Gentleman's body, quiet to cultivate one's morality, frugal to Xiu De, not indifferent to clear ambition, not quiet and far-reaching. What is a gentleman, probably like a mirror, clear and transparent. A monarch who can make good use of admonishers always has a ruler in his heart. This ruler is the standard of his rule of the country and the measure of being strict with himself. What's the point of letting others do what they can't do? There is a famous saying in ancient times that a prime minister can punt in his stomach. Be considerate and tolerant when treating others. Lian Po of bring disgrace to oneself didn't get angry with Lin Xiangru, but avoided it everywhere. In the face of Lian Po's humble apology, he didn't take this opportunity to criticize him. Be strict with yourself, be lenient with others, and everyone who is not independent has a heart. "Blame yourself with a heart that blames others, and forgive others with a heart that forgives yourself" means demanding yourself with a strict attitude towards others and forgiving others with a tolerant attitude towards yourself.
Victor hugo, a great French writer, once said: The ocean is the widest in the world, the sky is wider than the ocean, and the human mind is wider than the sky. The sea has become vast because of tolerance; The sky is beautiful because of tolerance and continuous clouds; The reason why the mountain stands tall is because of tolerance and the collection of fine soil, dust and sand. People must learn to be tolerant before they can shine. Self-discipline and tolerance is one of the traditional virtues of the Chinese nation, and it is also a sign of a high quality. In this world, people must master the way of life in order to settle down. Don't be too hard on people, or things will turn against each other. He may not appreciate your kindness, but become an enemy. There is a saying in the Book of History: You can't have a physical examination unless you prepare with others. Confucius also said: I save three times a day. Be strict with yourself, be lenient with others, don't care too much about small things, and reflect on yourself in advance. You should know that "water is clear, without fish, people are ignorant." Excessive harshness will only stimulate the darkness of human nature, but it will deviate from your own wishes.
The same is true between friends. Bi Shumin once said that we should not expect too much from our friends. Friends are happy together and have no obligation to accept our perfection. We have no right to blame. Human nature has weaknesses, and blind criticism and accusation are precisely where these weaknesses lie. Even a saint can't really like you, not to mention there are saints in the world? As long as people contact with others, it is inevitable that there will be friction. And if people are angry, they will be like an irrational beast. Being angry is the dark side of your heart. How black a person is can usually be judged by his behavior after he is angry. Not only that, but also the image in the eyes of others will fall apart. Even if how to make up for it in the future, the shadow area left in others' hearts can only be reduced and will not disappear. As the saying goes, "a good word warms three winters, and a bad word hurts June." Since there are such disadvantages, how can we get rid of them Instead of removing it, it can only be said to avoid or reduce it.
From the two aspects of people and themselves, there is a saying that can be proved, "If you don't prepare with people, you can't check your body." Be lenient with others and be strict with yourself. Ask low of others and high of yourself. This will not only improve their own quality, but also reduce conflicts with others. Why not do it? Measurement is the most difficult to grasp. It's like knocking an egg. Too much force will break the yolk, and too little force will not open it. The same is true for yourself and others. Since ancient times, there has been a saying that "don't prepare with others, check your body before you are ready". Don't complain, but be strict with yourself. It is this "measurement" that can make people progress. Loose to others, tight to yourself, loose and tight, is the principle of being a man, a broad mind that does not haggle over every ounce, and the supreme spirit of Excellence! Everyone has his own paradise in his heart, enjoying comfort, sympathy and being cared for. But there are people around me who are not strict with themselves, but reach out and strive for perfection for others. Such a two-faced person reminds me of a sentence in Shangshu-don't prepare with others, don't prepare with others, don't prepare with others, and don't take exams with others. It probably means: not being strict with others, but being strict with yourself. This is the principle of self-cultivation that people lack now. I visit my body three times a day. If I have no standards for myself, how can I interfere with others? If you are not ready to be with others, you will be unprepared.
Nothing will be perfect, don't be perfect, this is one of the tenets of life. Lin Xiangru did not dispute or complain, thus making Zhao immortal and winning the respect of Lian Po. Tang Xinru is like a mirror, so he achieved Daming's glory and escaped Zhu Yuanzhang's butcher's knife. Chu Zhuangwang was very tolerant of soldiers, so he made Chu strong and won the loyalty of soldiers. It is because of tolerance that today's wonderful; It is because of indifference that we have today's glory. Self-discipline should bring autumn wind. Autumn wind is the wind that kills the cold. Be upright, in a quiet autumn. For the defects of bad habits, when the autumn wind sweeps the leaves, it is generally merciless. Only in this way can we overcome the weakness of our own personality and gradually improve ourselves in introspection.
Just as Emperor Taizong took Wei Zhi as a mirror, he reflected day by day and was strict with himself, which finally opened a prosperous Tang Dynasty. Life must bring spring breeze. Spring breeze is a harmonious and warm wind. Do things with the tenderness of early spring. People who associate with others should usually be gentle, tolerant and respectful of the spring breeze. Confucius believes that forgiveness is a word that can be pursued for life, so there is a saying that "don't do to others what you don't want others to do to you." Lin Xiangru put the overall situation first, endured humiliation, tolerated Lian Po, and finally got a "reconciliation" story. If you are not ready to be with others, you will be unprepared. We should not only have the habit of introspection and self-discipline, but also have the mind of the sea and sky and the spirit of letting all rivers flow. What a person needs to grasp most in this society is the appropriate limit. Just as the history book says, "You can't have a physical examination without asking for preparation." This is a good state. Imagine if you ask others to do a good thing that you can't even do yourself, how can others agree and accept it? Obviously, you are not sure about the appropriate restrictions. You don't know how to ask yourself and others.
The old adage "Don't do to others what you don't want others to do to you" still shines with its own truth after years of precipitation. I want to ask, if someone imposes something you don't like on you, will you really appreciate it and really want it? "I want what I want" gives the answer: "Hu er and it, the people on the street are blessed; It was a slap in the face, and people dismissed it. "The reason is very simple. People have backbone. If you don't understand this simple truth, naturally you won't know the importance of the appropriate limit, let alone try to grasp the appropriate limit. Finally, it broke up, broke up. Appropriate restrictions are the boundaries between people. If you don't grasp the appropriate limits, it seems that you will lose the smile of interpersonal communication, and the consequences will be unimaginable.
The process of growing up is painful and necessary. I really think proper restrictions are important, not just words.