Why do children who have just entered primary school from kindergarten have so many problems? Is there any way to help children adapt to primary school life quickly? This is what I am talking about with you today: all for the children.
1. Changes faced by children in the transition from childhood to adolescence
Children in the connection stage between kindergarten and primary school usually face six changes:
1. Changes in teacher-student relationship:
In kindergarten, teachers are more concerned with children's lives, and the relationship between teachers and children has become a family relationship. The requirements for children in learning activities are relatively simple, and children's learning activities are very relaxed and happy.
Entering primary school is different. Teachers and parents have very high expectations for children's learning, which makes children have certain pressure and burden. Because primary school teachers have to complete teaching tasks and focus on teaching, there are fewer opportunities to care about students' lives. The communication between teachers and students is mainly in the classroom, and there is little personal contact between teachers and students, so the new children may not adapt.
2. Changes in classroom teaching
In kindergarten, games are the main activity mode of kindergarten education, and learning while playing is advocated.
In primary school, it is a formal classroom teaching method, which focuses on written language, emphasizing systematic education of cultural knowledge and basic skills training such as reading, writing and arithmetic. The rest and competition time is short. Children face four classes in the morning and two classes in the afternoon every day, and they must finish a certain amount of homework after class.
3. Changes in the code of conduct
In kindergarten, children have a lot of time and right to choose their own activities, while in primary school, students choose their own activities very little, and most of the time they have to obey the unified requirements. The head teacher of our school will conduct special training on code of conduct. )
4. Changes in interpersonal relationships
After entering primary school, children are separated from their peers in kindergarten and come to a new environment. They need to re-establish new interpersonal relationships, take the initiative to make new friends and integrate into the new class atmosphere as soon as possible.
5. Changes in expectations of parents and teachers
When children are in kindergarten, parents and teachers mainly consider children's nutrition, mental health and physical health. Children eat well, play well, study well and get along well with their peers in kindergarten. What we expect is that children are lively, happy and healthy. Once a child enters primary school, the expectations of parents and teachers will change greatly. In addition to hoping that children will be healthy and happy, they also hope that their academic performance will be excellent. In order to study, children will spend less time playing games and watching TV.
6. Communication of learning environment
Entering primary school, the free, lively and free learning environment in early childhood is transformed into a learning environment with subjects, homework and teacher control. If children can't adapt to this environment quickly, it is easy to have learning disabilities.
Therefore, solving these problems is the key to do a good job in youth cohesion.
Because of these changes, it is normal for children to have some discomfort after entering primary school. Our parents should treat them correctly, patiently and meticulously help their children to get through the transition period smoothly, and let them adapt to primary school life quickly.
Second, what preparations should parents make in the young connection?
Young convergence is not only a matter for kindergartens and primary schools, but also influenced by family and social factors. Among them, the role of parents can not be ignored. Because children's living habits, self-care ability, physical fitness, learning attitude and ability, and social adaptability are inseparable from their parents' words and deeds. Parents are their first teachers. (Public service advertisement: A child's mother washes her feet. The child saw it and took the initiative to bring water to wash his mother's feet. When the childish little boy said "Mother washed his feet", it touched the hearts of many parents all over the world. This is a model of setting an example. )
1, psychological preparation
(1) Overcome anxiety. The anxiety of new parents is often caused by paying too much attention to their children's enrollment. Children are going to primary school, which is very important and common in the process of children's growth. Most children will adapt smoothly with the help of teachers and parents, and parents need not worry too much. In addition, our primary school life is rich and colorful, and there are many colorful activities, which are far less boring and hard than imagined. Parents should not give their children too much negative reinforcement of "hard work". Learning should be a kind of happiness, and parents should tell their children with their relaxed mood that primary school study life is pleasant and worth yearning for.
(2) compare carefully. Due to fierce competition, colleagues and friends will inevitably compare their children's schools and teachers. Parents should carefully grasp the scale of comparison. Otherwise, it is easy to cause psychological imbalance, and the so-called distance produces beauty. What you get is always better than what you can't get. Believe in your own judgment and choice, which will lay a good foundation for children and parents to integrate into school culture faster and better in the future.
