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The game between human nature
Some time ago, I chatted with my girlfriends who I haven't seen for a long time and talked about my thoughts on marriage and family life. My best friend instilled in me an idea that I had never seriously thought about. She said that in any relationship, getting along with people is actually a process of constant trial and game, which can be reflected, such as between husband and wife, between parents and children.

For a simple example, you ask your boyfriend to wash the dishes, and he asks you to go after this game. But two hours later, you find that the dishes haven't been washed. Are you angry and quarreling with him at this time, or are you really angry and washing dishes with him? Most girls in reality will do this. But if you don't see it now, you don't care. Since he promised you, he might finish it later, but he didn't leave at once. In other words, since he can stand it, so should you. Don't try to finish it at once. Then what does he do? In this trivial game, girls lose, and boys are constantly testing your bottom line. Since he knows that someone will do something good as long as he delays for a while, why not do such a good thing? In the long run, some boys will think that girls' efforts are worthwhile and push their luck.

It doesn't mean that the relationship between men and women must be won or lost. What we want is the balance of this relationship. People are constantly trying, everyone can play games, even children know that rolling around can get the candy and gifts they want, let alone the world of adults. This is human nature.

In the past month, a new roommate moved into the dormitory, which broke my life of being alone for more than a year. My roommate was born at 0 1. At first, there was no obvious generation gap between my post-95 generation and 0 1 generation, but these ideological differences and differences gradually emerged after getting along. Everyone is a unique individual, even if there are differences in the same age group, it doesn't make any sense to say here after 00. I just feel that the possible growth environment is different and the gap will be different.

Take a little thing these days. I am not a diligent person who likes to do housework. Like most young people, I am too lazy to move after work, so I have never asked when the dormitory hygiene regulations will be issued and how many times a week. In my mind, I just follow my heart, do what I want, and drag it when the ground is dirty. One night when I was brushing my teeth, I saw that the bathroom needed cleaning, especially on the squatting side, so I told her about it.

Me: "We need to clean the bathroom." She: "What's wrong with this? Maybe you just have to clean the sink. Alas, I always thought that squatting there was like that. " ? Me: "If you have a toilet brush, you can clean it with a brush. Some old stains of toilet cleaner can't be removed. " ? She: "Hey, how to brush this? I always feel so dirty. " Me: "No, I have painted some places before. It's true that the stains left by others can't be cleaned after a long time. Those above are obviously washable. It's not that I won't clean them, but that I don't do them every day. " ? I kept explaining to her that I didn't understand why she kept saying that squatting in the toilet was so dirty. ) She: "I think the stain on the ceiling needs cleaning." ? Me: "the stain on the ceiling was left by the people who lived before, and it took a long time." We can't reach this height and have no tools. We just need to clean up what we can get, which is not painful. I won't do it. Don't think about the ceiling and get yourself into trouble. "

? I really don't have the patience to explain to her at this time, and I can't stand the toilet hygiene that night myself. After cleaning, I reminded her to be careful when going to the toilet next time. Maybe it's because I'm a little angry or embarrassed. She said that she would come next time, but at the same time, she said that she always felt that the toilet was so sanitary when she came. I really don't understand what she said. Can't you see that there is more and more dirt visible to the naked eye in the bathroom?

In my spare time, I had a brief chat with my girlfriend for an hour. I asked my girlfriend if this was a small game and if I lost in this game because I couldn't stand it. According to my best friend, excluding personal habits is a small game. After all, you can't stand it in front of her, so you should take the initiative to undertake hygiene first. In fact, the sanitary division of this dormitory should be well defined in advance. If you set the rules, you won't put yourself in this situation. ? I can understand what my best friend said. Because I am a casual person, I don't like doing housework every day. If I feel dirty, I will drag it every day. There is no need to put it off every day. Just keep a clean and tidy foundation. But it turned out that I really wanted to do it only when I saw that the floor was dirty. If I have to remind you every time, I will be really tired and feel unnecessary. Maybe the other party didn't realize their unwritten rules. Everyone has different ways of thinking and concerns about the same thing, and there is no absolute right or wrong. I also acknowledge these differences.

In life, people get along with each other because of different viewpoints and positions, and there will be various running-in and games. In these large and small games, what we are pursuing is not absolute winning or losing, but perhaps balance and reciprocity under the premise of protecting our own interests.