This sentence comes from Mr. Mu Xin, a contemporary writer and painter in China. This is a monologue he left in a small building in his later years.
So, do you know Mr Mu Xin?
Mu Xin created many works, including essays and essays. And poems such as Three Trees in Spain and Baron. Novels include Diary of Windsor Cemetery. His paintings include Mu Xin Ji Hua, etc. And oral works such as Memoirs of Literature.
1982 lives in new york, engaged in art and literary creation. His literary works often appear in the literary supplement of Qiao Bao.
1994, Mu Xin returned to his hometown of wuzhen. Mu Xin, who was disappointed and sad, wrote Wuzhen because his ancestral home was not what it was then. In his book, he described it as follows: "In the concept of habit,' hometown' is' the most familiar place', but at present I only know the place name, but I know nothing about dialects and others. ...
Later, this article was published in China Times from Taiwan Province Province 1998 to 65438+February. 1999, Chen Xianghong, a design expert in Wuzhen Scenic Area, saw this article and decided to invite Mu Xin back to his hometown.
Want to know more about Mr. Mu Xin's life details and research results, in the book "I am for me, only in a different place: all views on Mu Xin" (hereinafter referred to as "all views on Mu Xin"), there are six series for us to elaborate.
This book is written by two authors. One is Xia Chunjin, a young scholar and reading promoter. A special researcher at the Sino-American Mu Xin Research Center of Hangzhou Normal University, he was selected into the talent pool of "Sino-Dutch Project" in Zhejiang Province. He is the author of Textual Research on Mu Xin, Robinson in Literature: The First Half of Mu Xin, and Chronicle of Mr. Mu Xin, etc. The other is Tang Fang, a reader from Mu Xin, a teacher from Tongxiang Zhendong Middle School.
The content of this book is mainly based on the recollection and explanation of Mu Xin's past life, and gives a comprehensive comment on Mu Xin, including the academic comments on his specific works, the analysis of his paintings and music works, and an overview of Mu Xin Memorial Hall and Art Gallery.
The contents of this book were not included in the previous Mu Xin commemorative special issue.
For readers, Mu Xin has high hopes, but he also respects himself, equal to himself and higher than himself. He even regards readers as the ideal he pursues in his heart.
For example, Mu Xin once said, "The reader is a powerful and elegant concept in my mind. This concept is almost all my aesthetics. You are my reader, that's not bad. "
People's attention to Mu Xin originated from painting and then focused on literature.
However, the article "Seeing the Natural Landscape of Mu Xin" written by Chen Yingde and his wife gave Mu Xin great care and encouragement.
Therefore, Mu Xin regarded this incident as his "top priority in the history of art" and wrote in his thank-you letter: "If I am finally known, it will start with two prophets."
Another early reader was attracted by Mu Xin. His name is Tong Ming and he teaches at California State University. Through the introduction of Xiang by novelist Guo Songshu, we have known each other for more than 20 years.
From readers to Mu Xin's best friends, they have been together for a long time to discuss literary topics in depth.
It can be said that Tong Ming's knowledge background and creative style of Mu Xin can be described as "knowing the root", which is why he can always accurately extract the literary texture of Mu Xin.
Therefore, when he prefaced Mu Xin's book "Leopard Change", he was able to cross the cultural context and capture the essence of Mu Xin's creation, which made people read it as "fresh and pleasant as the morning breeze recalls memories".
Like Tong Ming, Mu Xin has a keen literary sense, and there are a number of domestic readers, including Chen Zishan, Sun Yu, Jing Li, Sun Meng, Xia Lie, Hu Yun and Zhao Kun. ...
Chen Zishan, for example, has made great achievements in modern literature and overseas literature. As early as 200 1, Mu Xin's "Shanghai Fu" was serialized in Shanghai literary world by stages because of his unique views.
Let Mu Xin return to the vision of mainland readers with a decent attitude; This vision is also reflected in his new work Zhang Ailing in Mu Xin's Works.
There is also a reader, Professor Sun Yu of Renmin University, who is a knowledgeable writer and scholar. This book just includes his article "Wood Heart between Beijing and the Sea", which provides us with a different perspective to understand wood heart. Professor Sun Yu not only lamented the "otherness" of Muxin, but also reminded people to really understand it.
In fact, these readers, like you and me, have gone from ignorance to real understanding of Muxin. However, they found the answer from research and demonstration in front of us.
Therefore, it is true and commendable that Mu Xin is to readers and readers are to Mu Xin.
Mu Xin once said, "An artist is a chooser first ...". It can be said that this sentence is a true portrayal of Mu Xin on the road of art.
In Mu Xin's tortuous art and life, he faced repeated choices; Every time I come to a fork in the road in my life, it is actually a turning point in Mu Xin's fate.
There are many difficulties. Every time he makes a choice, Mu Xin sticks to his original heart by virtue of his education worthy of art.
So, what kind of life choices did Mu Xin experience?
