The most important thing for parents in family education is to grasp the law of children's psychological development, which can make the educational effect more effective. We must see ten psychological laws applicable to children:

The law of psychology 1: Rosenthal effect

Rosenthal, a famous American psychologist, once did such an experiment:

He randomly divided a group of mice into group A and group B, and told the breeder of group A that the mice were very clever. At the same time, he told the breeder of group B that the mice in his group had average intelligence. A few months later, the professor tested two groups of mice crossing the maze, and found that the mice in group A were indeed smarter than those in group B. They could get out of the maze first and find food.

So Professor Rosenthal was inspired. He wants to know whether this effect will also happen to people. He came to an ordinary middle school, walked casually in a class, and then circled a few names on the list of students, telling their teachers that these students had high IQ and were very smart. After a while, the professor came to this middle school again, and the miracle happened again. Those students selected by him have really become the best in the class.

Law analysis:? Hint? This magical power has played a great role.

Everyone will accept psychological hints in one way or another in life, some of which are positive and some are negative. Mother is the child's favorite, most trusted and most dependent person, and also the person who gives psychological hints. If it is a long-term negative and bad psychological suggestion, it will affect the child's mood and even seriously affect the child's mental health. On the contrary, if a mother places high hopes on her child, gives positive affirmation, moistens her child's mind through expectant eyes, approving smiles and encouraging words, and makes her child more self-respecting, self-loving, self-confident and self-reliant, then how high your expectations are, how great your child's future achievements will be!

Psychological Law 2: Over-limit Effect

Mark, a famous American writer? Twain once listened to a priest's speech in church. At first, he thought that the priest spoke very well and was very touching, so he was ready to donate money. 10 minutes later, before the priest finished speaking, he got a little impatient and decided to donate only some small change. After another 10 minute, the priest hasn't finished yet and decided not to donate 1 minute. When the priest finally finished his long speech and began to raise money, mark? Because of his anger, Twain not only didn't donate money, but also stole 2 yuan's money from the plate.

Legal analysis:

This psychological phenomenon caused by too much stimulation, too strong stimulation and too long action time is called? Over-limit effect? .

Overlimit effect often appears in family education. For example, if a child makes a mistake, parents will repeatedly criticize the same thing once, twice, three times or even four or five times, which will make the child from guilt to impatience and even disgust. Is it? Urgent? Will it appear? Do I have to do this? Rebellious psychology and behavior.

It can be seen that the mother's criticism of the child cannot exceed the limit. What should she do with the child? Make a mistake and criticize only once? . If you have to criticize again, don't simply repeat it. We should put it another way. In this way, children won't feel the same mistake? Hold on. Boredom and rebellious psychology will also be reduced.

Law of Psychology 3: Desi Effect

Psychologist Desi once said such a fable:

There are a group of children frolicking in front of an old man's house, screaming all over the sky. A few days passed, and the old man couldn't bear it. So, he came out and gave each child 10 cents and said to them, you have made this place very lively. I feel much younger. I thank you for giving me this little money. ? The children were very happy and came the next day, playing as usual. The old man came out again and gave each child 5 cents. Five cents is not bad, but the child left happily. On the third day, the old man only gave each child 2 cents, and the children flew into a rage. It's only 2 cents a day. Do you know how hard we work? ? They swore to the old man that they would never play for him again!

Legal analysis:

In this fable, the old man's method is very simple. Will he become the inner motivation of children? Play for your own happiness? Become an external motive? Playing and getting points? And he manipulated the external factor of fraction, so he also manipulated the child's behavior.

Desi effect appears from time to time in life. For example, parents often say to their children: If you get 100 in this exam, will you be rewarded with 100 yuan? 、? If you can get into the top five, you will get a new toy reward? Wait a minute. Parents may not have thought that it is this improper reward mechanism that reduces children's interest in learning little by little.

In learning, parents should guide their children to set up lofty ideals, enhance their emotions and interests in learning, increase the motivation of learning itself, and help children reap the fun of learning. Parents' rewards can be things that are helpful for learning, such as books and learning tools, while some rewards that have nothing to do with learning are best not.

Psychological Law 4: South Wind Effect

South wind? The effect is also called Warm? Effect, originated from the French writer La? A fable written by Feng Dan:

The north wind and the south wind are worse. Let's see who can take off the coat of pedestrians. The north wind came first with a cold wind, biting cold. As a result, pedestrians wrapped their coats tightly to resist the invasion of the north wind. The south wind blows slowly, and the sun shines suddenly. Pedestrians feel that spring warms their upper body, so they unbutton their buttons first and then take off their coats. Nanfeng won.

Legal analysis:

The reason why the south wind can achieve the purpose in the story is that it meets people's internal needs. What is this psychological reaction to stimulate self-reflection and meet self-needs? South wind effect? .

Therefore, it is adopted in family education. A stick? 、? Threats? Like the north wind? Traditional educational methods are not desirable. Carry out warm education, more? Human touch? Type of praise, cultivate children's conscious upward, can achieve twice the result with half the effort.

The fifth law of psychology: barrel effect

? Barrel? The effect is that the amount of water in the barrel with uneven bottle mouth is not the longest board on the barrel, but the shortest board on the barrel.

