Then, as "surrogate parents", how can left-behind children learn to be kind to criticism and make continuous progress? We might as well take the following measures:
(1) Teach children not to make a fuss about other people's criticism. Educating children, of course, we must insist on praise, but we might as well consciously let children hear both positive affirmation and negative criticism when they are teething or toddler. Of course, we should pay attention to the criticism of young children, and we must be gentle and to the point, based on more praise. For example, when the child's theory of "drinking water" is clear, but the theory of "eating" is not clear, the mother can say, "You didn't say it clearly enough, can you say it again?" Early conscious "introduction" of criticism can help children subconsciously realize that criticism and praise are equally common! In fact, children who can adapt to criticism in early childhood are often more adaptable to society when they grow up, including having a peaceful mind to treat criticism and even criticism from others correctly and cultivating a strong ability to withstand setbacks.
(2) Let children learn to listen carefully. No matter how sharp and unpleasant the criticism is, parents should ask their children to listen carefully. Because only by listening carefully will you find that there may be some truth in it, and finally you can accept it with an open mind. Let children gradually understand and listen carefully to other people's criticism, which is not only a manifestation of civilization, but also a necessary way to improve themselves.
(3) Cold treatment but don't be silent. Dealing with it calmly does not mean keeping silent about criticism. Parents should educate their children to accept the reasonable components of criticism with an open mind, and even list the improvement methods or measures. Of course, thanking critics can better reflect the sincerity of accepting criticism. The "cold handling" skills that children are required to master include: don't talk back to critics, don't "fight back in self-defense", and don't exaggerate. Children should be required to calmly analyze as many reasonable elements as possible in critical discourse on the basis of listening carefully.
(4) interpretation is allowed. When criticism does not conform to the facts, children should also be allowed to explain, because letting children wrongly express their acceptance of criticism will make them feel great grievances, which in fact will not only help, but may also lead to various drawbacks. At the same time, let children understand that the purpose of explanation is not to shirk responsibility, but to ask children to keep a calm and realistic attitude when explaining.
(5) Treat critics equally. Many children can listen carefully and accept criticism from teachers or parents with an open mind, but refuse criticism from their peers. At this time, we should educate our children: as long as the criticism is reasonable, even if it comes from a small partner, we should accept it with humility.
In fact, as long as children learn to be "kind" to criticism, then criticism can become a driving force to encourage children to move forward, just like praise, and it will also play a warning role that praise is difficult to play.