Deal with children who lose their temper easily.
Worth learning
1, stay calm and don't respond to parents too quickly, which will easily arouse your anger and cause extra harm and pressure to your children. Give the boy some space to calm down at his own pace. Before that, parents should take a rest and adjust their breathing. Make sure you can calmly deal with the situation before you react. You know, parents are peaceful, and children's bad temper can be alleviated.
2. Put him in "temporary isolation"
When a boy is angry and refuses to talk, in order not to hurt his self-esteem, you can take him to a quiet place first and let him vent. At the same time, tell him to have a good talk with him as long as he calms down. "Temporary isolation" is by no means snubbing him, let alone punishing or threatening him, but avoiding confrontation with the boy. Always let the boy know that we allow you to express negative emotions and accept your negative emotions. Whether you cry or make fun, we are all here.
3. Guide boys to express their emotions in a caring tone. Emotionally, boys often cannot express their feelings. Sometimes they want to express their anger but say "I hate you" and "you are a bad guy" to their parents. You know, every naughty child who loses his temper is a frustrated child. He is not "looking for trouble", but lacks encouragement and care. When he calms down, his parents should help him patiently and guide him to express his feelings and thoughts. For example, "Are you angry because of xx?" Listen carefully to his expression, don't interrupt in a hurry, and let him have enough time to distinguish his emotions.
4. Pay attention to children's needs, including boys' weak physical and emotional expression ability, which needs parents' seeing and understanding. Especially when he has a bad temper, think about whether he is uncomfortable. Is your body hurt or your feelings unsatisfied? What parents want is not to nag and demand the boy, but to enter his world through his expressions and actions. Linking the child's behavior with his inner needs can not only help him understand his emotions, but also let him know himself.
5. Provide boys with the option to choose smart parents, not to fill in the blanks for boys, but to choose multiple-choice questions. Especially when the boy's needs are out of date or will have some bad effects, let him choose: "Do you want to restrain yourself or stick to your own ideas, but you must bear the corresponding consequences." This is also to exercise the self-control of boys. If he chooses the former, he should be encouraged and praised, and be sure that he is reasonable. But if he chooses the latter, he must inform the consequences in advance, and let him know what his actions will cost. Only by not doting and indulging can we discipline him well.
6. Give a clear explanation when you are dissatisfied. Boys also have their own will. When they are strongly rejected, it is easy to accumulate more negative emotions in their hearts. If parents rely on authority to tell the boy "I have the final say", it will often cause contradictions. Say "no" to the boy and tell him what your specific reason is. For example, don't let him buy any more toys, because he has promised not to buy them when he goes out, or there are already many toys of the same type at home. Explain the reasons clearly, so as not to deny his needs, but also protect his self-confidence and guide him to understand and control his behavior.
7, you can express the same reason, but the attitude must be determined to communicate with boys, must be gentle and firm. Put yourself in his shoes to understand how he wants something or realizes a wish. But if he has been testing his parents' bottom line with his own behavior, he will still cry and get angry. Parents should also stick to their own position and not give in casually. Let him realize that parents will not agree to things that violate the rules and touch on principles. In this way, he gradually learned to give up threatening his parents by losing his temper.
8. Don't be angry with children, give them a good example, be angry with children, and discipline them by beating them. It is a kind of laziness in education, and its disadvantages far outweigh its advantages. Writer james baldwin said: "Children are never good at listening to their elders, but they never miss imitating their elders."
It is a wrong demonstration for parents to lose their temper, and it is easy for boys to mistakenly think that this is the correct way to solve the problem. So no matter what the situation is, no matter how frustrating the problem is, you should restrain yourself and don't break into a furious rage in front of the children. Remember, parents' good or bad moods bring their children a completely different direction in life.
9. In any case, let children feel love. Psychological research has found that the biggest source of children's inner anger. They have a deep-rooted belief that they are unloved. Like girls, when boys are willful and irritable, they are most afraid of their parents' rejection and neglect. He also needs hugs, kisses and gentle physical contact. More positive encouragement and more loving hugs! Let him know that even if his behavior is disappointing, his parents will love him unconditionally and accept him.