1943, Mu Xin 17 years old. He left Wuzhen and went to Hangzhou to be an "artist who knows easier than he does".
In his later years, Mu Xin recalled himself when he was young. Why did he run away from home? The reason for this is the following：
One is "forced marriage" at home. He wants to escape by imitating art with life.
Second, the problem of choosing a job. His family wanted him to study law or be a doctor, but he only liked painting and literature. He wanted to apply for the National Hangzhou Art College, but his family opposed him.
Nevertheless, Mu Xin did not give in to fate. He made the most important choice in his life.
Because of her persistence in art and her "self-help" in reading when she was young, a lot of reading opened Mu Xin's eyes.
Therefore, Mu Xin said, "My hometown is as quiet as an ancient temple in the mountains. The book tells me that the world is full of miracles, and the rich life experience is what I yearn for. I know that if I don't leave home again, my life will definitely rest. "
Therefore, Mu Xin chose to continue to pursue his dream.
1946 65438+ 10, Mu Xin was admitted to Shanghai Academy of Fine Arts as a transfer student and entered the first year of three-year western painting major.
This time, Mu Xin fought against fate and accepted the most advanced and professional art education in China at that time. The school is composed of predecessors such as Cai Yuanpei and Liu Haili. They are committed to creating an inclusive and academic freedom style, which Mu Xin appreciates very much.
In this regard, he sincerely said: "The' freedom' I enjoyed at Shanghai Art Institute is just like the sky and the sea."
On the road of pursuing art, Mu Xin's second choice took place around the founding of New China.
1949 Since the spring, Mu Xin has been teaching in Hang Cheng Senior Middle School in Zhejiang Province, and he is "obedient and deeply loved by students". During his work, Mu Xin also briefly participated in the Southern Cultural and Art Troupe of the 2nd1Army of the China People's Liberation Army as a cultural officer, mainly engaged in propaganda work.
However, a sentence by the French writer Flaubert deeply influenced Mu Xin-"If you decide your life with art, you can't live like ordinary people."
Therefore, on 1950, Mu Xin resigned from his well-paid and "ordinary" teaching job. He firmly believes that warmth, stability and richness are harmful to his artistic life.
Therefore, Mu Xin's choice of art is pure.
Professor Sun Yu said that Mu Xin is an unclassified writer.
In other words, ordinary writers often have their own labels in the history of literature, which is the so-called academic habit.
Professor Sun Yu gives examples in his article, realism or romanticism, Beijing school or Shanghai school, all of which are the positioning of writers.
However, Mu Xin does not need to be classified or defined, so it is temporarily called "the guest outside the door". Professor Sun Yu also believes that there is no fixed position suitable for Mu Xin in the history of contemporary literature.
Moreover, he also believes that such a classification is to lock a person's mental state with a certain concept, which is problematic.
Therefore, Professor Sun Yu is "not interested in typicality".
In fact, if you look through the historical materials, you will find that many geniuses that have appeared in history are not in the daily concept at all.
For example, there were many strange people in the Six Dynasties, and Mu Xin liked them very much. Because he transcends the concept and is not in the general mental classification.
Mu Xin added: "Ji Kang's talent, style and demeanor are typical? I feel sick as soon as I hear the word' typical'. "
It can be seen that Mu Xin rejected and even despised the concept of typicality. He believes that the uniqueness of human beings should be respected and cannot be simply treated and defined; Otherwise, it is far from human nature.
Mu Xin has this idea because of his experience.
When Mu Xin was young, various doctrines prevailed; He can't avoid customs, and he has also participated in various trends.
However, after all this, Mu Xin was "tired of those thoughts and began to look for the cover of the existence of socialism". He said: "Everything is clumsy, and socialism is clumsy."
You see, from Mu Xin's words, we seem to feel a little pain. Because, according to Mu Xin, a good artist can never be described simply by concept.
Therefore, Professor Sun Yu pointed out that Mu Xin's idea is very similar to that of Mr. Kant-he is wary of the empirical form of human cognition.
The reason is that people's cognitive experience is often subjective, while the object described is objective and inaccurate.
If we use a very precise concept to describe it, we will fall into "antinomy"
What is antinomy?
Professor Sun Yu explained that just like a person has both the eyes of a judge and the eyes of a lover, this leads to "antinomy".
Mu Xin said: "Do you feel that there is a gap between the two laws, and the gap between the two opposite laws is the venue for my game and writing?"
From this example, we can see that Mu Xin's way of understanding the world is completely different from the writers we know.
Some people say that reading his articles will remind you of Nietzsche and the way of understanding "being" expressed in China's Buddhist scriptures.
In a word, Mu Xin is unique, and it doesn't need to be defined.
A comprehensive and detailed analysis of Mu Xin, the writer and painter in The Outsider, makes us seem to see a "living, three-dimensional" Mu Xin.
Flaubert said that among all the lies, art is real.
And so is Mu Xin-his thinking, cognition and persistence in art are true and pure.