Affinity is the foundation of trust! Without affinity, there is no trust.
Especially in the current new retail environment, in the whole process of product sales, trust is the keynote. If there is not enough affinity, sales often cannot be carried out.
Affinity in a narrow sense refers to a person's sense of closeness in the eyes of his group;
Broadly speaking, it refers to the influence that a person can exert on his group.
Affinity comes from people's recognition and respect for people. In many cases, affinity expresses not the physical distance between people, but the spiritual closeness and harmony, which is the basis for the transformation of mutual interests based on treating others equally. True affinity, based on good feelings and fraternity, is a special gift and accomplishment from the heart.
Why is affinity so important?
Affinity is the foundation of interpersonal relationship, just like the foundation of a building.
The understanding of affinity is related to the following words:
Everyone has a desire to be respected, so no matter the position of the other person, you must first respect him from the heart. You can't despise him just because he is lower than you. On the contrary, you have respect for those who are in high positions, which is not real respect. If you don't even have the minimum respect for your subordinates, it's meaningless to talk about affinity.
Modesty There is a kind of "boss" who thinks that he must be better than his subordinates everywhere when he sits in the position of manager. They don't listen to their feedback and suggestions, and everything is his most correct. He may have forgotten that there is another word in the dictionary called modesty, which means modesty and peace. Speaking of modesty, he suddenly remembered a classic saying of Jobs, Stay hungry and stay stupid. Peace, I think it is the least to learn to control your emotions. You can't lose your temper just because you are a manager, and you can scold if you want. It seems that you will never make mistakes, even if you are managing children, it seems inappropriate.
4. Be honest and keep your promise, and keep your word. If people don't believe, they will fail. If the family doesn't believe it, the country will be in danger.
Affinity refers to creating a safe, respectful and supportive environment, thus establishing continuous mutual respect and trust. Here are six o'clock:
(a) Really care about the interests and future of customers;
(two) constantly show personal integrity, honesty and integrity;
(three) to establish a clear agreement and keep the promise;
(4) Respecting customers' ideas, learning styles and personalities;
(five) to provide continuous support and promotion for new behaviors and actions, including those involving risks and fear of failure;
(6) When coaching in sensitive and new fields, the coach should strive for the consent of the clients.
Do you think it's so complicated? In fact, we only need three key words to sum it up.
1, safe
Step 2 respect
Step 3 support
These three words are not understood logically, but about experience. However, these three words are progressive in logical relationship.
1, sense of security
What is a sense of security? Where do we usually feel safest? Unless there is an accident, it is of course our parents' home. So when you want to have a conversation as a coach, can you keep the kind of love that parents tolerate their children? Only in this way can the other party feel absolutely safe.
Step 2 respect
What is respect? Respect is to let customers say what they want to say in the process of dialogue and express their psychological whimsy, even if it is ridiculous in the eyes of others. But for us, it is still necessary to maintain this state of inner acceptance.
Step 3 support
Support means that you can support whatever the other person thinks or makes. Can you still encourage him to take a road that most people think is doomed to failure?
If you can do the above three points, I believe your affinity will be done well.
"It seems that it is not people who can do this, is it God?"
It seems to be the same. Have you found that many famous sports coaches in history are supernatural? For example, the legendary NBA coach Phil Jackson, nicknamed "Jackson". And the person who has the greatest influence on Jobs, let's be his coach-Kobun Otogawa, who is a monk himself.
You can also find that in many American inspirational sports movies, the life mentors of the protagonists are all related to religion, including devout believers and priests.
As you can see, these religious people have treated people around them with support from the beginning, whether they are familiar or unfamiliar.
So when you are in this state of mind, you can naturally communicate well with your partner, and at the same time let the other party gradually open up.
Let's look at another chart:
This is the energy level chart of David Hawkins, a famous American psychology professor, in The Relationship between Mentality and Energy Level, which is divided into positive energy level and negative energy level. This is the research result of David Hawkins, and we are now applying this result to our coaches. As coaches, our energy level must be at least 250 (calm) to establish the above affinity relationship with customers.
The higher the energy level, such as 3 10/0,350 or even 450,500, the easier it is for us to establish an affinity relationship with customers. If we are at a negative energy level, such as below 200 (courage), I am afraid that the affinity relationship we have established with our customers will hardly meet the basic requirements.
When we are with customers, you should check your affinity in your mind. Are you ready to support him with customers? I believe that you can support each other and that the customer can find his answer. If you are in this state, it means that your affinity has reached the standard.
To be proactive, we should reach the energy level of 3 10. In this case, your words and deeds are moving in the direction of positive energy. In the state of 3 10 energy level, you can also realize that your energy must be more abundant. I won't elaborate here, just let everyone know that when our energy level is relatively high, it will be easier for us to support our customers.