(3) know how to appreciate. Children are going to primary school, and entering a new environment will inevitably encounter many obstacles. Instead of nagging him all day, it is better to observe and appreciate his progress from small details, give him a kind of support and confidence, and let such confidence encourage him to solve more and more problems by himself. (Praise should be specific. If you praise your child's progress, don't say it in general, but specifically what he has improved, such as: your handwriting is really beautiful, you really love working, the teacher praises you for listening to so many people, and so on. Give the child the right direction. He will know how to do it and will do it better in the future. )
(4) Wait patiently. There are differences among children, such as heredity, age, gender, family education and so on. Parents can't expect their children to be all right, no one is perfect, let alone their children. Otherwise, you will only see the child's shortcomings. For children's shortcomings, parents should not only guide them persistently, but also wait patiently. The growth of children needs a process. It takes three generations to make a gentleman.
(5) Pay attention to interpersonal communication. Parents lay a good foundation for education by establishing a good parent-child relationship with their children. Parents should pay special attention to getting along with their children and set an example to cultivate their interpersonal skills. If children are required to be polite, parents should also respect and be polite to others; Parents should first let their children care and help others. In short, what parents ask their children to do must be done first. Only in this way can children quickly like primary school teachers and classmates, thus enjoying their study and primary school life.
In addition, parents should chat with their children, especially in the first month of their children's new school, to help them understand the school correctly. We should know that primary schools are places to study, and primary school students mainly study, do homework, take exams and study hard in order to gain something and become an excellent primary school student.
(7) Effective communication:
Educating children depends on communication 80% and guidance 20%. First, parents should be clear about the purpose of communication:
1. Satisfy children's desire to be understood.
2. Express concern and give spiritual encouragement.
3. release the pressure.
4. Guide correctly.
Communication mode:
1, learn to understand and respect, and get along with children as equals.
When I was teaching senior one, a parent in our class told her that her children had a headache because she was always unwilling to do what she asked her children to do, or even if she did, she was reluctant. I asked her how to make children do things. She said that at home, she often said, "Go, bring the cup." "Bring the newspaper." "Go and do your homework." I suggest that when she asks the child to do one more thing, she might as well change her way of speaking: help her mother with the cup, ok? I believe it would be much better to change the tone of the order to the tone of euphemistic discussion. Later, the parent did this, and the child really became willing to do things.
"Bring the cup." And "help mom with the cup, will you?" The two sentences sound similar to those of adults, but the feelings of children are quite different. Although children are small, they don't like the imperative tone, but they like being entrusted. Being entrusted will make children feel respected and needed, which is one of the basic psychological needs of people, and so is children. When a person is respected and needed, his heart is warm, safe and relaxed, which can bring the psychological distance between people closer. Therefore, when parents ask their children to do something, as the nurturers of children, if it is always difficult to forget their role as "educators" and condescending, it will be difficult to maintain an equal position when communicating with children. It can be seen that only by understanding and respecting children can we truly live in equality and harmony.
What children don't like to hear:
Why are you so stupid? If you don't study well, don't think of anything good.
You lazy bastard, you have never done anything for me. What is the use of learning music well?
If I get 100, I will reward you 10 yuan. Go and study, and don't worry about other things.
Children's favorite words:
Be brave, son. You can make a mistake. It doesn't matter, as long as it is corrected, it is still a good boy.
Son, the teacher praised you for listening carefully in class. Mom is so happy for you.
Your handwriting is correct, clean and beautiful. That's great. You are a good boy.
"You are a good boy" is a favorite sentence of children.
Parents are willing to give their children all the beautiful things in the world, but think about it carefully. Have we given this sentence to his children's favorite?
Man is an animal who likes to be loved and understood by others. Children whose hearts are as transparent and fragile as glass need our care and appreciation more. For children, it is important to have the spirit of self-confidence and self-love. This spirit is like the roots of plants. The deeper and wider, the bigger the fruit.
In short, it can change a child's life!
