2. Boys and girls should be treated equally: Although parents think that the education of girls and boys is equally important, they prefer to talk about sex with girls. The survey results also show that compared with girls, fathers or mothers rarely talk about sex with boys, and most of the sexual knowledge they know is obtained from books, magazines and peers. Adolescent children are eager to learn sexual knowledge and understand what will happen to their bodies during adolescence. At this point, boys and girls are the same. Although the physical changes of boys and girls in adolescence have their own characteristics, on the whole, their growth experiences and new feelings become sensitive, and their situations are very similar. Therefore, as parents, both boys and girls should talk about sex with their children as frankly as possible.
3. How to talk about sex with children: Why do many parents find it difficult to talk about sex with their children? This is because many parents feel that their knowledge is limited. Some parents think that the less their children know about sexual problems, the better. They are worried that talking about these problems will lead their children to try sex too early. And many of our parents haven't talked about sex with their parents and don't know how to tell their children. Therefore, as parents, we should learn some knowledge about sex to enrich ourselves and learn some knowledge related to sex education. With sufficient knowledge preparation, you will have confidence when talking to your child about sex. Parents' self-confidence is the key to implementing sex education easily and effectively. How to talk about sex with children, the following views can be used for parents' reference.
(1) Teach children the correct names of various parts of the body, such as penis and vulva. This will help you communicate with your child more accurately and conveniently. The correct names of body parts will also help you explain to your child what sexual assault is. Children can also tell you clearly whether there has been sexual assault.
(2) Don't wait to ask questions. Sometimes parents feel that their children never ask questions. In fact, sometimes you don't have to wait for your child to ask questions before you start talking. Parents can use the events around them or in society to discuss with their children. Explain to your child what you think about some problems, the preventive measures you should take to avoid some problems, and the solutions you should take after the incident.
(3) When you don't know, admit that it sometimes doesn't know how to answer the questions raised by children, or doesn't know at all. It doesn't matter. Admit to your child that you don't know. A good way is to check the information with your child and find the answer. Through this matter, we can also set an example for children to be honest and solve problems.
What you do is as important as what you say. Parents should pay attention to the nonverbal information their children get from adults. For example, mutual respect, loyalty, sharing housework, respecting the old and loving the young, helping others, being polite, being serious and responsible for work, being honest and trustworthy, etc. Will be passed on to their children through their parents' behavior.
(5) Respect your children The following are three important factors that will affect how your children deal with the sexual problems of teenagers and future adults. These three factors are: self-esteem, privacy and how to make a decision. Helping children build self-esteem is a positive self-concept and a kind of respect and love for themselves. Good self-esteem is a very important part of mental health. Praise and support can promote children's self-esteem, while blind criticism is not conducive to children's self-esteem. Parents seem to have a natural ability to help their children build self-esteem. You see, parents gave their children great encouragement when they first tried to talk or learn to walk. Children's self-confidence and self-esteem need parents' encouragement, which lasts until adolescence. Studies abroad show that teenagers who have strong self-esteem and feel good about themselves and think they deserve respect are less likely to have sexual problems than other teenagers. Teenagers with high self-esteem start having sex later, and don't start until they are more mature. Therefore, we should pay attention to cultivating children's healthy self-esteem, which is also an important part of making him mature. Children should be instilled with the concept of respecting their privacy from the beginning of sex education. When a toddler is told that something belongs to someone else, he will have some initial concepts of rejection. Tell children that genitalia is a private part of people. Without our own permission, others have no right to see or touch this part. Tell children not to touch other people's genitals. When telling children that adults need privacy, it is very important to give them privacy. This means respecting children's privacy wishes as soon as possible and fully respecting their privacy when they grow up. In other words, when children go to school, don't search their rooms, don't peek at their diaries and letters, and don't spy on them behind their backs. Allow children to have their own ideas and practices. When discussing some problems with children, we should be careful not to comment too much, so that children can feel that their parents are willing to listen to their own ideas and can have an equal dialogue with their parents. This way, the child is willing to tell you anything. Parents can also clearly tell their children their own values and the criteria for judging right and wrong. Helping children learn how to make decisions and cultivating their ability to make decisions and judge themselves are also very important contents of sex education. Most decisions about sex made by our children are made in private, that is, they are made without our presence and guidance. As children get older, the situations they encounter and the decisions they make will become more complicated. Parents should teach their children decision-making skills, tell them information, values, self-confidence, how to get the best results, and give them the opportunity to practice decision-making skills as soon as possible. In the process of learning to make decisions, increase your sense of responsibility. It is also important to support children to make decisions and respect their choices. Before or after puberty, most children will face sexual situations and have to make a decision. He may need to know what a safe date or social activity is and what kind of situation is potentially dangerous to sexual assault. How to make better decisions in some situations depends in part on the skills and confidence they have developed in their early childhood. ?
4. When talking about sexual problems with children, we should pay attention to the appropriate principles: children's ability to think and understand problems increases with age. Therefore, children's sexual problems and their understanding of the answers will change with age. For example, a toddler may begin to notice that not all adults and children are the same. Children of this age can only understand the simplest answers of sexual organs. For example, a 2-year-old boy wants to know why he has a penis and his neighbor's little sister doesn't. He doesn't want to know the detailed description of men and women and how humans make love. You tell him that he doesn't understand. He is interested in finding two kinds of children, a little girl and a little boy, who will grow up to be women and men respectively like their mothers or fathers. Understanding the characteristics of children's psychological development is helpful for parents to carry out sex education suitable for children according to their age characteristics. It is helpful to know the child's understanding of this question before answering. With the growth of children's age, the understanding of some issues is further deepened, and the questions raised are more complicated, such as how pregnancy occurs, which is much more complicated than before. The so-called "appropriateness" means choosing appropriate educational content and methods according to the age characteristics and physical and mental development level of children; And at the appropriate time, teach the selected content to children; In the process of education, we should have a rigorous scientific attitude and speak to children in a targeted and measured way. For example, the knowledge about women's menstrual health is told to children too early, children don't understand it well, and it is told too late. When menstruation comes, the child is psychologically unprepared, resulting in unnecessary tension and panic. The best time to explain these contents is when the child is about to menarche. The content of sex education is very extensive. Every child not only has different age and speed of puberty development, but also has different problems in daily life. Therefore, parents should choose appropriate content, appropriate time and appropriate methods according to the specific situation to achieve the purpose of education.
I hope my answer is useful to you. Thank you for your adoption.