Of course, the support mentioned here does not mean that you can drill to a higher energy level in a short time, and you need a little bit of precipitation. According to my personal experience, I think this affinity is first of all trust in yourself, that is, love and believe in yourself. Building trust in yourself is more important than the trust of others.
My personal experience is that keeping promises is the best way to build trust. Keeping faith is not only keeping faith with others, but also keeping faith with yourself. When a person keeps his word to himself, no matter what you say or decide, you will become very cautious. Once you say something, you should go all out to finish it.
When we practice the ability of affinity, it is applicable to all areas of life, because its dribs and drabs of practice point to your personal inner quality. As a coach, the most basic accomplishment is to start from self-training.
This affinity is only intrinsic. How can we judge the affinity of others?
1, focus
Is to focus on the customer, not the coach himself.
In fact, similar nouns can be found in other disciplines.
In psychology, there is a word called "empathy", which is also called empathy and empathy. Empathy is also translated as empathy, empathy and affection. The concept elaborated by Rogers, the founder of humanism. Empathy means that the coach should go deep into the other person's heart to understand his feelings and thoughts, grasp the relationship between the experience of the helped person and his experience and personality, and better understand the essence of the problem. At the same time, the coach also needs to let the other side know his feelings and get feedback.
In the field of sales, sales also need to have empathy, to be able to stand in the position of consumers, to feel the reaction of consumers with empathy, and to guide consumers' emotional identity. But the coach does not need to guide the customer's approval, but only needs companionship and support. Feel like air, push the other person to follow his own heart.
Step 2 accept
Coaches are comfortable with the "unknown", or they are not afraid of any unknown. As vernacular Chinese has become very common, "everything is the best arrangement." Whatever it is, the coach can accept it.
A coach doesn't need to fully understand each other's ideas, but we need to understand his values, so as to guide him to his own goals. Just like a lighthouse, let the other person see the direction and let him find his own way in the dark.
Step 3 support
The coach believes that the customer already has the resources needed for success, and believes that the customer will definitely find a suitable solution. A coach is always a partner in a relationship, and all the skills in self-support are skilled and confident.
1, voice training
One way is to record the words and then listen to your own voice.
You need to have self-knowledge, no matter what the situation is, no matter who you are with, you should let your voice speak soft words. This is something that needs exercise and warm words. This needs exercise.
In the last demonstration class, my partner's voice should be quite appropriate, because she used to be a psychological counselor, so the whole person's aura, voice and intonation are very appropriate, but my machine gun speaker still complained that she spoke slowly, so it seems that I still need to practice.
Step 2 smile
Try to exercise your smile. Take some time to relax yourself every day, be in a very comfortable state, smile from the heart and practice smiling at yourself from the heart.
In fact, this skill should not be a big problem for salespeople. After all, it is the basic skill of many salespeople.
Step 3 build relationships with strangers
Routine of set relation
First, greetings
Polite language, small things around you (weather, traffic, children, etc. ), looking for common ground.
B, praise
Attention to detail.
The expert's advice is to meet people in the street.
Personally, I think I can do it by biting my teeth. After all, I sold it for so many years and sold it directly for several years. Teasing strangers is a basic skill. But this method is a big challenge for many people.
At the same time, I think there is one more thing to share. For the key points of building a relationship with strangers, deal with good voice, intonation, smile, courage and so on. As mentioned above, there is also your professionalism.
Because there is a saying in the field of sales, to build the trust of customers, we need to cut in from two aspects.
1) Emotional trust
2) Professional trust
Emotional trust can be practiced from the above aspects.
And how to build professional trust? The coach's products are invisible, invisible and intangible. How is the effect reflected?
I remember I shared it in the article "The Law of Attraction of Coaches". The performance of the effect is "customer witness", and the successful customer case is the best evidence of the professional level of the coach.
Let's summarize the two aspects we talked about today.
First, the performance of affinity
(a) focus on customers.
(2) accept everything in the future.
(3) Unconditional support for customers
Second, the affinity of the training content
(a) a gentle tone
2. Smile
(3) Know strangers
Enhance professional skills
Finally, I end this chapter on affinity with a famous saying by Ms. marva collins.
Let me briefly introduce marva collins, a legendary figure in American education in the last century. Both Reagan and George H.W. Bush invited her to be the Minister of Education, but she declined. Her most magical story is that in a poorly educated area, when all the teachers just perfunctory students to stay in school for a while, Mawa used her own educational ideas and teaching methods to turn every "devil in the world" in her class into a studious student and let everyone be admitted to the university.
Attention, it's every one.
And I want to send you a word, which is also a word that Mawa encourages students at every opening ceremony. Say this to yourself and your friends several times, and your affinity will get better and better.
Here you are:
I believe you,
You can succeed,
Take responsibility for yourself,
Stop complaining,
Stop complaining about society,
Stop complaining about the teacher,
Stop complaining about your parents,
Happiness is in you.