2. Give children more praise and encouragement. Giving children more appreciative eyes is conducive to cultivating children's good moral behavior habits and qualities, and is conducive to enhancing parents' trust in their children. If you give your child more appreciation, you will see her unique advantages and strengths. Seeing her little progress, we will affirm her, encourage her persistently, guide her patiently, treat her peacefully and support her with practical actions. This is very necessary.
3. Strengthen communication and contact with class teachers and teachers. Introduce the child to the class teacher. For example, at the beginning of school, we emphasized to the class teacher that the children were timid and honest, and asked the teacher to take care of them. After that, I often know the situation from the class teacher and the teacher, insist on reading the contact book and signing it every day, and report the child's little progress to the class teacher and the teacher to facilitate timely communication with the class teacher. A teacher's ability depends not only on her teaching quality, but also on how she teaches her children to be human and how she communicates with students and parents. Parents are very important and teachers are the key to the smooth growth of children. This semester, the children have made great progress, and they have been able to raise their hands voluntarily and their voices have become louder. Through the training of class teachers and teachers, children become confident and cheerful, and they also make some friends at school. In this regard, as a parent, I feel very gratified.
4. Pay attention to daily communication with children and help them overcome their shortcomings. We attach great importance to communication with our children, and let her talk about the advantages and disadvantages of her classmates, and what shortcomings need to be improved. For example, our daughter is easy to be careless and always regards addition as subtraction and subtraction as addition. We designed some homework, including many careless mistakes, and specially asked her to be a "teacher" to correct them. After several times of repeated training, the mistakes in this area have been significantly reduced. In view of her bad habit of eating slowly, we will try our best to cultivate her habit of doing things quickly and explain to her that only by doing our own things well as soon as possible can we have time to play or learn other things.
Don't get angry with children easily. We feel that we are often angry with children. There will be two outcomes. First, she's used to it and thinks it's no big deal that you're angry. Second, she will be afraid of you because she is timid, which will make her flinch from you. If she is often angry, she will report good news instead of worries, and parents will not know the real situation of their children, so education will be passive. Educating children is a complex systematic project, which can only be done slowly.
6. Fully respect the child's nature and cultivate her to learn to rest and adjust. Curiosity, rich imagination and competitiveness are the three elements of children's growth. Because children in Grade One are young and love to play by nature, in this respect, we should ensure that children have enough mobile time to play and relax and do what they like. At the same time, children have to attend six classes every day, and it is very hard and tired to go home every day. In this regard, as parents, first, do a good job in various logistics services for her, strengthen supplementary nutrition, and help her relieve fatigue; The second is to teach her to rest and adjust. For example, listen to music, close your eyes and relax for a while (of course, it is best for the school to let junior students study at home every Wednesday afternoon to take this opportunity to make appropriate adjustments). It is an intellectual peak that appears immediately after exhaustion. During the period, she was asked to finish her homework and read extracurricular books.
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How parents educate and train their children is the focus of today's society. Children from kindergarten to primary school, from primary school to junior high school, high school and finally to college are the central topics people talk about. It is not surprising that parents and grandparents often arrange the life of the whole family around a child.
Times have changed, the living environment is superior, and family planning makes a family have only one child. Who doesn't care who doesn't love? This also invisibly gives children a sense of self-superiority. Even if some parents don't spoil their children, this phenomenon in society will affect their children, and children are very aware of their "status" at home. According to the analysis of these phenomena, children nowadays generally have the following problems: (1) There are too many entertainment items and they are not interested in learning; Good living conditions, do not want to suffer more; Too many people love you, but you don't listen to the opposite opinion, and so on. Therefore, educating and cultivating children is a headache. Here, I will briefly talk about my experience and lessons brought by my success and failure in this respect, and also give other parents a reference.
First, communicate with each other.
The problems of education and raising children cannot be explained quickly. It needs a rather difficult, complicated and long stage, and then through this stage, we will constantly sum up experiences and lessons and take measures, which may or may not be successful. But as long as you have been working hard, paying painstaking efforts and costs, and treating everything correctly, there will be good results.
I didn't deliberately raise my children, but the necessary care and education were not omitted. The first is to learn how to communicate with each other, how to cultivate the feelings between father and son, and how to talk to him. You needn't talk about the truth. At this point, some parents mistakenly think that telling the truth to their children will have a good result, but it doesn't! Children are born naive and like to listen to happy things. Unhappy things can cause disgust, even alienate you, and you can't communicate. This is very important. I think if my children like me, get close to me and even worship me, this is the first step to success. Next, it is not impossible for him to listen to the truth occasionally. Of course, don't push your luck, or he will be completely abandoned. The reason should be easy to understand, as long as he understands, he will stop immediately, otherwise he will give up the important reason. In addition, after children get along with their parents, they will naturally ask many questions for their parents to answer. Parents must seriously answer questions within their power. If they let their children down, they will ask fewer and fewer questions. At this point, obstacles will begin to appear and crises will begin to lurk.
All children are naturally playful. My measure is to join in and play with him. No matter what game you play, you should look for opportunities to achieve the purpose of education and training in the process of playing. In the past, I seldom played ball. In order to achieve my goal, I often play football, basketball, table tennis and so on with my children. After all, there is a certain gap between children and adults, so I often deliberately let him go when he is about to lose confidence; But when he became proud, I hit him mercilessly. He can at least experience the taste of victory and failure. This is also a way of education, not a lecture, so that he can experience some philosophy of life personally. If you simply satisfy his happiness, he will think victory is easy; On the other hand, if he always fails, he will lose the sense of competition. From a macro point of view, a small stadium is the same as the big "stadium" of life. In short, parents must learn how to "fly with the wind" when their children are interested, even if it doesn't obviously help him. Of course, anyone can tell the truth, but it is not so easy to do it. I often forget myself when I am upset.