So how can parents communicate with their children when they come home from school one day? I often hear some parents say that when I go home, I will ask: Have you finished your homework? Is there anything wrong? Can such a question arouse the good feelings of children? Son, is he willing to communicate with you? He'll think you look like a policeman. I suggest that parents can really communicate effectively with their children by starting with the following questions:
1. What good things did you see at school today? (frontal guidance)
2. What did you do well in school? (praise in time)
3. What did you gain today? (Prompt encouragement)
4. What can I do for my mother? (Eliminate psychological pressure)
2. Learn to listen and tell the truth.
When parents communicate with their children, they often only care about "speaking freely". In fact, they are blocking their ears or shutting them up. If it goes on, it will become a common mistake-preaching, and it is empty preaching. Children also have the desire to communicate and hope that their words can be well listened to.
Whenever a child talks to his parents, parents should put down what they are doing as much as possible and concentrate on listening to the child. This can make children feel that their parents care about listening to him, and children feel respected and encouraged, and will be willing to express their feelings. This is parent-child communication. Communication between parents and children is very important, but in this kind of communication, parents should pay attention to one thing: talk less and listen more.
Being good at listening does not mean blindly accommodating and letting go without criticism and education. When talking with children, parents should be good at conveying their inner thoughts and wishes to children accurately, so that children can feel the care and goodwill contained in their parents' "criticism" and "education" and avoid causing children's resistance. Instead of criticizing children, it is better to tell them a story that explains the truth. Introduce a series of books, such as short stories, chicken soup for the soul, 100 stories that touched primary school students and so on.
3. Learn to hug and whisper
Have you ever seen such an article "Have you ever hugged or whispered?" ? It says: "In hugs, people can gain a sense of security and trust, which is a whole-hearted rest. Anxiety can be alleviated and calmed down. People are the most rational when they are emotionally and psychologically stable. " "Whispering is more convincing and touching than the expression at normal volume. Because just whispering gestures have already indicated the special intimate relationship between the two. "
The vast majority of parents love their children deeply, but because we in China still have some subtle ways to express our feelings, this kind of love for children is often manifested in material things and lacks spiritual care. For children, especially those who have just entered school, we should always use language, movements, expressions and gestures to make children feel the love of their parents. Especially when the child encounters difficulties and setbacks, put your hand on the child's shoulder, look him (her) in the eyes and say to him, "No matter what happens, mom and dad love you, and we know you can do it!" When a child's progress or achievement is rewarded, give a thumbs-up and sincerely praise the child: "Son, you are really the pride of your mother. Well done! " You know, it is such a seemingly casual action that a simple sentence will bring great comfort and warmth to children's hearts. (The truth that educating people should cultivate the mind)
2. Study preparation
It is not those children who lack knowledge before entering school that make teachers have a headache at school, but those children who are completely uninterested in learning and do not like thinking. How to make children have knowledge, interest and ability? I think it is necessary for us to understand the necessary abilities and qualities in learning. If children have these abilities and qualities, it will greatly promote learning.
(1) Cultivate children's listening ability. Good listening will be an important guarantee for children's high-quality learning efficiency in the future. Therefore, parents should pay special attention to cultivating children's listening habits in their daily communication with their children. As usual, children are required to look at the speaker when listening to others, and don't interrupt others casually. After communicating with others, ask your child simple questions about the content of the communication and test whether the child has heard clearly. For example, after listening to the story, ask the children to simply repeat the main contents of the listening, and so on.
Avoid: Parents should not talk repeatedly when talking to their children. (Say it three times, it's lighter than water. )
(2) Cultivate children's reading ability.
"Open book is beneficial", as long as reading will be beneficial. "Reading a good book is like making a good friend." These famous sayings all illustrate the benefits of reading.
Now Chinese teaching in primary schools advocates "separation of knowledge and practice". It is a word that needs knowledge, not necessarily words. The purpose is to build a three-dimensional reading framework for children. For example, in the first textbook of senior one, based on the principle of "recognize more and write less", it is required to know 400 commonly used Chinese characters and write 100 of them, which highlights the key points of literacy. How can students remember so many words? Only read more!
