Tips for Good Parents to Educate Their Children 1: Respect Children as Adults.
As adults, we have long understood the importance of respecting others, which may be summed up from many failures. Now, what we need to do is to respect your children like other adults, and help them like themselves, appreciate themselves and establish a positive self-image through your care, listening, appreciation, support and sincere treatment.
This respect is often reflected in the nuances, respecting his opinions, respecting his friends, and even respecting his favorite toys. Try to remember what your child said to you, because this may be the most important thing for him for a while; Before changing kindergartens and nannies for children, it is best to give them a chance to choose and let them have a look first; If your child does well in the exam, please resist the urge to make it public for the first time and let the child tell everyone himself? It should be said that beautiful parents do not exist, but parents in any family can find ways to satisfy and respect their children. Letting your children believe that they are important and unique is one of the best gifts that parents can give their children.
point out
1, don't take the identity of parents too seriously. Without this special sense of identity, your child may grow up happier;
Don't make fun of your child when he thinks it's serious.
If a child tells you a secret, you must keep your mouth shut for him.
Deception 2: Know your child's personality and keep it in mind.
The essence of being a good parent is to really understand the child's personality and adjust your methods of educating children accordingly. No two children are exactly the same, so try to understand the baby's personality and treat him in the way that suits him best, which will minimize difficulties and contradictions.
Give a simple example: if your child is excitable, then you should avoid doing strenuous exercise with him at night, otherwise it will make it difficult for him to fall asleep; On the contrary, you can do some relatively quiet activities to help him get sleepy. Perhaps, your child has some difficulties in changing state and mood, so you should give a hint in advance before leaving the playground, so that you may feel better when you put it into action. So-called? Teaching students in accordance with their aptitude? This will save you a lot of trouble.
point out
1, if your daughter looks like a tomboy or your son likes to play with dolls, you don't have to make a fuss;
2. Understand the things and reasons that children use to show off, and let them find out what they think is the most valuable;
Don't think too much about what children should look like at every age.
Trick 3: family time is preferred.
Parents are always worried that their children will fall behind others, so a 3 or 4-year-old child's schedule may be more full than his parents'. Music class, art class, fitness class? Children become slaves to the curriculum and parents become slaves to their children. We can't say that happy and full family time is more important than beneficial study, but family time should be given priority. A family picnic may delay children's piano lessons, but they are still so young, just a child without any task indicators. How much do they need? Children? Time!
You can design some activities that the whole family can do at the same time and stick to it. It doesn't matter what you do, as long as it can promote communication and contact feelings. Like telling a story every night? You tell him or he tells you; Cooking together on weekends? She may just help you throw the selected leaves into the garbage basket; Set up a tent in the living room at the end of each month, with the whole family inside? In short, camping should be a child's favorite activity, and you and your baby can enjoy it.
Tip:
1, when there is conflict between work and life, try to choose life;
2. If the child is very happy about a family activity, you should never take canceling the activity as punishment;
3. Communicate your dreams with your children.
Deception 4: Be a good example.
We should try to ask ourselves every night:? What did my children learn from me today? Because our most common mistake is to say one thing and do another? We teach our children to be patient and know how to control themselves, but we will quarrel loudly with others on the road; We tell our children not to talk about others behind their backs, but judge ourselves at the dinner table? ; We asked them to tell the truth, but lied that our children were only 6 years old and escaped the park tickets.
It is not that parents must be perfect, but we hope that children can sum up their experiences and learn lessons from their own gains and losses. For example, if you take it out on your child because of your unsatisfactory work, you should take the initiative to tell him afterwards? I shouldn't have yelled at you like that just now. I apologize to you, baby! ? In doing so, you teach your children respect and understanding; If you are encountering a challenging new environment, you should let your children see that you will do your best towards your goal; If you encounter great setbacks (such as layoffs), you should give your children confidence and let them control the existing difficulties, because all your actions will be the best example for your children.
point out
1, the attitude between parents towards each other is closely related to the way children treat others;
2. Don't promise what you can't do;
Remember to say goodbye to your children when you leave.
Deception 5: Encourage exploration and discovery.
Children like exploring very much, which has become one of the important ways for them to learn things. What if parents talk endlessly? Don't touch that! ? Stay away from that! ? At this time, children will gradually hold a fear and retreat attitude towards the unknown; When children explore the world, if they can get positive responses from their parents, they can extend their tentacles longer and approach a broader life.
