Family education is not equal to family study.
In real life, some parents who want their children to succeed are always worried that their children will lose at the starting line, forcing young children to participate in various classes, which greatly limits their independent leisure; Some parents worry that the school's burden reduction will affect their children's scores in the senior high school entrance examination and will increase their burden. The family has become the second classroom to fill the gap for the school. Under the heavy pressure of study, children's bad living habits began to form and threatened their health unconsciously.
Guan Ying, secretary-general of Tianjin Family Education Research Association, said that the reason is that some parents interpret family education as family study, while educating children mainly focuses on children's study. Children's learning has become the central content of interaction between parents and children. Parents regard their roles as crutches for children's study and teaching assistants for school teachers, while the most basic responsibilities of parents, such as caring for children's health and educating people, are largely ignored. This is the dislocation of parents' roles.
Guan Ying said that the newly revised Law on the Protection of Minors stipulates that parents should cooperate with schools to ensure the sleep, entertainment and physical exercise time of underage students, and should not increase their study burden. In fact, the result of the dislocation of parents' roles is that although they have paid a lot for their children, because they don't understand the teaching rules, teaching contents and methods, they are often too focused, unable to get to the point, and feel more and more powerless. This has become the so-called self-improvement.
Parents' abuse can easily catalyze children's bad psychology and behavior.
According to a survey conducted by Tianjin Family Education Research Association, 26.4% parents agree that it is good for their children to beat them when they are at fault, 46.4% parents disagree, but there are some elements of agreement, and only 27.2% clearly disagree. The Survey of Personal Injury among Primary and Secondary School Students in China shows that 3.6% of children are often beaten at home, and as many as 57.3% are occasionally beaten.
Guan Ying analyzed that many parents beat and scold their children in the face of their unsatisfactory words and deeds, perhaps subjectively for the sake of their children, but objectively, they bring their children not only physical pain, but also psychological trauma and behavioral distortion. A survey of juvenile offenders shows that children who are often beaten and scolded at home have the most obvious personality characteristics such as indifference, irritability and inferiority. The proportion of bad behaviors such as staying out at night, fighting, petty theft and forcibly asking others for property is higher than that of children who are not often beaten and scolded.
Guan Ying pointed out that the newly revised Law on the Protection of Minors prohibits domestic violence against minors, which is based on the standpoint of protecting the personal rights and personal dignity of minors, denying the concept that you can't be a dutiful son without beating a stick, and also restricting parents from arbitrarily hurting their children by relying on adults' personal and economic dependence. (Zhou Runjian)