Although I've been busy with my work recently, I still took time to watch the fourth and fifth issues of Senior One. In the program, with the gradual deepening of primary school life, children encounter more and more problems in the program, such as the fight between Xixi (children in the article all use nicknames) and Mark in the fourth period, and the study and examination problems faced by children in the fifth period. These are all problems that every parent will encounter in real life, and it is also a time to test their educational wisdom. Through the analysis of these problems in the program, I put forward the following suggestions to my parents:

First of all, a good education needs the combination of Chinese and Western.

In the program, Xixi's family is a transnational combination of British father and Chinese mother. They sometimes have diametrically opposite attitudes in the way of educating their children. For example, in dealing with the conflict between Xixi and Mark, dad thinks it is a fight between children, so don't go online, while mom thinks that children's behavior must be strictly disciplined, otherwise it will easily become a moral problem; In writing homework, Xixi's father thinks that children just go to school, so they don't need to be methodical in writing homework, and don't restrain their thinking prematurely, while Xixi's mother thinks that writing homework should be uniform, which is conducive to cultivating children's awareness of rules; During a rare ball game in Changsha, Xixi and his son asked the teacher for leave to watch the ball game together. He believes that this experience is also an education, while his mother thinks that it is unprofessional to let children take time off to watch the ball game, which will affect their study. Both people's views on education seem to make sense, so after reading the fourth phase of senior one, some parents asked me their confusion through WeChat: which education method is better in China and the West?

Professor Lin Chongde, a famous psychologist and Beijing Normal University, has specially studied the differences between Chinese and western educational models. He pointed out that China's educational model attaches importance to cultivating students' profound knowledge, logical thinking, unified norms and collectivism, so children in China have strong logical thinking. In the annual international Olympic competition for middle school students, children in China often win the first place in mathematics, science, chemistry and computer. Western education pays more attention to students' practical activities. From primary and secondary schools to graduate students, the school has hands-on classes. Their education opposes "theory on paper" and pays attention to guiding innovative thinking and solving practical problems.

Through research, Professor Lin Chongde put forward the idea of "integrating eastern and western educational models to cultivate' T' type talents", that is, integrating the advantages of Chinese and western educational models, paying attention to children's basic knowledge learning, meeting their actual needs, and protecting their curiosity and innovative thinking. For example, Xixi's mother's strict attitude towards his study in the program is right, but it needs to be combined with Dad's more creative educational methods, such as teaching children English by playing Harry Potter, which will make them feel very novel.

Second, family education needs a balance between freedom and self-control.

Huichang Chen, a professor of psychology at Beijing Normal University, conducted a follow-up study of more than 200 children in Beijing for 19 years, and finally found two psychological characteristics in the process of children's growth, which he called "two seeds": initiative and self-control.

According to the strength of "two seeds", he divided children into four types: the first type is children with strong two seeds, such as the little apple in the program, who are very active in learning and class activities, and have strong discipline and self-control; The second kind is children with strong initiative and weak self-control, such as Haotuo and Xixi. Haotuo can speak actively in class and dare to express himself, which is a manifestation of initiative, but he can't sit still in class and cry when he meets something, which is a manifestation of poor self-control. The same is true of Xixi, who can actively express and dare to speak, but has low self-control, poor sense of rules, and even lost the position of monitor. The third kind of children with poor initiative but strong self-control, such as Xiao Nuan, are emotionally stable in learning and doing things, and have strong self-control and execution, but they are often unwilling to communicate with others on their own initiative and shrink back in the face of competition. The fourth kind is children whose initiative and self-control need to be improved. Mark may belong to this type. Although he is also self-motivated and competitive, he is not confident enough and lacks a positive attitude when facing difficulties and challenges. In the sense of emotion and rules, he is more likely to lose control than Hao Tuo. Of course, the performance of children's self-control and initiative in the program is also related to the characteristics of their growth stage. For example, because of gender differences, girls generally perform better than boys.

There is no doubt that family education should be to cultivate children with good development of both seeds and strong initiative and self-control. So what should we do? I think the key to balanced education is that parents should adopt democratic and authoritative education methods. For example, to cultivate children's initiative, we need to respect and understand their characteristics and give them a democratic and relaxed atmosphere; Cultivating children's self-control requires parents to dare to say no to their children's bad behavior, correctly punish their children's wrong behavior, and let them bear the consequences they can bear, thus cultivating their sense of rules and responsibility.

Third, educate children not to use threats excessively.

In the program, when Xixi's mother saw her son deliberately lifting the book that Mark was absorbed in reading to make trouble through the surveillance video, she couldn't accept it for a while, told her son to go away in the school corridor and threatened not to want him again. When children make mistakes, parents' disappointment is understandable, but it also needs to be handled in a calm and rational way.

Psychologists such as McCord have systematically studied children's aggressive behavior and parental rearing patterns for five years. They found that when parents mainly adopt education methods such as refusal, threats and corporal punishment, children's aggressive behavior will increase greatly during their growth. In the program, Xixi's parents adopted a threatening education method for him. For example, after seeing the video of him hitting people, his mother threatened not to want him, and his father also threatened him. If he plays with Mark again, he will be in trouble, which parents should avoid when educating their children.

Fourth, it is more important for primary school students to love learning than to learn well.

In the fifth stage of the program, the children ushered in the first exam in their lives-the oral Chinese exam. For many children, exams may be a headache, especially for boys with slow language development. It is not easy for them to remember pinyin, so Mark, Hao Tuo and Xixi in the program face seemingly simple pinyin.

In the program, parents' attitudes and methods in helping their children cope with exams are worth learning from, while others need to be avoided. For example, it is debatable that Mark's father and Xixi's mother guide their children to practice pinyin. In the process of teaching his son pinyin, he takes a high-handed attitude and lacks the necessary patience. Especially when the child has not made progress, he can't help but knock his head with a lead. Xixi's mother also threatened to punish him for writing and force him to study hard. As a result, the child cried and learned.

The parents in the program also revealed an educational problem in real life: parents' anxiety about their children's academic performance caused their children's childhood panic. Many parents are often more nervous than their children in the face of exams. Nearly half of the consultation questions received by parents on WeChat are related to their children's learning.

In fact, for primary school students, loving learning is more important than learning well. The key of primary school students is to cultivate good study interest and study habits. When children are faced with excessive learning pressure and lack of happy experience, it is difficult to be interested in learning, and it is easier to get tired of learning. In this regard, the method adopted by Princess Purple's father is very good. By imitating the dialogue between Big Wolf and Pleasant Goat, he asked his daughter to practice pinyin. Haotuo's mother did well, too. When checking the children's homework, she first praised the children's good work, and then pointed out the children's shortcomings, thus avoiding the situation of excessively hitting the children's enthusiasm.

Parents should respect their children's characteristics when guiding their students to learn. For example, children in Grade One in senior high school still focus on logical thinking in images, and it is not easy to understand and remember abstract numbers and pinyin. Parents need to show it in a more vivid way, or help their children remember what they are familiar with, instead of putting too much pressure on their children by forced irrigation.

For children, it is far more important to give them colorful life experiences than to immerse them in boring studies. However, in the preview of the sixth program, parents and teachers prepared a unique study tour for their children. What kind of experience will children have next? I also look forward to their wonderful performance.