The ninth time, Jia Dairu has something to do. He left homework for the students and then went home. He asked Gary to temporarily manage what he had learned. In this narrative in the book, "Gary is the meanest person, blackmailing his children to invite him every time he goes to school;" Later, I asked Xue Pan to buy some money, wine and meat. "。 The former Xue Pan was a bully. Instead of keeping the contract, he helped him please his son. When Gary saw Qin Zhongxiang, who was lazy, suing Jin Rong, he didn't mediate impartially. Instead, he took white incense for personal gain and took pity on jade, which made Jin Rong more arrogant and unreasonable, leading to chaos in the school. After being robbed by Gui Li, Gary was afraid of making a big deal out of things and suppressed things at random. This incident just proves that Gary has no heart, no principles, no morality, no right and wrong, and no boundaries in his behavior. This is the mental paralysis without personality, self-cultivation and soul. Such people are like vines, spreading and growing at will, climbing regardless of advantages and disadvantages. It is not surprising that Gary is attached to Xue Fan for money, wine and meat.
The eleventh time, when Xifeng was enjoying the scenery in Ningfu Garden, she met the frivolous and treacherous Jia Rui. The twelfth time, the reply was "Wang Xifeng set up a lovesickness bureau, and Jia Tianxiang looked at the moon." This time, he focused on Gary. Xifeng designed and rectified Jia Rui again and again, but Jia Rui was possessed by ghosts, unrepentant and eventually died.
In this chapter, it is shameful and sad to read out the interests of Xi Feng and Jia Rui's nausea. If you think about it carefully, you will feel pity and sympathy for Jia Rui. Gary is a young boy. Why is this?
Back to Gary's growing environment. "It turns out that Jia Rui's parents died young and only his grandfather raised Confucianism." Who is Jia Dairu? In the Ninth Lecture, when talking about Jia Jiayi, he wrote, "A total of highly virtuous people are invited as school owners, specially for the children of the training class." It can be inferred that Jia Dairu's academic character is well-known. "That generation of Confucianism taught the strictest lesson, and Jia Rui was not allowed to take another step, fearing that he would eat and gamble outside and miss his studies." As an educator, Jia Dairu is knowledgeable, virtuous, and attaches great importance to his studies, and his discipline is extremely strict, which limits Gary's actions for fear that he will fool around outside. Judging from the actual growth results of Gary, Jia Dairu's conduct did not affect his grandson, and the academic courses arranged did not attract his grandson, which restrained him from going further and further on the evil road. Is Gary really born a deadwood?
With questions, further search for answers in the sentence, Jia Dairu "saw that he didn't come home all night today, only thought that he was drinking or gambling with prostitutes, but he didn't think of this case, so he was angry all night." The word "expected" shows that Jia Dairu knew his grandson was misbehaving. When Gary came back to lie, Jia Dairu didn't ask the truth, but made up his mind. He beat Gary thirty or forty times, punished him for not eating, and made him read articles in the hospital, and had to make up for ten days of work classes. In Jia Dairu's education model, playing board is communication, starving is punishment, and reading more books is education. I didn't care about the spiritual growth of my grandson, didn't look for the root of the problem, and just used brute force in the periphery, which obviously didn't have any effect on Gary, who had already gone astray.
It seems that Gary has no one to accompany him with love in his life, no grandma? After Gary died, grandma wrote, "Dairu and his wife cried their eyes out." According to the article, Jia Rui's grandmother didn't go home at night and she had no right to speak. She didn't come out to care about Gary when she was punished. In Gary's upbringing, there seems to be no grandmother's seat.
Jia Rui is a passer-by in A Dream of Red Mansions. He is mainly used to write about the viciousness of Xifeng's means. It is impossible to write too much about Gary's daily life. It is not difficult to find from simple records that Jia Rui lacked spiritual support in the process of growing up. Obviously, grandpa's strict education didn't nourish his spirit.
When a person's spirit is poor, he will grow wildly along the weeds of low-level desires; When a person's spirit is decadent, forced reading can only pretend to be the illusion of learning; When a person's spirit sinks, it is difficult to go ashore by himself. Raising children must focus on spiritual education and take spiritual education as the foundation. Jia Dairu's education of his grandson is incomplete, rough and gentle. He is old and lazy. His education didn't support the spirit of his grandson.
Spiritual education is a drip irrigation technology with love as the core. The Israelis developed drip irrigation technology that shocked the world and turned the desert into a "land flowing with milk and honey". The core of drip irrigation is directional, small, timely and efficient. Spiritual education is also inseparable from these points. Find problems, pay attention in time, explore the thinking logic and psychological motivation behind children's behavior, help children understand the serious consequences of bad behavior, and guide children to know more about the possibility and results of behavior. Talk about problems, talk about things, don't take the lead, don't go online, and don't make excessive evaluations involving the future of quality. Spiritual education is the soul of family education.
Gary didn't die of Xi 'an's vicious means, but was swallowed by a poisonous snake with low desire. Gary's spirit didn't grow with his body, and the fire of desire would burn his life sooner or later.
Gary's tragedy may be related to his self-indulgent nature, and it must also be related to his lack of good spiritual education. Exploring the root of Jia Rui's fate tragedy, we can get important enlightenment from family education.