First, big data analysis: ten major issues of family education. The Chinese Academy of Educational Sciences has conducted a survey of 40,000 parents and children across the country. This survey was conducted in four provinces of China, and the results were finally released and serialized in China Education News. There are about ten main conclusions:
1. What do parents care most about their children in China?
Most parents in China care about success rather than adulthood. They care about the present. And we haven't paid enough attention to several key issues that really determine children's future, such as hobbies. In fact, people's hobbies are a very important aspect of their understanding of this society. Only paying attention to academic performance is not conducive to the cultivation of children's curiosity and interest. In fact, children's emotions, interpersonal skills, self-management ability, personality and personality characteristics are much more important than these issues that parents are most concerned about.
2. Is preschool important for children?
The survey results show that among children with poor academic performance, there are more children who have attended preschool than those who have never attended preschool 10.89%, which subverts many people's past ideas. Many of our parents want their children not to lose at the starting line, but to win at the starting line, so they should learn earlier and learn more than others. In fact, children need childhood, children need games, they need fun, and they need to find out for themselves. He won't be interested in what you force him to learn. Let the child have a rebellious attitude towards learning too early, and let him be afraid of learning before entering school.
3. What is the significance and function of choosing a school?
Everyone needs to choose a school, and many parents want to send their children to the best school. Big data analysis found that there was no difference between the best students who chose a school and the best students who didn't choose a school, accounting for 29.95% and 28.48% respectively. Of course, this does not mean that choosing a good school is meaningless to the development of students. Frankly speaking, because schools are literate, children between schools interact with each other. Children have a greater influence on each other than school. The key is why some schools are not effective. For those children with relatively weak foundation, they may have a sense of security and self-confidence in other schools. Going to the best school will make him feel hopeless in front of so many schoolmasters and his academic performance will drop.
4. Can students attend extracurricular classes to effectively improve their grades?
About 90% of children in China attend extracurricular classes. After attending extracurricular classes, children's time and space are occupied, and the possibility of autonomous learning is not enough. In this way, learning ability will shrink and development will be greatly limited. In addition, extracurricular classes are relatively a continuation of school life, textbooks and classrooms, and students do not have an opportunity to broaden their horizons. A child can't develop well without a lot of extra-curricular reading time.
5. Can material stimulation stimulate students' enthusiasm for learning?
Many families use bonuses and various temptations to encourage their children to study. The survey found that the results were not as big as we thought. What is more important? It is the consistency and coordination of parental education that can stimulate children's learning. For example, when parents disagree on education, they can communicate, share and negotiate privately, instead of quarreling in front of their children. The material stimulation is far less than the positive influence of parents on their children.
6. What are parents doing in their spare time?
The survey found that the proportion of children whose parents are studying, reading books and reading newspapers is the highest, accounting for 3 1.3 1%. Parents also watch TV, play computer and watch mobile phones, and the proportion of children with excellent grades is much less, which is 27.43%; Only 24.90% of the children of parents who especially like friends' parties get excellent grades. I believe that there is a big gap between these data in real life, but it is not as big as I thought.
7. How much does students' self-management ability affect their study?
In order to let the child concentrate on his studies, many parents have prepared everything for him and refused to let him do all the work. The results show that children can do housework as long as they study well, and only 3. 17% have excellent academic performance. Excellent children who think they should do housework and manage their own affairs well account for 86.92%. Let the child learn to manage his own affairs, which will ultimately help him manage his own study. Learning is a process of self-management, and this conclusion is very important for many parents.
8. What role do parents play in their children's growth?
In many families in China, the father is invisible, the so-called "shadow father". The real role of father in family education is far from being brought into play. The survey found that in 90% of families in China, fathers did not undertake the responsibility of education. In most families, mothers are responsible for children's education, but we know that the lack of father's education has obvious limitations on the development of children's character: for example, gender identity will be weakened, and it will be easily over-cared and protected by mothers, lacking opportunities for independent exercise and lacking masculinity.
9. Do China's parents know their children?
Through the survey of parents, it is found that parents first know how many good friends their children have, and then they know which teacher and class their children like. Parents don't go into their children's hearts, don't know what their children want, don't know what their children don't want to tell their parents, and who their children admire? Did not understand the child's needs, did not understand the real situation of the child's heart.
10. Are students' academic achievements related to their upbringing?
Parents adopt positive parenting styles, and their children's academic performance is relatively high; However, parents' parenting style is relatively negative, and their children's academic performance is relatively poor. It shows that children's academic performance is closely related to their parents' parenting style.
Second, three key words in family education 1, companionship
Children come to the family and become a community with you. This is the fate of life. How can we cherish the time with children? In fact, we know that it is difficult for you to be with your child when he really leaves you. So the real time together is very limited, and being together is education in itself. I think this is crucial. Why?
Because you eat and talk with children, you are always communicating and learning. There is an interesting study in western psychology. They found that in family communication, especially at the dinner table, children's vocabulary is directly and positively correlated with their parents' vocabulary.
You are talking about politics, and this child may be interested in politics in the future; If you are complaining, the child may be full of complaints. Everything that happens in your family will have a direct impact on your children. Why should there be sufficient communication between parents and children? Many of our parents think it is meaningless not to talk to their children. In fact, everything you say, even if he doesn't understand it today, will become an important part of his brain thinking.
What's more important is to accompany and live together, which will determine whether the whole family has a common destiny. We put forward an idea: reading, writing and living together. The keynote is companionship, and the influence of companionship on children is very important.
Step 2 read
The seeds of reading are planted in the family. There is a poem in the reading manual, "you may have unlimited wealth, boxes of jewelry and cabinets of gold." But you will never be richer than me. I have a mother who reads to me. " Reading is an important source for children to have a rich spiritual life. The cultivation of reading ability, reading interest and reading habits begins at home.
For children, childhood reading is related to education, and a family without reading will never have a real education.
After reading these books, children began to like reading. Why is it important for children to read early? I always think that those children's books are really different from those read by adults. Children's books will contain the best things of human beings in the fate of human beings and animals, and build your values.
Step 3 get used to it
Habits, to a large extent, education is to cultivate habits. Mr. Ye Shengtao said that education is to cultivate habits. It's right to think about it. To measure the success of education is to measure whether a person has developed good habits. How does he treat people? Sports is not how high you jump, how fast you run and how well you play. In fact, the most important thing in exercise is to see if you have developed good fitness habits. If you exercise well, eat, drink and don't exercise, and your health is poor, it's not called sports success.
Psychological research points out that a good habit needs 2 1 day of continuous training. How to help students develop good behavior habits, whether it is sports or reading? I think this should be cultivated in the family. For example, going to bed early and getting up early is a good habit. For a child, a good habit can affect his life.