Second, be good at discovering.
Education and training are two inseparable parts. Therefore, in the process of educating children, we should pay attention to cultivating children's specialties and interests. I am a mother who loves music very much. I really hope my child will like music like me in the future, so I let him play the piano when he was five years old. In the process of playing the piano, I found his strengths. He has a unique talent for music. Seems very important; Training, first of all, can't make him tired of piano, let alone force him to do what I wish. So when he doesn't want to play the piano, I don't criticize him. I just look for opportunities to tell him some interesting stories and stories about music. At this time, "guidance" should be the main means. Once he becomes interested in a problem, he will immediately seize it, encourage and praise him. Although he plays the piano slowly, the main reason is that he stops for too long, more than half a year at most, but he never gets bored. This is also a success. Since then, he has become more and more interested in music. I am sure that music has become an indispensable part of his life at present.
I am too lazy to cultivate my interest in children. I study piano, percussion and badminton, including extra-curricular classes of Chinese and mathematics, and so on. I don't want to talk about it.
In addition to discovering the advantages of children, we should also be good at discovering their shortcomings. My child has many shortcomings, the most prominent of which is timidity and fear of contacting people, especially teachers. This is a fatal flaw. People's life is mainly about dealing with people, otherwise you will be isolated and lead to abnormal personality. Besides, no matter how talented a person is, if he doesn't get in touch with others, he can't display his skills, and he becomes a waste. So I must work hard to cultivate and train him. I try my best to work with him and let him experience exercise on all occasions where I can exercise him. Speaking of this problem, I want to thank the school leaders and teachers, who have provided many opportunities for my children, such as the performance of Children's Day on June 1 and the performance of the class collective party. As a parent, he tried his best to borrow musical instruments, rent a car, move things, coach and so on, so that his children got full exercise. Although not as brave as other children, they have made great progress compared with the past.
Secondly, children show a lack of logical thinking when doing math homework, so I oppose rote learning in the process of tutoring and emphasize process thinking. Even if the result is wrong, the method must be correct, and thinking must be logical first. When I was in primary school, I induced him in this respect almost every holiday. Similarly, we are less than others, but much better than ourselves.
Of course, raising children is not always such a model. Different educational methods should be formulated according to his own conditions, personality and hobbies, which is the complexity of hunger.
Third, treat it correctly.
All children have their own advantages, but there are inevitably shortcomings and mistakes. How to treat every achievement and every mistake of a child is a key issue for parents to consider.
Achievements should be praised and mistakes criticized, but the scale of praise and criticism is difficult to grasp. It is impossible not to encourage or criticize, but children who are too eager to encourage and criticize often have abnormal mentality. How to treat a few words is hard to say clearly. Here are only specific examples for your reference.
For a time, children did well in school, and almost every subject was A+. In order to encourage him, we not only praised him, but also bought many things he liked to eat, play and wear, and even met his slightly excessive requirements. As a result, the mid-term exam was not ideal. Through this incident, we gradually learned how to grasp the sense of proportion, and we should praise what should be praised, but never go too far.
Once we accidentally found a lot of B's in his exercise book. I was very angry at that time, but calm down and don't be impatient, so as not to hurt his self-esteem, which backfired. So I asked him calmly, "where did you get so much homework?" Did you accidentally do your homework again? " He made some explanations. Although his explanation is obviously far-fetched, I don't need to expose it. At least he knows that he is wrong, even a slight accusation depends on how he knows. I think grades are very important, but what is more important is learning attitude and learning process. Paying attention to attitude and process will inevitably lead to good results in the end.
Some people may think that my requirements for children are too loose, but they are not. When it comes to the key, be strict. Once I heard that their extracurricular classes were cancelled three times in a row. He lied about going to class, but actually went to play ball. I was rude this time. When I got home, I lost my temper and gave him a good lesson. Playing ball is not a bad thing, mainly for his way of lying. He seldom sees me lose my temper, so he thinks he may have made a big mistake and is a little scared. I seized this opportunity and told him a lot about being a man, and he naturally listened. After that, he never found himself making similar mistakes.
In short, parents should not be too happy when children have some achievements; Don't get angry easily when you make a mistake. On the one hand, you should leave room for your children. On the other hand, you should seize the opportunity to educate him rationally when he knows his mistake. How to treat it correctly depends on the situation at that time.
Fourth, find a way out.
It is also helpful to point out your future direction to your child in advance, so that your child can have a goal and know what he should do. I have made great efforts for my children in this respect.
As I said before, children have a special talent in music. You must make it clear to him that doing other things is probably not your strong point and you will fail. For example, if you like sports, I have no objection, but when you plan to engage in sports, you know exactly what will happen. Children also have self-knowledge. When it comes to this matter, he never refutes it. He knows that the road pointed out by adults is correct, and this goal will not change, but how to implement it in action.
Compared with ordinary children, my children have much more things to do every day. Practice piano, percussion, music, solfeggio, listening, notation and so on at noon, evening and weekend every day. Although he felt too stressed and sometimes seemed passive, he didn't find any reason to relax. In fact, I see it in my eyes and sympathize with it in my heart, so I can't talk about severity. Finally, I can only make a slight adjustment on the weekend and take him to some activities he likes, so that he won't feel so bored.
In the past two years, children have mastered a certain skill without affecting their academic performance, which is a skill acquired by hard work. In other words, he is trading the pain of the present for the happiness of the future, which he has long understood. He once said to other children: You play less now, so that you can play more later. Parents must have played a certain role in the formation of his consciousness. Therefore, the behavior of adults does have a great impact on children. This shows that education and training are our parents' unshirkable responsibilities and obligations.