:

1) has a strong tone.

2) insist that you are right. Whether it's for the children's sake or for their own reputation. This is a good excuse for the sake of children. The struggle for parental rights will aggravate children's anger.

The struggle for power intensifies children's rebellion;

1. Full of anger and injustice.

2. The child is out of control and feels that he has accomplished nothing.

3. Feeling unloved will make children feel sad and depressed.

Psychology will get stuck in childhood. I feel unloved, my heart is stuck in my childhood, and I have a child in my heart.

Never be a rescuer. Rescuers work too hard.

How to change:

1, the power struggle represents the inner needs of parents and children.

2. Maintain rules and bottom lines with power. When children are in danger, they must use their strength.

There are three things in life:

1. God's business-obedience;

2. Other people's business-accept respect;