(A) to cultivate children's excellent quality in the first place.
For children aged 4-6, we believe that the education of ideological quality should be put in the first place, and the development of ideological and moral character will drive the development of other aspects. Cultivating children's ideological and moral character is mainly the education and cultivation of politeness, love and self-discipline.
1. Cultivation of politeness
We educate our children to behave in a civilized manner and be polite to others, so that they can understand from an early age what social morality is, how to abide by it, what civilized behavior is, what uncivilized behavior is, and how to abide by discipline and public order.
To cultivate children's civility, courtesy and order, we should start from two aspects, one is to clarify the rules, the other is to cultivate restraint.
The so-called rules, from laws and regulations, social ethics and codes of conduct, to rules of the game and family rules, are all-encompassing. Of course, for children aged 4 ~ 6, we should start education from the superficial to the deep, such as observing traffic order, which is legal education; Don't damage public property, don't rummage through other people's things, love and protect animals and plants, which is social morality education; Being ready to help others and thanking others for their help are the education of the code of conduct. These educations run through the process of children's growth, which may happen and be carried out at any time.
The so-called restraint is based on the characteristics that children are still young and have weak ability to control their own behavior. When the individual's will to act conflicts with law and morality, children are taught to control their own behavior. For example: the family has to eat, and the children have to watch TV; It's time to leave someone else's house, but the child still refuses to go; Parents cry and lie when they don't buy what they want in the mall, and so on. You must not accommodate your child at this time. They should be persuaded in time, supplemented by coercive means when necessary, and gradually cultivate their restraint ability.
We should attach importance to small things, and we can't indulge our children just because we neglect the education of children, because the truth is the same whether things are "big" or "small" in etiquette, and many "big things" are accumulated by "small things". Some bad habits of children have not been corrected after the first time, and they have already formed habits the second time and the third time. Don't think that children are too young to be sensible and naturally grow up. You can't be quick and quick. We should use shallow "causal education" to cultivate children's civility and politeness, so that children can think that as long as their actions have no consequences, or they can escape punishment, they can violate the regulations and disobey order and public morality at will. For example: throw the peel in the box, or you will be fined if you are caught; So, if you don't get caught, can you throw things around?
Besides setting an example, it is also important to cultivate children's manners. The civilization of parents and family members has a great influence on children. In particular, children have strong imitation ability, and adults are his role models. Because children are young and their thinking is not perfect, some truths should be understood and perfected slowly. At this time, the behavior of adults, especially parents, is often the norm of his behavior. This shows that it is very important for parents to set an example. We pay attention to creating a warm and harmonious family, where husband and wife love each other, respect the elderly, live in harmony with their neighbors, behave in a civilized manner, abide by public morality and be polite to others, so that children can feel the civilized atmosphere of the family and grow up in a harmonious and happy environment.
2. The cultivation of love
what is love ? Love is giving and giving. We let children know what love is from an early age, understand others' love for themselves, and can't forget others' care and help for their growth, so that they can realize that these care and help are "love". On the one hand, let children deeply feel the love given by others, and let children always be grateful for this kind of care. Don't be insensitive and take it for granted. On the other hand, we should also educate children to know and learn to love others, so that children can have love and compassion. The cultivation of love and compassion should also start from small things. For example, when I was a child, other children fell and cried, so I calmed them down. When I fell, I hit the corner of the table. At this time, while touching the child's sore spot, we said, "You touched the table, and you are in great pain. Mom touched it for you, but the table also hurts. Please help the table touch! " Sometimes, the elderly at home fall asleep watching TV at home during the day, so let the children turn off the TV and close the door, talk softly at home and walk gently. The old man squatted on the ground to pick vegetables and asked them to hand over their stools. Let them experience how to take care of the elderly. If you do these things a few times more and accumulate more, you will develop the habit of caring for others. When you get along with others, you will consider their feelings more. We believe that if a child doesn't even know how to love his parents who have worked so hard to raise him, and has no love for others, can he still love his motherland when he grows up?
We should repeatedly tell our children to learn to take care of themselves and take good care of themselves. On the one hand, it is to improve their self-care ability, on the other hand, it is also to reduce the burden on their parents, which is also a manifestation of their love. Especially in many of our families, children mainly rely on the elderly, who are old and in poor health. If children don't know how to take care of themselves and understand the hardships of others, it will not only affect their own growth, but also hinder the elderly from enjoying their old age happily and even affect their health and longevity.
3. Self-restraint training
Self-discipline is the embodiment of people's ideological quality, moral cultivation and willpower. A newborn baby has almost no self-control. He cries when he is hungry and urinates when he urinates. For children aged 4 ~ 6, we should start to guide them to control their desires and gradually increase their control ability. When they reach school age, they will know the rules and have the ability of self-discipline.
