The company of parents is the best education.
There are also many parents who believe that only children living in rural areas are left-behind children. In fact, there is also a lot of potential in the city? Pseudo-single parent family? What about left-behind children? When parents are at home, they seem to live under the same roof? Tenant? . Children's lack of communication and companionship with their parents is often the real reason for children to develop bad habits and poor academic performance.
Phenomenon: children who are only busy with business? Problem children?
Son of citizen Ms. Sun, now 10 years old. He is in the third grade in a primary school in Jinshui District. He didn't listen carefully in class, and his grades were the lowest in the class. What bothers teachers most is that they often have some friction with their classmates, and once they cut their faces. There are some communication problems between Han Xiao and his classmates.
The class teacher communicated with her parents, Ms. Sun, many times, but these problems could not be solved. Ms. Sun, a parent, also expressed her difficulties: because the family is doing business, her husband travels abroad all the year round and can stay at home for a few days a year. She is too busy doing business at home to take care of the children. Seeing the child like this, she can't control it if she wants to.
According to Han Xiao's class teacher, this situation exists in every class, and the class teacher is also very headache.
Analysis: Are there many cities? Pseudo-single parent family?
The popularity of the internet has facilitated people's communication, narrowed the distance between people, but alienated their loved ones.
Many parents think that only children living in rural areas are left-behind children, and there are also a large number of left-behind children in cities? Pseudo-single parent family? What about left-behind children? When parents are at home, they seem to live under the same roof? Tenant? Either parents and children play games by themselves, or adults go out early and come back late, and they don't see their children all day.
In this way, just like the real family where left-behind children grow up, there is only one result, that is, the parent-child relationship is gradually alienated and indifferent, which invisibly damages the healthy growth of children.
Although most schools will take corresponding measures to care about correcting their problems, teachers show little concern for those particularly rebellious children, and even some children will be reluctantly given up by teachers in the end.
Some parents are busy with work or business, and occasionally have time to accompany their children. Almost the only concern is their children's academic performance. It is easy for children to get good grades in school, but if they don't, parents will criticize them? Most of the time, this kind of parent-child time is spent? Scold the child? Go to the top, because children with few parents have a high probability of poor academic performance.
Tips: Parents are actually a profession.
Liu Junmin, chairman of the leading right brain chain headquarters, said: American psychologists have found that 20% of a person's achievement depends on his acquired efforts and 80% depends on his parents' teaching. This is enough to show the important role of family education.
In real life, although everyone knows? Parents are children's first teachers? That's true, but at present, many families are seriously lacking in family education, which may make it difficult for children to go to school, and may even become a direct problem at school? Problem children? .
In fact, there is an indispensable stage in every child's growth process, that is? Accompany. Because many non-intellectual factors in the process of children's growth need parents' words and deeds to complete. For example: the cultivation of emotion, the shaping of personality, the cultivation of habits, as well as responsibility and self-confidence.
In a sense, parents are actually a profession. Unfortunately, many parents are incompetent in this profession. Although they have a successful career, their success cannot make up for the failure of family education.
Parents are advised that there is only one chance to educate their children to grow up. Don't miss it! It is a great mistake to give up the responsibility of accompanying and educating children!
The company of parents is the best education.
Every weekend, parents want to spend more time with their children. It is often said that companionship is the longest confession, and accompanying children is not just as simple as playing with them or taking them out for a trip. How to carry out high-quality companionship has a deep knowledge. As the saying goes, companionship is the best family education. That's true. Only companionship can make children feel deep affection. Today, we are going to share with Chen Qianlin, a senior family education expert? Parenting classics? Let's see how the principal who sent two children to a world-renowned school for doctoral studies accompanied the children.
First, the younger a child is, the more inseparable he is from his parents.
