But for children, their behavior often runs counter to their parents' wishes. Most children can't manage their emotions and temper well. If something happens, he will cry and even get angry. Out-of-control emotional management always makes parents feel helpless and don't know how to deal with it correctly.
First, the mental development is immature
Children are still in the process of growing and maturing, both physically and psychologically. They still lack basic abilities and have not mastered enough skills in judging many things.
Fundamentally speaking, the child is still a little guy with emotional thinking. They don't think too much about the impact of their actions on others or the environment. As long as they feel the need to vent their emotions, they will show it openly.
Compared with their rational thinking, perceptual thinking always prevails. So crying and laughing are just natural manifestations of children's nature.
Second, there are obstacles to expression.
For children, language skills are still lacking, and they can't express their demands in appropriate language for what they want. Especially for some relatively complicated requirements, or things that need some complicated expressions to make it clear. For children, the lack of vocabulary is likely to cause words to fail to express their meaning and cause misunderstanding of others. Or obvious mistakes in grammar, causing confusion to others. This is the main contradiction that children have in the process of communication.
Therefore, it also caused their own needs not to be met in time, leading to emotional out of control. Even the more communication, the more chaotic the expression of meaning, which eventually leads to mental impatience and can only be vented by crying.
Third, feeling neglected.
Children are always fragile, which is determined by the limitations of physical conditions. Lack of skills can easily make children feel insecure, so they often need comfort and protection from their parents.
They will also use various methods to express this appeal, but some expressions are obscure, and parents can't always turn around their children. When children feel neglected, their psychological endurance will be reduced.
If repeated demands are not met, it is easy for them to close the emotional gate and let tears gush out. First, face up to the needs of children.
Children's needs for life are actually very simple. Parents must respond positively to their children's needs. For example, sometimes children talk to their parents just to get psychological satisfaction. Therefore, parents should never be perfunctory, and never ignore their needs because they are busy with housework.
Only timely response can make children feel valued and concerned, and can make children feel satisfied and safe psychologically. They will not be pessimistic easily, and the possibility of losing control of their emotions will be significantly reduced.
Second, help children solve problems.
When children express their needs and emotions in an inappropriate way, parents should first accept their negative emotional expressions, and never severely reprimand and accuse them.
This will only add fuel to the fire and make the child's mood worse. When children calm down, parents can ask their children's needs patiently, tell them the correct expressions, and then tell them that there are better ways to solve their needs and difficulties.
Let children feel the love and care of their parents, gradually learn the ways and means to deal with problems correctly, and try to reduce the behavior of losing their temper to achieve their goals. Third, train children to manage themselves.
Emotional management is only a part of children's self-management. The acquisition of these skills is not single, but closely related to other self-management. Therefore, parents should consider their children's emotional management within the scope of self-management.
When children should eat by themselves, they should learn to eat by themselves slowly, and then gradually arrange children to master some necessary life skills, dress themselves, go to the toilet and so on according to their abilities.
You can even help your parents with the housework. Through the training of comprehensive ability, children can gradually establish their own problem-solving ability, thus laying the foundation for the control of emotional management.
Fourth, help children identify emotions.
Children express their emotions spontaneously. They completely care about their inner feelings to express their emotions, and they don't care about the feelings of others and their influence on the surrounding environment.
In this regard, parents should educate their children on emotions from an early age, and they need to tell their children to understand the causes of different emotions and the importance of various emotions in solving things. In this way, let the children know that crying and losing their temper are the ways to solve things.