Sometimes we will see some children crying in public, even lying on the ground, because they want to buy toys and snacks, and their parents cry when they don't meet the requirements. Parents are helpless in the face of their children's crying, and they can't fight and coax. In our opinion, the reason why children cry like this is because we can't just blame them. There must be something wrong with parents' education methods, because some of the children's demands were achieved by crying in the past. Usually, parents are used to coax their children, but they do not let them control their desires and have self-control ability through effective education.
To cultivate children's self-control ability, we also need to start from an early age and start from small things.
Let children learn to share with others from an early age. When a child has something delicious and a beloved toy, let him share it with others.
Controlling desire is a kind of self-discipline ability. If children want to control their desires, they should not make excessive demands on their parents. Everyone has desires, and the key is to control them. Children usually have two kinds of desires. One is material, which requires parents to buy food, clothes and play. The other is spiritual. I hope parents can accompany them, tell them stories and play with them. We believe that the desire for children, as long as it is reasonable and achievable, should be promised to the children, and promised to do it in the future, and can not violate the promise to the children. (I once participated in the story of killing pigs) However, I must explain the truth to my children about unreasonable or unsatisfied demands from my family. Then, I must flatly refuse to give them hope. Parents should not let their children forget temporarily by diverting their attention, and then bring up the old things again; Children are not allowed to achieve their goals through the channels of other family members, or even by using the contradictions between family members.
For example, parents are busy and children pester adults to play together. At this time, parents should explain the truth and tell their children: "Mom and Dad have something to do. I will play with you later. You play first." But be careful, you must take time to play with your children in the future, and don't break your word. For example, if you take your child to the street and the child sees a toy that he really wants, but this toy is obviously not suitable for children of his age to play with, or there is already a similar toy at home, there is no need to buy it again. At this time, you should categorically reject the child's request and clearly tell him the reasons for not buying. Never lie to your child and say, "There is no money to buy at home." Or: "Mom and Dad have no money, so they can't buy it." In this way, children may try to possess it in other ways. Not to mention that children can satisfy their wishes without spending a few dollars anyway. This obedience to children is more harmful to children.
Let children do anything, and consider the impact on others. In the family, the way to treat young children and babies is very different. For the baby, the whole family should take him as the center, because he is hungry, he should be fed; If he is sleepy, he should be put to sleep. The family should take him as the center and ensure his needs. For young children, families cannot always be child-centered. Let children gradually realize that he is only a member of the family, there is no reason to put him in the most important position, and it is impossible to give him priority in everything. Let him know that the affairs of adults are more important than his affairs, and his activities cannot affect the work of adults. Never cultivate children's sense of superiority in the family. We ask children to behave themselves and not to hinder or influence others. Don't make noise when adults have something to do, and try not to interfere with their work.
(B) seize the opportunity to do a good job in children's intellectual development.
According to scientists' research, a person's intelligence has developed to 60% ~ 70% before primary school, and then to 30% ~ 40% after 6 years old. In preschool children, 3 to 4 years old is the accelerated period of brain wave development and an important period of developing computing ability; 5 to 6 years old is the accelerated period of the development of logical thinking ability. Grasping the accelerated period of intellectual development and giving correct and timely education can effectively develop children's intelligence and improve IQ.
Huang Dawei, a young college student, started primary school at the age of two and a half. At the age of 3, I enrolled in primary school Chinese study, and the six-year primary school curriculum took only three years to finish. At the age of five and a half, David began to go to middle school. Three years later, when he was eight and a half years old, he had completely mastered the high school curriculum.
What should be taught in early development for children of this age? Some parents think that early development is "advanced education", and we don't think it is appropriate to bring what we learned in primary school to preschool schools. In the successful examples of early development, we can feel that the knowledge learned by preschool children seems to be similar to that learned by primary schools, but the methods of learning by preschool children and teaching primary school students are very different, and the composition of knowledge is also different.
The purpose of primary school learning is to let students learn and master knowledge systematically, and the success of education is usually tested by learning effect. However, preschool children's learning is in "play" middle school, which does not pay attention to the systematization of knowledge, but inspires intelligence through the learning process. So the learning process is more important than the learning effect. In other words, it doesn't care about what children learn, but about how children learn and how to teach them how to learn.
When reading becomes meaningful, children will be willing to take the initiative to get close to books.