Some parents, forced by life or busy with work, don't care about getting close to their children, or entrust their children to nannies or send their young children to boarding schools. There is no denying that some nannies are very responsible and experienced in parenting, but no matter how careful they are, their feelings for their children are not as good as those of their parents. The Anyang Experimental Primary School in XX, where I once worked, is a boarding primary school. In terms of habit formation and knowledge learning, schools can make a difference, but even the best schools can't make up for family ties. Mr. Cai, a fellow villager in Ruian, changed his name? Laughing until late, he made up his mind to educate his children, and as a result, he trained five doctors and 1 master, known as "genius magician". Mr Cai attaches great importance to children's affection. He once said: those fathers who only kiss their children's foreheads on weekend nights are dereliction of duty and even more failure! ? When my child was born, Mr. Cai's parenting story had been circulated in Ryan, which inspired me to take family education as my most important career. When I was a child for two hours, I worked in the Education Bureau of XX City and Anyang Experimental Primary School of XX City, and it was inevitable that I would have social intercourse. My principle is whether I can go or not, and go home as soon as possible. During this period, many leaders recommended me to work in the XX municipal government department, and I didn't want to leave the education work. I value my family more than promotion. Many times, I use beautiful lies to buy time for myself. When I am at home, I basically don't answer the landline at home, and all the calls are answered by mobile phones. Friends often call my mobile phone to invite me out for dinner, or so-and-so leaders are present. When these things are hard to refuse, I often say, "Sorry, I just went to XX." Wenzhou is more than 30 kilometers away from Ruian. There were no highways at that time. After more than an hour by car, people are not forced. I refused more, and it spread in the society that I went to XX for entertainment, rarely in Ryan, and fewer people asked me out. Looking back now, I am very happy to have more time with my two children.
As Lu Xun said, time is like water in a sponge. As long as you squeeze it, there will always be some. I regard family education as the top priority, which has won me too much company time.
Second, accompany the children, what are you accompanying? Accompanied by children, parent-child travel, parent-child reading and parent-child sports are relatively easy to do. It's a good thing for fathers to take their children out to travel more after the TV broadcast of "Where is Dad?". Traveling abroad can not only increase knowledge, but also have unexpected benefits to children's ability, emotional intelligence, habits and personality. When my children were young, I took them to Shanghai for the Spring Festival three times and gained a lot each time. Of course, traveling takes time and money after all. In fact, parents spend time with their children around the house, which is equivalent to a family education trip. Spending time with children reading is a low-cost way to accompany them. Reading is more than just learning knowledge. Parents and children studying together will not only set up a studious image for their children, but also have more common language with them. Loving sports can not only exercise, but also promote the formation of sunny personality. Sports are basically natural for children. Parents and children exercise together, and almost no child doesn't like it. If you have enough time to spend with your child, you can make more efforts in participating in children's games, guiding children to explore, and talking to children on an equal footing. I often participated in children's games when I was a child. For example, do? Wolf and sheep? Game: Father and son each hold a toy wolf and race with a toy sheep. Sheep? Is it? Wolf? Understand? Wolf? Say? If one of you can solve my problem, I will herd sheep. So reciting ancient poems, doing math problems and solving difficult problems in life become situational learning. This kind of happy learning itself is playing. ? Wolf? Still talking? Who can exercise for 20 minutes, I will herd sheep? , or? Who can draw a picture, I will let the sheep go? , or? Who can clean the living room floor, and I will let the sheep go? The two children also scrambled to do it. It is very appropriate to accompany children and explore with them in the lower grades of primary school. Children are always curious about the unknown world and often prefer to explore after school. Inquiry is a comprehensive learning process. Children are often whimsical and expect too much, and the result is often abandoned halfway. If parents can help their children explore, they can stimulate their enthusiasm for research. When they were young, the two children encountered some difficulties in doing research and often asked me for help. I'm happy to give it to them? Help? Catch some cockroaches, flies and so on. I have guided my children to read newspapers since they were 9 years old. Read Wenzhou Metropolis Daily and Wenzhou Evening News first, then Global Times. The two children read newspapers freely, know the sunny and dark sides of society from time to time, and lead the values through the dialogue between father and son. After reading the newspaper, there are more topics discussed between father and son. This companionship becomes a process of soul collision and communication.