Then, after all, the time for extracurricular reading is limited, which requires parents to arrange at least 20 minutes of fixed parent-child reading time for their children every day. Many parents in our class are a little busy with work or business, but most of them have prepared some illustrated, meaningful and childlike pinyin books for their children, such as fairy tales, idiom stories and fables. These simple and illustrated books are suitable for junior children to read, which increases their reading opportunities. Small bookshelves are prepared in the room so that they can choose and read their favorite books at will. And set 20 minutes before going to bed every night as the reading time for parents and children. Parents read stories to their children, or let them read aloud to cultivate their self-confidence. Read the words you know directly, and read them with pinyin if you don't know them. Parents can ask some simple questions after reading it. If you read well and speak well, you should be encouraged in time, such as drawing a smiling face on the book and a star to reward you. Practice has proved that parents and children studying together can form a harmonious learning atmosphere, establish a good parent-child relationship, cultivate children's attention and promote their interest in learning. After learning Pinyin in Grade One, our class began to write a Pinyin diary under my guidance. Those children who write well are all children who insist on reading every day. )
Therefore, our parents should pay attention to cultivating children's interest in literacy and let them read in life, in games and in reading. Knowing more words and reading more books is the educational goal of first-grade children.
(3) Cultivate children's attention
There are two main types of attention, one is unintentional attention, and the other is intentional attention.
To complete school learning activities, most of them rely on intentional attention. Children aged 3-6 have no intention of paying attention to dominance. For example, a child will pay attention to watching and listening to new and interesting things. As long as he is interested, he will carry out this activity for a long time.
Intentional attention has a purpose and needs the attention of will control. People's brains will be in a state of tension when they pay attention intentionally, and they will feel tired after a long time. Therefore, for children, it is difficult to turn unintentional attention into intentional attention without guidance and training, without putting forward the code of conduct that must be observed, and without completing the task.
Therefore, parents should help their children develop intentional attention when they first enter school, so that children can gradually learn to control their attention. Let's start playing games. For example, if you put four or five toys on the table, let the child look at them for 1-2 minutes, then let the child turn his head. You take off one of the toys, and then let the child turn his head and tell him the changes on the table. The game can increase the difficulty, for example, the number of toys is a little more, and changing the position of the left toys after removal can gradually shorten the observation time.
Children generally prefer to listen to stories, and parents can also let their children listen to recorded stories to develop their intentional attention. Ask a few questions before listening to the story, let him listen with questions and answer your questions after listening. You can also ask him to remember the story while listening and then repeat it to you.
As long as you can often play games with your child according to his situation, I believe that your child's attention will be improved soon.
(4) Cultivate children's language communication ability.
Communication depends on expression. Entering primary school and entering a new social circle, expression naturally becomes important. Usually, a person who is good at expression can easily gain the affirmation of others, and naturally gain full confidence. A taciturn child at school, it is difficult for teachers and classmates to know and like him in a short time; A child with poor expressive ability is likely to be regarded as stupid and ignorant by others. This situation often leads to children's lack of self-confidence, lack of interest in learning and even fear of going to school. Therefore, in daily life, parents should consciously create opportunities for children to express themselves orally, help children organize their language and improve their language ability. For example, let the child answer the phone, take the child to the mall, let him communicate with the aunt of the clerk, and let him pay. Go out to travel, let the children take the initiative to talk to the tour guide and learn more about the customs of the tourist destination.
(5) Training children to write correctly:
Writing is a kind of perceptual learning. If you don't teach at the right time, you will miss the opportunity, and premature teaching will bring a lot of trouble. The most common mistakes are children's posture and stroke order, which makes teachers spend more time guiding and correcting, and some can't even be corrected in junior high school and high school. Of course, in the kindergarten class next semester, children have already had some preparation activities for writing, but as parents, we should first pay attention to cultivating children's correct writing posture.
Writing posture:
Keep your head straight, your body straight, your shoulders flat, your arms open and your feet safe.
Write a song:
I did, I did,
Keep your head straight and your feet flat.
Eyes are a foot away from the book.
Punch the table with one's fist
Hands are only an inch from the tip of the pen.
