While his wife was not paying attention, the husband quietly took out a bottle from the refrigerator and pulled the child into the small study for the child to eat secretly.
After eating the second bottle, the little girl said she wanted to drink the third bottle. When her father hesitated, the little girl began to cry again. At this time, my father also thought that drinking too much might really have diarrhea, so he whispered, "You are not good. I'll tell my mother and let her teach you a lesson!" " "
In some families, mothers educate their children and fathers play the devil's advocate?
Such naysayers sometimes do it on purpose. He may not agree with his wife's practice, but he does not communicate with her directly, but through a "slow-moving" way; Sometimes it's not intentional. Dad just loves children and gives in. This is what we usually say, mom "plays the bad COP" and dad "plays the bad COP". "Singing a good face" is a constraint and criticism to children; "Good COP" means praising and conniving at children.
There are also some families where fathers educate their children and mothers play the devil's advocate?
Once, I went to a friend's house. Before entering the door, their little boy shouted angrily, "Everyone in the family is fine except Dad!" " ! Dad always scolds me, and it will be bad for me to see him! "
Why did the little boy come to this conclusion? The child's father later told me that he was wronged because everyone in the family loved and indulged the child except him: grandma gave the child candy indefinitely; The mother always gives whatever toys the children want to buy; When children want to watch cartoons, grandpa gives them the remote control ... He said, "Children are his own, let them grow like weeds. If there is no educational constraint, he will be in big trouble when he grows up ..." Except for his conscientious father, everyone else in the family sings red-faced. No wonder children have the conclusion that "it must be bad to see his father".
What harm will the contradiction between husband and wife's educational behavior bring?
First of all, children will be confused.
A mother once told me that her children are often criticized by teachers as "Mr. Who knows nothing". Once a kindergarten held a parent-child activity, the teacher asked a question on the podium: "Will eating sugar lead to tooth decay?" Almost all the children said "yes", only her son said "I don't know". Mothers usually strictly control their children's eating sugar, but fathers don't think so. He said: "When I was young, all the children loved to eat sugar, and they stuttered when eating sugar cubes and rock candy. Nothing happened."
In family education, the education of father and mother is inconsistent or even contradictory, which often brings confusion and confusion to children.
Those who educate children will be rejected by children.
Children always like to do things that make them happy, such as eating snacks, drinking drinks, watching TV and buying toys ... When adults meet their requirements, these adults are quietly labeled as "love me" by children; When adults don't meet their requirements, these adults are quietly labeled as "don't love me" by children. When all the adults in the family agree not to indulge their children, the children will listen instead.