At the beginning of children's adolescence, my companionship is mainly equal dialogue. Talk to children, as long as the children like the topic, we can talk. When children grow up, I ask them, "What is the biggest influence of dad's family education on you? What about the children? Equal dialogue "is one of the three most important experiences."
Third, how to make children like the company of their parents? It is naturally a good thing for parents to spend more time with their children. The problem is that parents are often disliked by their children. There are also some parents who have been controlling their children, and such companionship may have a negative impact. So, how to make children prefer the company of their parents? There is an educational knowledge here, which is to follow the combination of respect and requirements.
The company of parents is the best education.
Sponsored by China Women's Development Foundation and China Happy Family Series Organizing Committee? Good dad, class, national public welfare tour? What is the goal of this project? The importance of father's role in the family? The survey shows that 90% of children want their father to spend more time with them. 44% of fathers think that work is too busy, which leads to a decrease in parent-child activities; 23% fathers suffer from children always pestering themselves; 26% of fathers think that parent-child activities are too monotonous. Fathers often make mistakes in the way they accompany their children, such as stuffing their children with electronic products such as iPad for a long time, satisfying their material wishes without a bottom line, and constantly comparing their children with other children in the process of companionship.
How did my father answer these questions?
? I'm busy?
Whenever a child says:? Can you play with me for a while? Parents always answer:? I have no time to play with you. ? Due to work pressure or different life concepts, more and more? After 80? Parents hand over the responsibility of raising and accompanying their children to grandparents and other third parties.
? I don't understand, okay?
Parents often say: I don't know how to teach children. ? So, what do you think of sending children to the society to learn this and that? Investment funds? You can make up for your own shortcomings.
? I have company?
Just? Accompany? There is no intention to pay attention to and participate in children's activities around children.
One father is better than a hundred principals.
In fact, the value of parent-child companionship exceeds any education and training. It is not enough to give children material care. Sincere companionship and careful care are more important. The key words of parent-child companionship include interaction, respect, dialogue and understanding.
Companionship is the most important thing in the world, and the biggest problem for most parents is that they have no time. There is a saying in the book Poor Dad, Rich Dad: Success means having time to take care of children. ? Parent-child programs such as "Where's Dad?" make people generally pay attention to dads. The company is short of time? Didn't really pay attention? The quality of companionship is not high? . Have time to accompany, but also pay attention? Recessive. What else, please? Spiritual companionship? .
Implicit excuse means that parents have enough time to accompany their children, but leave psychologically because of lack of effective communication. The concrete manifestations are indifference, lack of trust and communication difficulties. Children who are invisible for a long time are prone to autism, irritability and communication barriers.
The best companionship is spiritual companionship, and a good relationship based on close emotional connection should be established between father and son. Communicate and communicate through true and inner feelings, convey love, trust and security, and promote understanding, care and trust. What is the intimate relationship between parents and children during their growth? Is that correct? Skills are more important! The love and trust that spiritual companionship conveys to children will affect their life.
? One father is better than 100 principals. ? No matter what reason a father has, it can't be an excuse to ignore his children. When the weather is fine, please ask dad to take the children and drive to other places for an outing; After the rain clears, please ask dad to take the children to find the rainbow in the distance; Let the father act as the child when the child has something on his mind? Intimate brother? ; When the child's exam results are not ideal, please ask dad to rebuild the lost confidence for the child. Even if you can't accompany your child day and night because of work, please accompany your child to grow up in other ways. For example, make a greeting call to your child every day, send a message of concern, and even leave a message online to exchange secrets that belong only to you two. Children's growth is fleeting, and fathers should not easily ignore the time of companionship. Of course, if you can stay with your child, please try to stay with your child, whether for the child or for the father. The happiest time? .
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