Note: at home, our parents can instruct their children to recite and write nursery rhymes first, and then take out books to write them, so that they can learn them by heart and parents can correct them. Long-term adherence to children's good writing posture will certainly develop. So are other habits. Persistence is the most important thing. It usually takes more than three months to form good habits. As long as parents and children work together and persevere, they will certainly help children develop good writing habits quickly. Thoroughly
Step 3 prepare for life
Children in kindergartens depend on adults everywhere in their lives. After entering primary school, the situation suddenly changed. After school, you have to cross the street with the team to go home, and you have to adjust your schoolbag when you go to school. Therefore, it is also very important to cultivate and gradually transition one's life ability.
Usually let children do more things they can every day, especially eating, wearing undressed pants and making the bed, including sorting out schoolbags and stationery. Parents should not rely entirely on themselves, but should gradually establish their own scientific, convenient and accustomed biological clock. It is also necessary to change living habits and let children get up, sleep and eat according to the school work and rest system. Get up early in the morning, let the children have a full breakfast, don't eat snacks before lunch, go to bed early at night and watch less TV. You can also teach your child to know time and let him develop the concept of time. Prepare a small alarm clock to remind children to get up regularly, learn to master the time and not be late for school in the future. It is suggested that parents and children work out schedules together in order to better adapt to primary school life.
Show the students the schedule and arrange the study and entertainment time reasonably. )
4. Material preparation
Mainly to prepare the necessary stationery, which is comfortable, simple and practical. It is a pity that children lose and damage things that are too expensive. Children will not use complicated supplies too early, which will also affect their attention. Material preparation doesn't have to be brand-new, but the old ones at home can do it, so as not to cause children's pursuit of material things. Clothing should be simple and generous to facilitate children's activities. Don't pursue famous brands, lest children compare with each other and form bad habits. Because material wealth is not equal to spiritual wealth and success, it is our parents' responsibility to cultivate children's frugal and simple material outlook.
Fourth, educate children to have "three hearts"
First of all, be patient with children. Patience is the expression of people's cultivation, and patience with children is the greatest expression of love. Rude shouting and beating are all manifestations of impatience. I also saw a sentence on the internet. Some netizens said that sometimes it is very wrong to take the anger at work home and take it out on the children. This kind of behavior should be avoided. Even if the patient parents don't know much about educational theory, if they can talk to their children patiently and take the time to get to know them, the children will be willing to exchange their ideas with their parents, so that children who grow up in this environment are at least sound in personality and psychology, and a healthy personality will play a great role in their development when they grow up.
Secondly, educate children to be caring. This requires us to spend more time with our children. This is not a simple sentence, but to do it bit by bit. Of course, this kind of love is not doting. Because the child is still young and lacks consciousness, parents need to remind and urge him from time to time, and give him patient explanation and guidance, integrate some behavioral norms and discipline requirements into the story, teach him the truth of being a man, let him understand what is right and wrong, and then take action. Spend more time with children, encourage them and cultivate their trust in their parents. Children will naturally tell us their own problems and doubts, and let us communicate and solve them. Third, stick to yourself and your children. Parents' behavior is a role model for their children. Children should do well according to our requirements, first of all, they should manage their words and deeds, and must do what they say, so that children can remember their parents' requirements and do well by themselves. For example, we like watching TV very much, but for the sake of our children's study, we decided not to watch TV with him. After more than a year's efforts, the children's awareness of learning has made obvious progress, and we are also gratified and proud. In a word, perseverance is the most important thing. As long as we parents can educate and guide our children with perseverance, patience and love, then I believe our children will grow up healthily.
5. What is youth convergence?
We can use the following three sentences to test:
One is "interested in learning"
It is full of curiosity and interest in the learning content itself, and you can take the initiative to learn and ask questions if you don't understand it;
The second is "activities can adapt"
That is, in daily learning activities, I can live in harmony with my family, friends, teachers and classmates;
The third is "life is organized"
In other words, you can arrange your basic daily life, including study, on your own, without the urge of adults.
In short, it is the unshirkable responsibility and obligation of schools, teachers and parents to let children enter primary schools smoothly from kindergarten. Our teachers and parents feel the same way. We have the same starting point and common desire, that is, everything is for children ... finally, I will send you an encouraging word: every flower has its own spring, and every child has a chance to embrace success!