The most important thing parents can do is to ensure that your children can benefit from exploration and discovery. First of all, get rid of the hidden dangers in your room and make sure that children are everywhere? Wandering? You won't get hurt. Then, you can pay more attention to the daily schedule, so that the baby can have new things to explore and learn wherever he goes. Exploration can be very simple, for example, let him study the texture of all kinds of leather shoes in the closet; Let her play with pots and pans in the kitchen; Take him to taste local flavors and eating methods; Take her to a museum, zoo or exhibition hall? If a child is encouraged to explore and discover actively in infancy, he may be keen on discovering life all his life.
point out
1, don't laugh at the world imagined by children;
No matter how insignificant your child's success is, you should celebrate.
3. Prepare a backup plan for the child's possible failure and encourage him to come again.
Cheat 6: Give clear instructions and stick to them.
Studies have shown that children from well-educated families will thrive, because good rules and regulations will make children feel more secure and teach them self-control and self-confidence. As adults, we don't like being told what to do and what not to do, so we think children will also react negatively to the rules. In fact, children need parents who have clear instructions and will not change their minds at any time. Speaking of casual change of heart, this may be a problem that many parents ignore. In fact, every family has its own small rules, but what parents often overlook is that they often modify the rules at any time according to their temporary feelings. As a result, the child is at a loss and then disdains the rules.
So, why are you at home? Promulgated? What about these rules? Maybe you are a manager who can give orders at work, but not at home. The most effective way is, first, the rules you set are reasonable, and second, you tell him in a warm way.
point out
1, remember those things you swore not to do to your children when you were growing up;
2. Children really need some standards and formulate some encouraging and supportive rules;
If your child does violate the rules, don't make excuses for him to bear the consequences of his actions.
Deception 7: Tell your child how much you love him.
The simplest and most important thing you can do for your child is to let him know how much you love and care about him, how happy you are when he is happy, and how worried you are when he is in danger. Research shows that often getting the expression of parents' love can make children face life positively when they are unhappy, such as disappointment and depression, and find ways to deal with and get rid of temporary difficulties.
But surprisingly, many children simply don't know how much their parents love and care about him, precisely because their parents didn't convey this message to them. Indeed, for traditional China parents, let him say such things? You are the most important thing in my life? This is a bit difficult, but it is very important for children. Why don't you try?
point out
1, let the child know that you love him every morning before going to bed at night, and do it as an important thing;
2. Let the children see the love between you and your lover;
Don't be lazy when children participate in activities, which will make them feel that they are not important in your heart.
Related case studies: First, don't let excessive praise numb children.
Mingming likes painting very much. But once when he exhibited his works, he pouted and said, no matter what I draw, the teacher will say it's really good. Xiao Hai (a child in the class) doodles colors, and the teacher will praise her and give her the same prize as me. Really boring! ?
Wei Wei was also exaggerated by her parents since she was a child. When she smiles occasionally, everyone appreciates her. What a beautiful smile this baby has! ? She babbles, and everyone praises her: How clever the baby is! ? Even when you lose your temper, don't forget to appreciate it: Vivian has a real personality! ? However, as she grew up, her parents and teachers gradually discovered a serious problem: Vivian only wanted to listen to good words, not any criticism, and could not stand a little setback.
In the class I have taken, many children are prone to self-righteousness in blind praise and affirmation, and even appear depressed, angry, shrinking or hostile behavior, while parents are unaware of it.
Expert comments:
Excessive appreciation and unnecessary praise cannot effectively express your love for your children. To a certain extent, it will make children rely too much on external evaluation and not really invest in the matter itself. Over time, it will also weaken their sense of responsibility and self-motivation and lack the motivation to do things.
Second:? "Encourage seedlings"? Can our children be happy?
It is important for children who are about to enter primary school to develop good study habits, but many parents attach too much importance to knowledge and skills. ? Teacher, did you learn the decomposition of 7 today? Why are there only two kinds of children coming back? My friend's child learned the decomposition of 13. Is she too stupid? What if primary school can't keep up? Today, I taught her to know clocks. I have taught her many times, but she doesn't know them. I also made a video. Why do you think her performance is like this? ! ? In the video, the child is crying hard on the table. Reminiscent of normal times, the little girl flinched at the first little difficulty in class: teacher, this is too difficult. I don't want to be involved. ? I finally understand, living in such an urgent, anxious and negative environment, can children be confident?
Expert comments:
Being ahead is not necessarily the best, nor should it be the yardstick for children to grow up sooner or later. No matter how urgent parents are, don't let each other's comparison and blindly follow the trend blind their hearts, otherwise they will eventually hurt their children's hearts. Giving children enough time and space, smiling and waiting for him to bloom, is the best love for children!