Recently, a piece of news pushed the EQ class into public view: Ms. Huang, who lives in Shanghai, felt that her daughter in grade three "had no sound personality and healthy mentality", so she spent 20,000 yuan to enroll her daughter in an EQ training class. Although this is not a small expense, Mr. Huang is full of praise for the course, and thinks that the course is conducive to making up for the lack of campus courses in children's psychological construction and bringing positive changes to children's mentality. ("Morning News" September 20)
Indeed, EQ plays a very important role in one's life and work. High EQ will obviously enhance a person's social competitiveness, while low EQ will easily cause social obstacles. However, in order to cultivate the emotional intelligence of minors, it is not necessarily the best choice to spend a lot of money on "emotional intelligence class" for children. On the one hand, the "EQ class" is expensive, and Ms. Huang's daughter will spend 300 yuan on a class, so it is difficult for ordinary families to easily bear such a high cost; On the other hand, "EQ class" is still a kind of classroom education after all, and once-a-week class can only play a certain guiding role for children at most, and it cannot replace the cultivation of EQ in daily life.
In the final analysis, the responsibility of cultivating children's emotional intelligence still falls on family education. Parents are children's first teachers, who have the most frequent and close contact with children and know them best. Minors are immature and often imitate the adults around them when they grow up. Therefore, parents' words and deeds will set a good or bad example for their children and affect their personality development.
The core of "emotional intelligence" is the ability to know, understand and control one's own emotions, as well as the ability to communicate with others and integrate into the collective. The cultivation of these two abilities can not only rely on classroom learning, but also need to be practiced in daily life. Whether children can cultivate good emotional control and social skills depends largely on their parents.
If parents can manage their emotions well in daily life, intervene in time when their children have emotions and tell them the correct way to deal with them, children will naturally develop excellent emotional control ability. On the other hand, if parents always lose their temper and can't control themselves, children will certainly be biased.
In terms of communicative competence, the way children communicate with others is largely to imitate the way parents communicate with others. Good family education and parents' words and deeds will lay a solid foundation for children's EQ, but if parents always set a bad example for their children in daily life, or neglect their children, it will naturally have a negative impact on their EQ. The negative influence brought by this kind of family, even if taught by professional psychological educators, is difficult to eradicate easily.
It is certainly not a bad thing for parents to spend money on "EQ classes" for their children's good psychology. However, the important position of family education in children's growth process is irreplaceable. As long as the family education is done well, the icing on the cake of the EQ class is dispensable, but if the family education is not done well, no matter how expensive the EQ class is, it may not be able to achieve the goal of "giving timely help in the snow".