Legal analysis:

Children's comprehensive academic performance is like a vat, and each academic performance is an indispensable plank that constitutes this vat. The stable formation of children's good academic performance cannot rely on the outstanding achievements of a certain subject, but should rely on its overall situation, especially some weak links. Therefore, when children are found to be deficient in some subjects, they should be reminded to spend more time on this subject in time, so as to achieve it? Learn from each other? .

Law of Psychology 6: Hawthorne Effect

The discovery of Hawthorne effect comes from a failed management research. 1924165438+1October, the National Research Council of the United States entered the Hawthorne factory of Westinghouse Electric Company. Their original intention is to try to find ways to improve labor productivity by improving external factors such as working conditions and environment. They selected six female workers in the relay workshop as the observation objects. In the seven stages of the experiment, the host constantly changed the factors such as lighting, salary, rest time, lunch and environment, but unfortunately, no matter how the external factors changed, the production efficiency of the experimental group kept rising.

After nine years of experiments and research, scholars finally realized that people are not only stimulated by external factors, but also have their own subjective incentives. When six female workers were drawn out as a group, they realized that they were a special group. This feeling of attention makes them work harder to prove that they are excellent. In this way, their subtle psychology prompted their output to rise and then rise!

What do we call an increase in performance or effort due to extra attention? Hawthorne effect? . This is extremely common in school education. In foreign schools, every student will take an intelligence test when entering school, and according to the results of the intelligence test, students will be divided into excellent classes and ordinary classes. Results In a routine inspection, it was found that the test scores of a group of students who entered school a year ago were reversed because of some mistakes, but what about the course scores this year? Excellent class? Significantly high? Regular class? Ordinary children are regarded as top students, and they themselves think they are excellent. Extra attention and psychological hints make the ugly duckling really become a white swan.

Legal analysis:

Hawthorne effect tells us: from the perspective of others, white lies and praises can really make a person; From your own point of view, you can be who you think you are.

Psychological law 7: increase and decrease effect

In interpersonal communication? Increase or decrease the effect? Does anyone want the other person to like him? Increase? Instead of. Constantly decreasing? . For example, many salespeople have grasped this psychology. When weighing goods for customers, we always grab a small pile and add them bit by bit, instead of grabbing a large pile and taking them out bit by bit.

Legal analysis:

When we evaluate a child, it is inevitable that we will tell all his shortcomings and advantages and often adopt them? Praise first and then derogate? The method. In fact, this is a very unsatisfactory evaluation method. When evaluating children, we might as well use? Increase or decrease the effect? For example, let's talk about children's minor problems that don't hurt their dignity, and then give them appropriate praise?

Law 8 of Psychology: Butterfly Effect

According to research, the weak airflow caused by a butterfly flapping its wings occasionally in the southern hemisphere will turn into a tornado sweeping Texas in a few weeks due to the mixture of other factors! Disordered people call this phenomenon? Butterfly effect? And made a theoretical statement: a small reason, after a certain amount of time and other factors, can develop into a very huge and complex impact.

Legal analysis:

? Butterfly effect? Tell us that educating children is no small matter. The expression of a word, the handling of a thing, and the correctness and appropriateness may affect the child's life; Errors and arbitrariness may delay a child's life.

Law of Psychology 9: Label Effect

During World War II, the United States was short of soldiers, and the war really needed a group of soldiers. Therefore, the United States decided to organize prisoners in prisons to fight in the front. To this end, the United States sent several psychologists to train and mobilize prisoners before the war, and went to the front to fight with them.

During the training, psychologists did not preach to them too much, but emphasized that prisoners should write a letter to their closest relatives every week. The content of the letter was drawn up by psychologists, describing how the prisoner behaved in prison and how to turn over a new leaf. The experts asked the prisoners to copy carefully and send them to their dearest people. Three months later, the prisoners went to the front, and the experts asked the prisoners to write letters to their relatives, telling them how to obey orders and how to be brave. As a result, the performance of these prisoners on the battlefield is no less than that of the regular army. As they said in the letter, they obeyed orders and fought bravely in the battle. Later psychologists called this phenomenon? Label effect? Psychologically, it is also called the suggestive effect.

Legal analysis:

This psychological law plays an extremely important role in family education. For example, if we always yell at our children? Idiot? 、? Pig head? 、? Why are you so stupid? 、? Can't even do such a simple topic? Wait, after a long time, the child may really become what we say? Idiot? .

Therefore, mothers must abstain from ridicule and humiliation, from complaining, from threats and intimidation, and label their children positively with more inspiring language.

Law of Psychology 10: Foot-in-Door Effect

A phenomenon often occurs in daily life: when you ask for help from others, if you ask for higher requirements from the beginning, it is easy to be rejected; And if you make a small request first, and then increase the weight of the request after others agree, it will be easier to achieve the goal. This phenomenon is called by psychologists? Door effect? .

Legal analysis:

We can also use it in family education? Door effect? . For example, first put forward lower requirements for children, and then affirm, praise or even reward them after they have done as required, and then gradually raise the requirements so that children are willing to make endless efforts.

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