3. The plot of the story has obvious time sequence.
Five-year-old children began to have a correct concept of time, know the relative relationship between present, past and future, and also know the concepts of day, night and four seasons, and began to use compound time words such as this morning and tomorrow afternoon in their language. This feature also enables them to understand the complicated story progress when reading. Therefore, when parents choose books for their children, they can especially choose books with more specific chronological descriptions in the story.
4. Picture books about interpersonal relationships
The child went to kindergarten. In group life, he began to understand what a friend is. He likes to play with friends of similar age, take care of each other and need emotional support. However, sometimes parents will hear children talk about conflicts with certain children in the park, because children are still in the self-centered period and the necessary concepts of "sharing" and "taking turns" in collective life have not been established. Therefore, theme story books closely related to children's reading and life, such as Friendship and School Life, can not only arouse children's reading interest, but also discuss these issues with children through reading.
5. Fairy tales with a clear distinction between good and evil
In addition to interpersonal communication, another focus of group life is the cultivation of routines. Kindergarten children are still at the first level of the development of psychologist Kohlberg's moral judgment, that is, obeying authority and rules to avoid being punished. Therefore, children like to read stories with clear cause and effect between good and evil-happy endings in which the bad guys are punished and the good guys are rewarded. Parents can choose some picture books adapted from classic fairy tales, tell them to their children and discuss their views on each role with them.
For example, the training of computing ability. When we teach our children to calculate, we don't simply use the arithmetic problems in the first and second grades of primary school, nor do we make learning plans and goals. Instead, let children master the skills of calculation, understand some basic laws and inspire their thinking in daily life. Take counting as an example. Generally, children of this age can count to dozens or hundreds. However, we teach children to count, in addition to counting in the normal order, but also let them jump, count backwards and jump backwards. At first, I jumped in one place, and then I jumped in several places, from which I learned addition and subtraction and exercised my fast computing ability. We also teach them the rounding rules of numbers and encourage them to learn the sorting of numbers by themselves. We often play digital games with children, such as digital solitaire and wonderful numbers. Give play to teaching. Regular exercise has formed a strong stimulus to children's brains, which makes children have a strong interest in numbers since childhood.
Such as memory training. People's memory intensity is different, because there are both congenital and acquired reasons, but congenital factors only affect mechanical memory. It is necessary to guide children to develop logical thinking and memory ability as soon as possible, teach him logical methods and accumulate knowledge. Some parents let their children recite Tang and Song poems and children's songs. We don't think it is very helpful to cultivate their memory ability, because children can recite, but they don't understand. It is very likely that he memorized today and forgot tomorrow, or memorized the new one and forgot the old one. We don't approve of children's rote memorization to cultivate their memory ability. The key is to let children master memory methods, know the tricks of memory, improve their memory ability and enhance their interest in memory through correct methods. In other words, what we care about is not what children remember, but how they remember, and improve their memory ability through the training of memory methods.
Another example is the training of thinking ability. The training range of thinking ability is very wide, such as image thinking ability, logical thinking ability and so on. We believe that the training of children's thinking ability is mainly to use the problems encountered in life, to exert their imagination, to cultivate inductive reasoning ability and to use their brains flexibly, spiritually and intelligently. We attach great importance to playing intellectual games with children and encourage them to use their brains. When our children were five or six years old, we began to train them to play chess, first playing checkers and gobang, and then playing China chess. We also learned chess and Go for a while in primary school. We think playing chess is especially beneficial to improve children's thinking ability. Lenin, the great revolutionary teacher, called chess "gymnastics of wisdom", and he himself loved playing chess.
Therefore, for children aged 4 ~ 6, it is the most critical period of intellectual enlightenment. If they ignore the intellectual development in this period, they may not achieve much even if they work hard in the future. Some parents think that children can worry about going to kindergarten, because children before the age of 3 are weak in self-care ability, and it is difficult for parents to take good care of their children. Now they can go to kindergarten, and they can go to primary school in a few years. Parents can relax when there is a kindergarten to take care of their children. They believe that education begins when children go to primary school. However, if we neglect the education and training of children during this period and miss the golden time of education, it will be a great pity and even an irreparable loss.
(3) Pay attention to the cultivation of children's self-care ability.
The cultivation of children's self-care ability is as important as children's intellectual development and moral education, which complement each other. Generally speaking, children with strong self-care ability have better ideological and moral quality and stronger learning ability. Some parents think that their children are still young and underestimate their abilities. Originally, some things in life can be done by children themselves, and parents often arrange for their children to do them, instead of letting them do them themselves, and pay attention to training. Especially in one-child families, the problem of doting on children in life is more prominent. Many parents pay more attention to the early development of their children's intelligence, but ignore the cultivation of their self-care ability, and some children with top learning and low life have emerged.